March 14, 2025
I can't stop thinking about the night I spent at Wren's. Everything I did with Wren and Jamal feels like it's been burned into my brain somehow. I can't stop thinking about it. I have to wonder if Wren gave me something different in that potion? I brought it home with me but I have yet to give it to David. I have no idea how to even approach this with him, and I don't want to just slip it into his drink like I'm drugging him.
I keep thinking about Jamal and Wren, how they just went at it like that, in front of me! With no shame or hesitation, just like that! I asked Wren about it afterwards and she said that she and Jamal were fuck buddies as well as roommates. It's a weird concept to think about, someone you don't really romantically like but you're still willing to have sex with anyway? I don't even know that much about Jamal, but I also don't think I'd mind doing more with him too. Though that's really awful to say. I love my boyfriend, David is a good guy, I don't want to hurt him and
SO
much of what happened that night
HAD
to be the potion I drank. I wouldn't have acted like that if I wasn't so magically horny! That's all it was, I'm sure. Even still, it was the most intense sexual experience I've ever had. So much about this feels kind of wrong. And the worst part is that I'd like to do it all over again, if I had the choice. I haven't spoken to Wren since I left her apartment this morning, Jamal wasn't even there that I could see. I'm a little scared to ask if we can do it again, I don't want to cheat on David, but I can't stop thinking about what happened and how hot it was. I keep thinking maybe I should just text her Wren texted me.
She wants me to come back over again tomorrow night. Is it wrong that I'm excited by this? I told her I could come over tonight or tomorrow and now she wants me to come over tonight. She said Jamal will be there still so we can see him again and he can do that kind of stuff again. She said he'd like me to do more than just blow him. It feels so wrong to want to do that, but David doesn't really touch me the way he did, there was a roughness to his touch that David doesn't have. I don't know why I'm so turned on by it but I am. I have a
boyfriend!
I shouldn't want another man! I haven't even been able to ask David to drink the tincture yet. But at the same time I keep wondering what the rest of him would feel like in other places on my body.
I told David I was going over for a study night with a friend and then spending the night with my parents. I feel so awful for lying to him, but I think maybe if I just do that with Jamal one more time maybe I can get all these feelings out of my system and go back to focusing on David.
Stepping into the apartment again, Wren smiled and let in the nerd, who had decided to forego the sweater schoolgirl look she had worn the night before. Instead she was wearing something slightly less formal, just a t-shirt and a pair of jeans, though she still had on those braided pigtails and those nerdy glasses. Coming inside, she looked around the apartment and didn't see Jamal on the couch like before. Wren noticed her wandering eyes and let her hand pat her shoulder, "Come on, let's get you set up in my room like before." She said, leading her to her bedroom again. As they passed by Wren's altar, she noticed the little plate had something on it, it looked like a heart-shaped candy, the kind you find on Valentine's day. She was a little confused but didn't say anything as she headed into Wren's room to set herself up.
The night before when they had shared a bed together, in the aftermath of it all, there was an undeniably awkward air that Alexis seemed to feel much more than the older girl. Wren had made a pillow barrier for her to feel comfortable, only to wake up to Alexis cuddling it the next morning. She didn't bother to make one tonight, "There we go," She put Alexis's pillow down on the bed, the same side she had slept on before, "If you want something to snuggle, I promise I don't bite." Wren said with a little wink. She was smirking but she noticed that the nerdy girl didn't bother to flirt back. Her smile fell as she looked at her, "You okay?"
"I just..." Alexis held her sleeping back to her chest a little tighter, "I don't want to cheat on my boyfriend." Wren was quiet for a moment, waiting to see if there was more she wanted to say. Alexis didn't really want to further explain herself, but she couldn't ignore the urge to fill the silence between them, "I love David. Like, really. If he knew I was doing any of this, it would kill him."
"So don't tell him," Wren replied simply, "I won't tell him if you won't. But make sure you tell that to Jamal. He really likes taken girls. It'll make him that much more into you."
"Really?" Alexis's eyes lit up for a second before she quickly reeled herself back in, disgusted with herself that she got so excited at the idea of making herself more attractive to Jamal, "I-I mean-! I don't want to do this!" Wren's head tilted curiously.
"Then why did you agree to come over?" She asked.
"I..." Alexis's grip on her sleeping bag tightened again, "I just... need to get this stuff out of my system. I'm frustrated because David's moving a little too slow and that's my own fault for feeling that way. I just need to do whatever it is we're going to do tonight and then I won't come back so don't invite me over."