The events that I now reminisce about occurred one winter, and spring, a few years back and they changed my life. My hometown is not a large one so it is common to see the same people who frequent the neighborhood regularly. A small group of my co-workers with would often meet at the town bars, and other local events, for some drinks and to unwind. Although I was a woman who was not attracted to men, in our group I was never harshly judged for my sexual preferences. To be honest I think most of the guys in the group found it alluring, perhaps secretly fantasized about conquering the dyke. Also, of course, there was the ever-present male fantasy of joining me, and one of my love interests, for an evening's activities. I didn't have the heart to tell them that my life was far more boring than theirs. You see, while there was no ill will towards me, there was a distinct shortage of women who would be interested in more than a friendship.
Although I had managed to have a couple of brief encounters to reinforce my preferences, I had found small town America not to be a sexual hot spot, if you are a woman who likes women. The best I could do was let my tastes be known and see if any girl showed interest. That is how I handled it until the first time I saw her, a woman that I couldn't get out of my mind. She was so different that I was willing to take chances.
It was the company Christmas party when I was told that Brent was going to be bringing the girl he had been seeing for some time, and traveling an hour to another town to do it. Some of the guys had been going on about how she was suppose to be a knockout, but that could not be possible since she was with Brent. We had known Brent since high school and he had always been a bit of an ass. The type who was all talk but never seemed to accomplish much. We all still forgave him, like one would forgive an annoying little brother.
Partway into the evening they arrived, and indeed most were envious of Brent when they met the girl he introduced as Cindy. She was wearing a heavy sweater and snow pants because he had been showing her the area on snowmobile, and our employers were too cheap to provide enough heat to necessitate taking them off. Due to the heavy clothes I could not tell what her figure was really like, but it was obvious that she was petite. I guessed her at around 26 years old. Then I got a good look at that face. It was the face that would change my life. She had the creamiest skin and the prettiest long blonde hair I had ever seen, but it was her eyes that clinched it. Her eyes were large, almond shaped, and the most mesmerizing blue. There was a sweet innocence in them that could probably get any man to do anything. She was the life of the party that night. Trying not to beat myself up with something I could never know, I dared not spend too much time around her.
At one point I did manage to talk with her a bit and found her mannerisms and voice to be tuned exactly to my weaknesses. This woman was getting to me, but it wasn't long before Brent walked up and interrupted.
"Gary and Meg want to show you something," he said as he pulled her away. "Besides, I have to worry more about Andrea here trying to take you home than any of the guys."
I tried not to let my face show the pain that his intentional blow had inflicted. When they got a few more steps away I could see him whispering to her and then she turned back to give me that puzzled look. As I was thinking of how negative her reaction might be, I noticed a brief and kind smile cross her face as she turned away.
After her introduction, Cindy started coming to our town much more often and eventually started spending as much time with some of the other women in town as with Brent. This appeared to be creating some tension with them and the cracks began to show on Brent's little trophy case. She had related to her new friends that Brent was actually a little less libidinous than he led us all to believe, and seemed a bit intimidated by her, since they had rarely done more than make out. I had wished this had been kept quieter. Not for Brent's sake, he needed a little deflating, but because I got to hear all of the guys fantasies about satisfying her. It was not that I didn't have some of those same fantasies, but I started to feel an odd protective streak toward her and hated to hear the disrespectful tone of the talk.
As spring came, lighter clothing became more common and when I finally got a good look at her I was speechless. I had seen her in blue jeans already and her stunning little butt looked like it had been carved from stone by a master, but when the tighter shirts and shorts came out, she was awesome to behold. By then Brent had lost her and it seemed that none of the other men in town could entice her. She appeared happy just to hang out with us, and sometimes stay late drinking with the girls.
One such night we had all gathered at a friend's house like schoolgirls giggling into the night and drinking wine. Of course the conversation went to sex, and as the giggling increased, I noticed eyes looking uncomfortably toward me. Then finally Joan, the loud mouth of the group, broke the tension.
"Don't anybody flatter yourselves, Andrea has better taste than what anybody here has to offer!"
