This is another story of mine, previously published which I've decided to share here.Hope you all enjoy :)
© 2013 by S. C. Edward.
All rights reserved. No part of this document may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without prior written permission of author. The characters appearing in this work are fictitious and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Please be advised that this tale includes detailed sexual situations, lack of condom usage, profanity and is not suited for readers under the age of 18. Intended for mature audiences only.
Foreword
This story is dedicated to an unknown ex-convict I came across on the train one day, a few years ago. He had an outburst on the train about not being given a chance to find employment, even though he had rehabilitated himself, and was out of prison. His story inspired me to write this. The situations in this story will include adult themes, and are intended for mature audiences.
Chapter One
He'd lost it all. Mark's only link to the outside world was now dead. His mother had recently passed away, and he was left all alone. He was forgotten. No one he knew while he was free bothered, or cared to contact him.
Life in prison was rough. He always had to be on guard, never knowing who would attack him next, or what new problems would arise. He had to portray himself as a tough character, because no one respected weakness. It was a savage environment, and before his mother's passing, he promised her that he would survive.
To make it out of prison, and live was his only goal. During his first years there, Mark made a name for himself amongst the other inmates. To establish his reputation, he had to take down so many who challenged him.
Now no one even dared to look his way anymore. He was 26 now, and had survived almost five years behind bars. Many thought his death imminent in such a dangerous place, but he had proven them wrong. His mother had given him hope.
She was the only positive thing in his life when she was alive. She had forgiven him for all his mistakes and was truly a good woman. He wept in secret and silence when she passed. Of course he remembered his promise, but he had no idea how weak he was without her.
She was his backbone through all this. All of the fighting and alliances that he'd made to preserve himself; they were all done in hopes to make up for being a bad son.
He had been a nuisance to her before he was locked away and it was something that still weighed on his mind. Now that she was gone, what else was there? No other family, no ex-girlfriends and no buddies. His thoughts turned to killing himself or better yet letting some other inmate do it for him.
Sometimes at night in the dark of his cell, when there was nothing left to do but give in to his thoughts, he would wonder whether he should go on. What good would it be if no one else could accept him? His kind was shunned by society. No matter how minor or major his offense, he would be stamped a convict.
He knew this title alone was unsettling. People were conditioned to fear what they didn't understand. The world was a cold place with no sense of empathy as far as he was concerned, and his sins would forever be written on his sleeve. No one would look past them and see a man who struggled every day of his life.
He managed to hold up for the next few weeks, even though underneath it all he was crumbling. Fear and loneliness were beginning to take a strong hold and he was losing sight of having any kind of life outside prison walls.
Dr. Benjamin Benson, an instructor who taught an English course at the prison noticed Mark's rapid fall into depression. The retired college professor had taken a liking to Mark and hoped to help him. He knew that Mark had the potential to live a good life despite his shortcomings. One afternoon, Dr. Benson held him back after the class was over.
"Can I talk to you son?"
"Uh about what sir?" Mark said with a look of confusion.
"Is something bothering you? You've been looking very distracted lately. Are you worried about something?"
"I'm fine."
"With your release coming soon, I thought you'd be much happier son. How much time do you have left?"
"Six months."
"You don't look happy about that. Do you have family waiting for you?"
"No sir...not...anymore."
"Oh... I'm really sorry son." the professor replied remorsefully, as he realized why his pupil had such sad eyes.
"My mom passed away three weeks ago."
"I know how hard this must be for you, and I'm sorry if I seemed insensitive just now."
"It's alright... we all got to go sometime right?" Mark said, forcing a smile.
"I was meaning to talk to you a while ago about something, but if this is a bad time we can always talk later. I'd hate to trouble you at such a difficult time."
"Well sir, I'm already here so you might as well tell me what's on your mind."
"Are you sure Mark? What I want to discuss will take a lot of thinking over."
"Go ahead."
"Well Mark, you see, I've noticed you and I think you have potential. You seemed to have a great interest in furthering your education. I wanted to make you an offer... maybe to get you off your feet once you leave here. My brother is opening a new business and is in need of a few good employees. Of course I can train you to fulfill the job requirements. All you need to do is take a computer course and I've been teaching one here for a few years. I start the course over in a few weeks... but I realize what you're going through right now. It's just something to think about... and don't worry. My brother has no problem with hiring you straight out of prison. He feels the same as I do...shit happens to everyone! We all deserve redemption Mark."
Mark couldn't help laughing at the professor's last few words. He had never expected to hear Dr. Benson speak so casually. He admired the old man and if there was anyone to look up to after his mother's death, it was Dr. Benson.
"I don't have to think about it sir. The answer's yes!" Mark said, smiling much easily this time.
"OK great! I was hoping that you would take the offer. I really want to see you succeed."
"You know, when my mom died I thought I was finished. I didn't have anything or anybody left... and fuck trying to get a good job! Uh...I mean I know how most people look at us and I've seen a lot of bad stuff. Nobody takes pity on us...you know?"
"Don't worry son. Just do your best and you will make your Mama proud in heaven."
Mark found a new source of hope. He still felt a little lost without his mother, but at least he had something to look forward to when he got out. His respect for Dr. Benson had grown and he felt blessed to be given such a great chance. He was not going to waste it.
With the little internet time he was given, he spent all of it reading and studying. Now that he had something to apply himself to, dealing with his grief would be much easier. He didn't want to be sitting still, thinking about what a failure he had been to himself and his mother. He had always been physically strong, but the bombardment of these negative thoughts might have truly been the death of him.
The next six months went by quickly. Mark excelled in the courses and impressed the professor greatly. Dr. Benson escorted him out of prison on his last day and set him up at a motel for the night. He had gained enough knowledge to start working in the next two weeks and everything seemed to be falling into place.
He spent his first night of freedom indoors. He had adapted to living in cold cramped up cells and sleeping in an almost fetal position. He'd almost forgotten what a soft bed felt like. No longer would he have to worry about men stealing from him or attacking him while he slept.
For the first time in years he felt comfortable and safe. He owed all of this to the professor and made a vow to himself that very night. He would do all that he could to meet the expectations of Dr. Benson and his brother. Not many people were given a second chance and he would repay the professor for being a faithful man.
He tried to sleep but this new-found sense of comfort led his thoughts elsewhere. He hadn't been with a woman in years. His mind wandered to the images of all his exes and he was immediately turned off. They had always been the perfectly slender and vain type.
Not once had they gotten to know who he truly was and only wanted what material things he had. He'd been burned too many times by them and couldn't get a hard-on no matter how hard he tried. He knew that he shouldn't judge women only by their appearances, but he just couldn't get it up.
For the time being he stroked himself under the covers. He didn't have a specific woman in mind, but it occurred to him that he had a movie channel service at the motel. He turned on the TV and clicked on the first X-rated movie channel he found. It featured the same type that he didn't want. Next channel.