I'm not sure when or why it started to happen, but everything about my life was becoming sexualized, saturated with a palpable feeling of endless desire. I mean, math class is not supposed to be sensual, but there I was, half listening to Dr. Hu drone on at the board solving integral equations, and I all I could think about was, I need. I want. I need.
I tried to think about math, but I ended up thinking about sex. About how my orgasms were becoming mathematical, not merely because they were so numerous lately but because there seemed to be some logarithmic equation that could explain them, how they magnified exponentially as the approach infinity, which is what they always approached of course as the blood started to coarse through me and my body began to quiver and every single muscle seemed to be spasming at once in a great magnificent pulse. I could see in my mind a graph of my pleasure level rising steadily, the slope ever increasing until it's shooting straight off the chart, approaching the limit but of course never reaching it because the pleasure seems to mount and mount and never abate, waves of pleasure, sine and cosine, getting stronger and stronger.
I pressed down against my black plastic chair that was connected to the desk, which was bolted to the floor. I bounced up and down a little, rocked my hips and flexed my thighs back and forth, trying to feel some friction. It felt like all I was is hungry, and wet, of course, and all that hunger was steaming out of my body through my throbbing pink pussy. I wondered if there were an equation for how many tongue licks on my clit it would take to get me off, if there was a coefficient for how sopping I was, if there was a function of x to determine the diameter of the cock that could fill me when I was so voraciously craving one in me.
Dr. Hu was moving on to the next problem; there was chalk dust all over his pants and the sleeves of his jacket. He didn't hardly even turn around to face the class, and I could see that some of my classmates were sleeping. I was surreptitiously hiking the back of my skirt up so I could roll my stocking-clad thighs over the cool plastic of the seat, then I was squeezing and rubbing my thighs together, thrilling to the bristling zip of nylon on nylon. I couldn't believe what was happening to me; it seemed to come out of nowhere. I didn't know becoming a sister in a sorority would be so sexual, would have me so turned on like all the fucking time!
I couldn't hardly think. I took off my glasses and cleaned them on my tank-top, and I tried to bear down on the thorny problem Dr. Hu was solving, but the squeaking of the chalk on the board was reminding me of the giggly squeals Eva had made when I was doing her with the strap-on. And just thinking about how that felt kept me excited. When I told Paige about it, later on when we were both in bed in our dorm room, we both got off. She asked so many questions, I could tell she was envious. What did it feel like to use another girl's hole like that? Did I feel manly? Am I officially bi now? How big were Eva's tits really? They couldn't possibly been as big as I described them, even though she was always a threat to explode a few blouse buttons.
I knew Paige was touching herself under her covers as we talked, and I wondered if she was thinking about whether I would consider using the strap-on on her -- I would -- or perhaps whether she was wishing she could use it on me. That would be more her style; I couldn't see her as the submissive type, but I could definitely see her brandishing some huge cock like a halberd and impaling me with it over and over. That's what I was thinking anyway as I was touching myself under the covers.
Dr. Hu intoned another problem out loud. "The definite integral of the function f on the interval a to b as it is defined by the differential of x equals limit zero to infinity, delta x minus...." I was still squirming in my chair, rubbing and bucking but hoping I wasn't being noticed. Maybe I wanted to be noticed, I don't know. With one hand I was holding a pencil, and my free hand was in my lap, applying pressure to my pussy, which felt engorged and on fire.
I wished I wasn't wearing any underwear, so I could just stick a finger up my cunt without any unnecessary hassles. I was riding the edge of my panties that were pushed up against the inner lips; it was just enough to tease me but not enough to send me over. Another 25 minutes of this, I thought, and I'll be ready to bend over my desk, spread my legs apart, thrust my ass out like a dog in heat and grind my aching clit against the edge of the desk. I'll whimper and beg to get fucked.
