I awoke from my nap to find Bill had already risen, I went out to the kitchen. Bill was at the table sipping a coffee, I poured a cup, "What's the matter Bill?"
"I don't know."
"You look perplexed."
"I don't know how to explain it."
"Well start with how you feel."
"I still love you Dani and seeing you fuck Dan last night got me excited and jealous at the same time."
"I found it exciting seeing you watching."
"That's not what I am trying to get at."
"What then?"
"You, the pregnancy, Dan, Have I lost you?"
"Bill you are a kind man, I was stupid, I still want you in my life."
"You had unprotected sex, What about disease?"
"I've been tested and they were negative."
"That's good, What about after you give birth? Your allergic to the pill."
"I'm enjoying what has happened and am sorry I hurt you in the process, I want to continue with my new sexual awakening."
"Is Dan the father?"
"No, The father is one of the prisoners."
"What?"
"It happened during a blackout, I was seduced trapped in a hallway."
"You could lose your job."
"I know so don't tell anyone. I told you because I love you still and I want to be honest."
"So does he know?"
"Yes he has a right to know."
"What does he think?"
"I don't know I got reassigned to surveillance right after scheduling maternity leave."
"You will see him when you go back to work."
"He will be released a couple months after I return."
"Is he going to be part of the babies life."
"I left that up to him. I let myself get seduced so I can't really blame him."
"You've given this a lot of thought."
"Yes, but I still do not know how you truely feel about it all."
"I don't know that is what has me stumped jealous, excited, pleased, sad, mad, I just don't know."
I got up and gave Bill a hug, "I hurt you and I'm sorry. If you want nothing to do with me I will have to accept it."
"I just don't know right now."
"I will give you time to sort your feelings out. Just remember that I want you in my life and again I'm sorry for hurting you."
Bill decided to go home to his apartment to sort out his feelings. I started to cry after he left, I could tell by the look in his eye that he loved me but felt betrayed by what I had done.