Chapter One
"Well, at least it's a nice place." The words slipped out as I sipped my wine. They weren't particularly loud, but still.
I glanced around quickly and sighed in relief when no one in the restaurant reacted. I guess they were all too busy enjoying their meals to care. Either that or they were so caught up in the holiday season that they didn't notice.
More likely, they were just too tired to react. The combination of Thanksgiving and Black Friday took a lot out of most people. In either case, the whole situation was embarrassing enough without me being caught talking to myself. I was on edge and knew it, but I had good reason.
I was on my first blind date. Well, almost anyway. This Billy guy would have to actually show for it to be official. I still couldn't figure out how I let Janet convince me to let her set me up. She was my former college roommate and my best friend, but still, a blind date? At my age? Twenty-five was way too old to be going on your first blind date!
That's what I told Janet too. Her response? First, she reminded me that I wasn't quite twenty-five yet and then she argued that the opposite was true. My best friend insisted that the older you got the more likely you were to go on a blind date. Her logic made sense, but honestly, the idea of blindly meeting with more and more strangers as the years passed was too depressing to think about.
"Breathe," I said softly to myself, trying to relax by taking another sip from my second glass of wine. My stomach was empty so I needed to pace myself, but the whole situation had me more than a little uncomfortable.
The fact that I was turning twenty-five in a few weeks didn't help. My friends insisted it was still young, but it didn't feel that way to me. I was turning a quarter of a century. Almost a third of my life was gone.
I glanced around the restaurant to try and distract myself from feeling old. The holiday decorations were abundant this time of the year and impossible to ignore. Seeing them felt sort of like a mixed blessing. Thoughts of Christmas helped my mood a little because they reminded me that I was going home soon and would see my family, but they also made me feel lonely.
Thanksgiving was my first big holiday away from home. My family always celebrated together, but they lived across the country now and I'd decided it was too soon to go home after moving here only a few months ago.
It sounded reasonably at the time, but Thanksgiving by yourself in an apartment was not something I'd recommend if you weren't used to it. Can you say depressing?
Not that I regretted moving here. My new job was great. It kept me even busier than I expected, which I liked, but because of that I hadn't really had a chance to make many new friends. I think that was at least part of why I agreed to go on this blind date. It would be so much nicer to have someone in my life right now, especially with my birthday fast approaching.
It didn't help that my two older brothers were married by the time they turned twenty-five. Mom had mentioned the fact more than once in the last few months. I sometimes tried to throw her off by mentioning that my younger brother Sean was graduating college this year and would need to find someone soon, but it seldom worked.
I once tried to explain to her how people were getting married much older these days, but mom didn't understand. She came from a small town where most people married young. She hadn't out and out said it, but I'm pretty sure to her being female, twenty-five and unmarried made you a spinster. Which brought me back to another reason for this blind date. I was getting desperate.
Still, I don't think I would have done it if this Billy guy wasn't a longtime friend of Janet's. My best friend grew up in one of the nearby suburbs before traveling across the country to go to college. She'd planned on coming back after graduating, but found a job too good to pass up.
Janet swore Billy was great. She started trying to set us up as soon as I settled in. I grilled her about him until she admitted that he was a bit odd, but in a good way. I wasn't sure what that meant. I tried to get her to explain, but my friend's answers were vague at best. Janet swore I'd like him if I just gave it a chance. I wasn't so sure.
On the other hand, what could it hurt? I had moved across the country for a new job a few months ago and I didn't know anyone here. Mom and dad were not thrilled when I told them I was going. They were the typical overprotective parents and didn't like the idea of my being alone. Truthfully, neither did I, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity. Besides, it was time I went out on my own.
I admit, it took some serious soul searching after one very long conversation with Janet for me to finally work up the courage to do it, but I had and I didn't regret it. Well, not most of the time, anyway. I should have gone home for Thanksgiving.
My company didn't give people off for Black Friday. It was the main reason why I'd decided not to go visit my family. I didn't want to request a day off so soon after joining the company. It turned out to be a mistake. The office was empty today with most people taking the day off.