There I was, in a room filled with other students like me, were they thinking about sex too? I wondered if the slim Asian girl in front of me was able to smell how wet my panties are. She probably could. The thought humiliated me, but that only made me that much more wet. I thought of Pauline, of what she would say if she were here, how she would call me a filthy slut and a little whore who was just aching to get fucked all the time. I tugged the crotch of my satin thong up between the lips of my pussy. It went there easily and I knew the slippery evidence will be visible on the black satin when I got the house for pledge duty. I wondered if Pauline would know, and would make me show it to her. I don't know why; I just assumed she would know, she would be able to see it in my face.
Pauline. My big sister at the sorority, she started to seem like she could read my mind. And now, ever since the incident with Eva, I have this funny feeling in the pit of stomach whenever I am near her, and it just grows and gets close to overwhelming if I am alone with her. I can't stop thinking about how I want her to touch me, to caress me, to watch me with the strap-on on again and command me to play with her, to take her. I want to know what her pussy tastes like, what it smells like, I want her to grind it against my face until I can't breathe and I'm just smothered with her desire.
God, I wanted to come. I don't even know if Pauline would want me. I leaned back in the chair, and the silky smooth satin of my panties shifts back and forth across my ass, and it drove me crazy. I needed more. It felt like my panties were starting to leak. I started to shake, but not enough. I started daydreaming about Pauline watching me as I got fucked, and spontaneously I started imagining the glasses-wearing kid in the desk two rows in front nailing me. I imagined he would be so grateful, so compliant, that Pauline could tell him what to do to me, and he would just do it, no questions asked. And his cock would be sleek, and slice right into me, and I would climb up and down it like a fireman's pole, while Pauline watched me approvingly.
In the heat of this insane, overwhelming lust I felt like I've become no one, anyone; I don't even know my name anymore, just this yearning desire seeping from between my legs. My cunt actually hurt, I needed to come so badly. I needed it hard and fast. Hands at the edge of my panties under my skirt, me wondering if I dared. Two fingers went to my pussy lips, circling, before pushing in and slithering back and forth, then up and out, to my mouth, and I tasted myself, smelled my lust on my fingers, which reminded me of the way Eva smelled when I had her.
I wondered, When will I stop feeling like a hole that needs to be fucked and start feeling like a person again? I thought again of Pauline. She was imperially slim, her hair always smooth along her crested forehead. Her lipstick never bled, her skirts always pressed perfectly. Everything was neatly aligned about her; everything matched. Her gloves matched her dress, her belt, her crocodile handbag dangling from the crook of her elbow. Her stockings never had runs, her kitten heels were always unscuffed. Her coiled hips in their sheath of slip, chiffon, immaculate. But me, I am a girl tumbling down the stairs, slamming drawers closed, cowlicks sticking obstinately up. I am rumpled beyond repair. I spill coffee on myself and snag the scarf around my neck on a tree branch. I am awkward and giraffelike, whereas she is a gazelle, gallant.
The Asian girl in front of me had the most delicate little hands. I watched them as she moved her pencil across her notebook, thinking about how much I wanted to suck those lithe little fingers, have them in my cunt, have them touching, teasing and tickling me. I imagined sucking on her thumb, making it glisten with saliva, and then guiding it to my waiting asshole. I don't know where the thought came from; it was so unlike me to think about things like that. But for a moment I was almost overwhelmed with a desire to eat that Asian girl's cute little box. I had noticed her before; stick thin but a nice little bump of a behind, tight and curvy and dying to be grabbed.
When class ended I had to rush back to my dorm to touch myself. I was a little disappointed when I got there to see that Paige was home, but I was so flustered and hot and turned on, I didn't know what to do. "Paige," I confessed, "Can I tell you something? I was sitting in math class and I couldn't stop thinking about it."
She was drinking a glass of milk from a glass and she had a cute little milk mustache. "Thinking about what," she said, licking her lip.
"What do you think?" I said. "It. Sex."
"That's not very mathlike," she said. "I thought it was all parabolas and graphs and junk like that. Don't tell me that stuff turns you on."
"It does," I said, "But not usually in this way. I was thinking about how I wanted to do like just about everybody in the class, and I don't know if you know this, but math classes are generally full of dorks."