A pale blue glow filled Amber's dorm room, casting a dim light on the barely organized chaos of her college life. She stared at her computer screen intently; it was taking every fiber of her being to not burst into tears. She replayed the conversation she had with her roommate over and over in her mind. It was as though there was a terrible song stuck in her head on repeat with no way to turn it off; mocking her naivety.
"Layla... I think I'm in love with you."
She had dumped out her entire soul, her fears, hopes, and dreams to Layla. She wasn't quite drunk; she was just in that happy state of mind where inhibitions seem so silly and pointless. "Why not say how you feel? What's holding me back?" she thought to herself. She planned out her syllables with measured care, and the naked truth slipped out of her mouth, filling the room with her feelings towards Layla.
Layla's face betrayed an expression that Amber couldn't interpret, and she reciprocated her love, albeit platonic, for Amber. A creeping tightness started closing in on Amber's insides as her brain caught up to her hormones. Too late she realized the enormity of what she said and the implications made her mind race. What started as confidence quickly turned to awkwardness and then blind panic as she struggled to think of what to say next.
"Do... do you think you love me... y'know, like... physically?"
Without missing a beat, Layla replied, "Amber, you are the most beautiful person I know. I love and value you so much. Have I thought about being with another girl? Absolutely, who hasn't? And if I were to be with another girl it would be you. I know with all my heart. But I'm not sexually attracted to other girls. There's just something about a guy's penis that turns me on. I'm sorry I just know in my heart it could never work.
Amber was devastated. But she was reminded exactly why she loved Layla in the first place. She could make her feel incredible about herself even when she was at her most vulnerable. Amber managed to smile weakly and decided at one last desperate plea.
"Would you try... umm... like, if I wore a dildo? I promise it would still feel amazing!"
"I know dildos can feel amazing!" Layla giggled. "I dunno, it wouldn't be the same."