It was bold enough to break the tension and start the laughter again, but I couldn't help but find my gaze going to Cindy to gauge her reaction.
"Come on Andrea, we always figured you were holding out on us with Eric. You two spent so much time together we figured one of you had to be tempted."
I had to set the record straight, although I couldn't deny all temptations, that was a special case, and also another story.
"Are you kidding?" I replied, " I grew up in their house. He was like a brother! But I can tell you how he looked naked!"
The giggling erupted uncontrollably and continued until most had left. Later that night fortune found me on the front porch talking with the object of my desires. After some small talk she said that she had felt bad about the way Brent had talked to me, and about me. Then her curiosity seemed to get the better of her when she started asking how I coped so well with situations like the one that night. She even asked if I have ever been with a man. I told her that I had not been with many people period, but had tried dating some men out of desperation, when I was younger. But none of the guys in this town had what it took to tempt me. She told me that she had not been very experienced herself and that she was still looking for the right person.
"I think it will be a man though," she joked and then added, "Though I think the right person just has to be somebody you care about, to give and receive real pleasure."
I felt the last part was probably added to comfort me in my alienation throughout the evening. But with her I never knew. She so attracted me that I lost all nerve in her presence, and felt I could never be so bold as to suggest anything that could assault that purity which she exuded. I took no chances here. I was better off with my fantasies than risking that kind of disruption of this reality. But despite this, that reality was inevitably disrupted latter on that spring.
It was in April, at a town picnic, when a bunch of us all gathered together and played softball, and had too much to drink. I always stayed a little more sober; I had enough controversy without being a drunk as well. Late that night, Brent got worked up over something and finally let loose on Cindy. She had drunk a little too much as well and, after the bit of commotion, she had vanished from the crowd. Nobody seemed to have seen her leave, but I had. I walked down the trail she had taken near the creek and found her there, not far from where the parks brook emptied in. She had been crying and was sitting on the bank tossing stones into the water. I asked if she was all right and she said she just needed to get away for a while. This led into conversation about her friends in town and why she enjoyed it here so much. She reveled herself to be a more lonely person than I would have believed, and she had found the new people here to be a fresh start for her.
She continued to fascinate me. This girl, who seemed so vulnerable and innocent, concealed a wisdom and strength that Brent would not have wanted to take on, if he understood it. She was of course a little tipsy that night, but this allowed her to reveal these many facets to me. She mentioned that she wished she could have played ball since she really liked the caps we had printed up. I took mine off, placed it on her head and told her she could have it. In a very sincere tone she thanked me and leaned in to hug me. When I retuned the embrace she surprised me with a joking comment.
" Don't try too much with me, it has been some time. Brent came after a long dry spell and I doubt he could have helped much if he tried," she said, and then laughed with me.
When our giggling subsided I told her that I wouldn't dare since she was well out of my league. That is when it happened. She lifted her head and looked into my eyes and kissed me. It was soft and halfhearted, but for a split second I got a sense of the tiger that lay below her surface when she lightly took my lower lip in her teeth. Then it was over, and she backed away.
"I'm sorry!" she said "I shouldn't have done that to you."
Quickly she was on her feet and going back to the crowd. I just sat there, dumbfounded trying to comprehend what had just happened. When I got back to the festivities, they said she had left. My world was a much more unstable and darker place. In one instant I had a dream come true and the next all of my hopes were destroyed.
Cindy didn't come back after that and I knew I had to accept it. I couldn't understand what had happened, but I had to accept it. I tried to get her out of my mind and go about my life. Then in mid May we had an early heat wave and I decided to have all the gang over to my place on a Saturday night. Things were going fine and I thought I would finally have a good time, when I turned and saw her at the door. She was in all her glory that night. Her silky blonde hair was in a ponytail pulled out the back of the ball cap I had given her. A white t-shirt accentuated perkier breasts that most women only dream of having. Then and a pair of pink terry cloth shorts that formed to all of her contours. She didn't seem to notice me, but I couldn't help but notice her, nobody could. Her flat tummy was only interrupted by a beautiful fleshy mound that protruded to form the top of a well-defined ridge descending between her sensuous legs.