"I feel ridiculous. People are looking at me. Give me the coverup back, and then I'll take the walk."
"No can do, Steph, and people looking at you is the whole idea. You look amazing. If I were straight, I'd be bothering the hell out of you."
"How did I get myself into this? I haven't worn a bikini since elementary school. I'm like 80% naked."
"Because we both agreed that you need to get laid."
"You mean because I was drunk."
"Drunk and horny. Very horny, like...it was sad. Like, if I had a vagina, I wouldn't have felt safe around you."
"You really know how to build a girl up, Nate."
"I don't think you understand how easy it is for someone like you to find a hookup."
"Ugh, is that really what I want?"
"Are you ready to give your whole heart and soul to a new relationship?"
"No. I'd just be comparing them to Michelle."
"And, are you still so sexually frustrated that you can barely concentrate on anything but tits and ass at work?"
"That statement was coerced out of me."
"Honey, I didn't even ask."
"Well, Jose Cuervo did most of the coercion, but I wasn't the one pouring the drinks."
"Enough talk, Sweetie. You walk that sexy body down the beach and see if anyone catches your eye. If you've caught their eye, too, then find a reason to talk to them. It isn't rocket science."
"You come with me. I don't know what to look for. I don't know what to say. I was with Michelle since puberty. I've never even tried to flirt with someone. How am I going to suddenly go fishing for sex?"
"Take a breath. Finding a casual partner was your idea, and when I asked Naomi, she said this was her favorite way to find hookups before she met Natalie. She'd just look for a woman alone, one bag, one towel, one book, and just a little too put together to get in the water."
"But, Naomi is like super-hot."
"And so are you. That bikini is perfect."
"Like you would know."
"Hey, I'm gay, not blind. What can it hurt to just walk down and back one time? If there isn't anyone that interests you, then we can go hang out with Jose while you drool over an Amy Adams movie...again."
"That information was also coerced. I think me and Jose need to keep our distance for a while. Loose lips sink ships"
"Loose lips are probably what..."
"Stop right there. Don't you finish whatever nasty shit you're about to say."
"I would go with you if I could, but I can't. You wouldn't look very single or very lesbian walking down the beach with a guy."
"Nate, your nickname is 'Big Gay Nate'. People can tell you're gay from space."
"Then they'll think you brought your gay friend to keep guys away from you."
"Ugh, alright. It was my idea, and I am struggling with this whole celibate lifestyle. Once down and back, and then I'm putting the coverup back on and we're out of here."
"Unless you don't make it that far."
"What would I even say? How do you start a conversation with someone that you want to end with sitting on their face?"
"Ask for help with something, or directions. I've got it. Ask for directions to the concession stand."
"There is no concession stand."
"That's why you can't find it."
"That's dumb."
"Okay, then ask her to take a picture or about her book or where she got her swimsuit. Just start talking, your body will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you."
"I still feel ridiculous parading myself around like this."
"It's hard to catch fish without bait. Not everyone finds 15-year relationships without looking like you did."
"I guess."
"Honey, I'm 30 years old, I've never made it one year."
"Sure, but you're a slut."
"My sex life is not the issue we are here to remedy."
"I know. I'm just intimidated by the whole thing."
"I understand, but your vibrators are going to start a union if you make them work any more hours."
"Very funny. Alright. Here I go."
_____________________
Stephanie felt unsteady, like she didn't know how she was supposed to walk. The sand was hot, and she was barefoot, so she moved down where the sand was wet. The beach was fairly narrow which meant that she could still see everyone from the water's edge. Unfortunately, in her mind, that also meant everyone could see her. She was, after all, between them and the ocean they came to see, but after a few minutes, she didn't feel like she stuck out much.
There was plenty of flesh showing on a warm sunny day. Plenty of carefully chosen bikinis and shirtless men sucking in their guts, but she still saw the eyes on her. Mostly it was the male gaze that seemed to follow her everywhere, but this day it was paired with many disapproving female faces as well. Not exactly what she had hoped for when she drunk shopped for a "woman-catching" bikini.
Some of the disapproving looks were probably from a level of jealousy, but she felt like more of them were for drawing their men's eyes. Stephanie was not vain or self-centered, but she was perfectly aware that most people considered her attractive, or more often "hot", whatever that meant. She wished she could tell these women that the lingering gaze of their husbands was one of her least favorite things in the world, but she didn't really know if that would make the ladies feel better or worse. "Dogs", she said to no one, shaking her head.
Stephanie was no coward. She would finish the scan of the beach that she had agreed to, but she felt just plain silly. She was on display, mostly nude, fishing for a woman, and...
well...
she spotted one.
Most of the way up the beach, under the protective shade of an umbrella, was a pale skinned curvaceous redhead in a black two-piece. She was alone. She was on the only towel near her, her hair was gently curled like she had done it with a flat iron (not swimming today), and she had one large beach bag next to her. Propped up on her left elbow reading, her hips were so highlighted and enticing that Stephanie didn't realize she was staring at them. Until, she realized the redheaded woman was looking back at her.
Stephanie panicked and looked straight ahead, picking up the pace. She was 90% sure that she was actually licking her lips when she was caught staring at the way those full pale thighs rose up to the seam of the black bottoms. A seam that then formed a triangle pointing like an arrow between her legs.
"What the hell am I doing?" She began an animated conversation with herself, talking with her hands like some stunningly beautiful lunatic. "This won't work. I can't just go pick a girl up on a whim. Maybe this worked for Naomi, but I'm just getting sneers from most of these women. Oh, and plenty of dicks pointed my way. I could skip the ocean and swim in a sea of dicks if I wanted. Lucky me. Well, at least I've hit the end so I can go back and tell Nate I won the bet and he owes me dinner."
When Stephanie turned around, she stopped dead in her tracks. She had caught the redhead watching her. She must have been at least fifty yards away, but she was sitting up with her book closed in her lap with her neck craned high staring right at Stephanie. After she had been caught, the redhead was playing it off, staring down at her book which had probably been opened to an arbitrary page. Stunned, Stephanie seemed rooted to her spot trying to figure out if this silly idea had actually born fruit. The woman checked out of the corner of her eye to see if she had indeed been caught watching Stephanie stroll down the beach. When it was confirmed, she closed the book, made distant eye contact, and gave a small wave with an "oh well" smile.
Stephanie's feet began drifting her toward the alluring woman. They had both been caught leering at each other. There was no point in trying to hide her direction of travel. She marched straight at her, wondering why a redhead who needs to hide from the sun came to the beach at all. It seemed a silly thing to do unless, she hoped, she came here for the same reason Stephanie did.
The other woman stayed put on her towel and kept a welcoming smile on her face while Stephanie approached. Once she arrived, Stephanie realized she had forgotten to come up with some contrivance to begin a conversation. In a panic, she just said, "Uhm, nice umbrella."
The woman snickered. It was perhaps the most poorly conceived pick-up line she had ever heard, but it was so adorable that it may have also been the best. "Thank you, would you like to have a seat with me?"
"I would, thank you."
"My name's Emma. I'm sorry if I was staring, but you look incredible in that bathing suit."
"It's okay. I mean it's more than okay. I was glad."
"Really? Glad is good."
"Besides, I'm pretty sure you caught me staring first."
"I'm pretty sure I did, too."
"What are you reading? Oh, and I'm Stephanie by the way. Steph if you'd like."