It didn't help that those who did come in spent most of it talking about how much fun they had on Thanksgiving. Honestly, I even found myself getting a little jealous of the ones who complained about their families.
It's not like I hadn't expected the loneliness, but it got to me sometimes. I wasn't used to it. I had one of those close families. I mean, my mother complained when I decided to go to a school a whole three-hour drive away from home. My father didn't seem any happier, but honestly with him at least some of it was the school I chose.
Mom insisted I come home at least once a month and 'popped in' for a visit with my father or one of my brothers frequently enough for Janet to tease me about it. The funny part was that I remembered just how 'brave' I thought I was when I chose my university.
I had an inkling of just how sheltered I was growing up, but not the extent. College had been quite the eye opener. I wasn't remotely prepared for some of what I found at my extremely liberal college. It was so alien to me that I would have been lost without Janet's help.
I was still on the conservative side despite the exposure I received, but I'd learned to accept that the world was a lot bigger and a lot different than what I was brought up to think. Of course, most of the differences didn't matter in my day-to-day life. I was who I was, and although college had changed how I viewed some things, it hadn't changed me, at least not in any significant ways.
That didn't stop me from enjoying the experiences and insights I gained while away at school. I had plenty of great memories. Most of them involved Janet. She was my best friend and I couldn't picture my life without her in it. I think the fact that it had worked out so well was at least partly the reason for me finding the courage to take this job and move away from home.
Unfortunately, it turned out moving across the country for a job was a lot different than going off to school. I liked my coworkers and had even gone out for drinks after work once or twice, but I didn't really connect with any of them.
Maybe it was because unlike in college, everyone here already had their friends, or maybe it was just what it was, but I figured that even if this Billie guy and I just ended up as friends that would be okay. I could use a new friend right about now.
I mean, if there was something more there that would be great, but I hadn't found a guy to hold my attention for more than a couple of months yet and at my age I was starting to think it would never happen. Which sort of brought me back to my original point. How did I let Janet talk me into this?
I suppose going on a blind date might be more fun than spending another night working, binge watching some television show or even worse, sitting through one of those Hallmark Christmas movies that I'd been getting sucked into recently. Then again, maybe not. A lot depended on the guy. He could be a loser or worse, a psycho. That's why these types of set ups were always so stressful. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
In the end, blind dates all came down to a matter of trust. I don't mean trusting the guy since you didn't know him by definition. I mean trusting the person who set you up, and the bottom line was that I trusted Janet. She was my closest friend despite the fact that we were nothing alike. She wouldn't have set me up with someone crazy or a loser.
Besides, worst case, at least I'd have a story to tell my friends and family. They were always pestering me to date more. Mom and dad had been trying to 'help' me find a husband for years now. It was annoying, but I understood. They just wanted me to be happy.
My parents loved being married and having kids. They assumed it was impossible for me to be happy unless I had the same. It's not like I didn't dream of having a family someday, but 'my knight in shining armor' hadn't come along yet so I found other ways to make myself happy. Frankly, by this point I was starting to accept that he might not exist.
It made me a little sad at times, but mostly I'd learned to accept it and focus on my career. As it turns out, I was pretty good at what I did. That made me happy. It frustrated me that my parents couldn't see it. Their constant pushing and setups were getting extremely old by the time I moved away.
To be fair, my parents' machinations worked out well for my older brothers. They were both happily married and I know for a fact that my parents introduced my oldest brother Mike to his wife Tammy. I think mom also had something to do with Paul meeting Cheryl too, but she never admitted it. Tammy was currently pregnant with her their second child. Paul and his wife had just had their first a few months back.
I hated disappointing my parents. On the other hand, even they didn't want me to settle for someone I didn't love. Well, they hadn't so far. I was a little concerned that that might change in a few years.
Mom had taken to trying to set me up with some of her friends' single sons just before I left, but I knew most of them since we were kids and there was nothing there. I refused to let her set me up on a blind date with the few I didn't know because I hated to get her hopes up. Besides, it made me feel desperate...and yet, here I was allowing Janet to do the exact same thing.
