White Lady Overcomes Inner Racist

My name is Jessica Brideshead and by my own admittance I've got major issues. Simply put, I think I am a bigot. I can finally admit it now. I am not fond of people of color. It has to do with growing up in the city of Montreal, Province of Quebec. Most of the White folks living there are racist and don't hide it. That's our nature as Quebecers I'm afraid. However, like any decent human being, I aspire to be a better person. I don't want to be a racist anymore. My new psychiatrist, Dr. Jamal Etienne, is helping me with my issues. He says the only way to cure an uptight White female of her racism is with a hard dose Black authority and realism to shake up her world view. I think his treatment is working wonders.

At first, I resisted the good doctor with everything in me. The idea that a Black guy with University degrees could change the way that I as a White woman viewed the world seemed laughable to me. I refused to acknowledge that Black folks could possess wisdom or knowledge. At least that's how I felt at first. Of course, I played along and acted all nice around the good doctor. I just wanted him to declare me fit to return to proper Canadian society. That was my plan. I didn't count on the good doctor's ability to transform my views. I didn't think a Black man could change who I am as a White woman living in a White-dominated country built on the blood of innocent natives. I was dead wrong, on so many things. And I didn't even know it!

Every day, I come to Dr. Etienne's office and I explain to him how I feel. I work as a security guard in the city of Ottawa. There are lots of Black men and Black women on the security team where I work. I find it hard to deal with because I am a Quebecer and we don't adapt well to change. That's why many years ago the men and women of the province of Quebec tried to leave the Confederation of Canada. We failed. And we've been grumpy ever since. Us Quebecers are desperately trying to hang onto the past while the rest of Canada is moving forward. The basic identity of a Quebecer is that of a grumpy, uptight and extremely narrow-minded person. The rest of Canada mocks us as deliberately obtuse. Oh, well. We are who we are.

Dr. Etienne listens pensively to my spiel about my life in the province of Quebec and how it has shaped my views of the world. The tall, good-looking Black man is extremely wise. He holds a Ph.D. from Concordia University and has taught at universities across Canada as well as in the States and even in Europe. I am fortunate to have him as a psychiatrist. The government of Canada sent me to his practice after I got caught spraying racist graffiti on the wall of a Haitian neighbourhood in North Montreal. I did three months in prison and had to pay a hefty fine as well as undergo a psychiatric evaluation for my hate crime. The world-famous Haitian psychiatrist agreed to see me partly because he's writing a book about racism in Canada. He thought I'd make good subject material.

Slowly, the good doctor began to break me down. He began educating me about the world and its hidden history. Through him I learned that Black men and Black women in ancient Africa were the fathers and mothers of human civilization rather than the naked savages that European historians made them out to be. Civilization began in the Kingdom of Kush, located in present day Sudan. The Kingdom of Kush was eventually renamed Nubia by its people. The Nubians brought civilization to Egypt and gave primitive Egyptians knowledge of mathematics and science, along with the Pharaonic system. For a long time, Black Pharaohs from the Kingdom of Nubia ruled over ancient Egypt. European scientists are just beginning to discover the remnants of the great civilizations which arose in the Kingdom of Nubia, located in the Republic of Sudan in deep Africa. I was blown away by that revelation. Like most White folks living in North America, I actually believed the myth that White folks were superior and that people of color were somehow made to serve us. The doctor forever shook up my world view. And he had amazing books and artefacts to back up his claims. Slowly, I began to see the error of my ways.

It seemed that there was so much I didn't know about the world. The doctor took me for a walk around North Montreal, home of much of Canada's Haitian community. I am not going to lie. The thought of walking through these Black neighbourhoods made me uneasy. However, with the doctor as my guide, I felt safe. He took me to Haitian churches, Haitian restaurants and Haitian clubs. I saw these remarkable Black men and Black women in their natural element, living their lives. You know what? The impossible actually happened. Slowly but surely, I began to see people of colour, especially Haitians, as people. They were good, bad and everything in between. Most of them were decent, hard-working and family-oriented people. I don't know exactly how this change came over me but it happened. I now see the error of my ways. I see the sins of White men and White women. I also see people of colour, especially Haitians, as infinitely kinder, braver and more forgiving than White men and White women will ever be. If we had endured what they endured, we'd still be vengeful and cruel. They don't waste their time hating today's White people for the actions of yesterday. They move on. They live. They love. They work. They do their own thing. I was in awe of these people.

Once I realized that, I had to do something. I couldn't live in Canada, a country built on the backs of Aboriginals with the forced labour of innocent Africans. I moved to Haiti, and relinquished my Canadian citizenship. I learned to speak Haitian Creole. I got a job as a translator of documents for a Haitian businessman named Jean-Paul in the city of Cap-Haitien, Haiti. That was in 2004. Six years later, I am fully fluent in Haitian Creole. I am happily married to a gorgeous Haitian man named Joseph Mercier. We have two sons and a daughter together. I am a proud citizen of Haiti. When the quake of January 2010 happened, I was with my family in Cap-Haitien. The U.S. and Canadian troops offered to send me back to Canada. I said hell no. I am a proud citizen of Haiti. My place is with my people, the Haitians. I see myself as a Haitian woman, and a wife and mother first. I don't think of myself as a White woman. I think of myself as a Haitian woman. And I cannot thank Dr. Etienne enough for putting me on the right path and saving my soul.