"Mona, come to bed, I just put our son Jacob to sleep, come on," says my husband Alain Dewar, speaking from the bedroom of our townhouse located in the East End of Toronto. I'm sitting on the couch, wearing an old hooded sweatshirt that Alain loaned me. He's had it since his days as a University of Toronto student. It's way too big for me. Underneath it, I'm only wearing panties and socks. Casual wife and momma, that's me.
"Just a minute," I reply, and I lower the volume on the television set, where CBC News is doing a report on the plight of Coptic Christians, many of whom have settled in Canada after fleeing persecution in Egypt. This bit of news strikes a chord within me, for I am an Egyptian woman and a Coptic Christian. According to the Canadian Coptic Association, there are thirty thousand of us in Canada, and our numbers are growing. This does bring a smile to my face...
When people hear of religious discrimination, they usually think of Islamophobia, as in the fear and hatred that a lot of people in the West have for Muslims. They never think of people like me, the Coptic Christians of Egypt, who have been marginalized by the Muslim majority in our own homeland for centuries. Things have gotten even worse since the Arab Spring, and we're the frequent targets of radicals, simply because of our identity as Middle-Eastern Christians.
Today, my husband Alain Dewar and I live in the City of Toronto, Ontario. Our home happens to be the largest metropolitan area in all of Canada. The city is home to a truly diverse population, many of whom look like me. Lebanese, Syrians, Persians, Egyptians, and many other Middle-Easterners call Toronto home. Alain and I attend a local church with a diverse membership, a place where we can feel at home.
We tried our best at a previous church, the Antioch Church of Toronto, whose membership is primarily Arab-Canadian, but Alain and I were subtly and at times not so subtly made to feel unwelcome. It has to do with the fact that we are an interracial couple. I'm an Egyptian-Canadian woman, and my husband Alain is an immigrant from the island of Antigua. In Arab society, whether Christian or Muslim, interracial relationships are a big no-no for us ladies.
I still miss the Antioch Church of Toronto, where the priest, Antoine Suleiman, is a genuine Coptic Christian hailing from the City of Faiyum, Egypt. This was the man who baptized our son Jacob. Alain and I were conflicted about leaving, but the way the other church members treated us left us no choice. I love my husband Alain and won't subject him to such prejudice. We met at a campus ministry at the University of Toronto, shortly after I came to Canada. It was indeed love at first sight.
"Hola, que pasa? Do you know where the athletics building is?" those were Alain's first words to me. I was new to Canada in those days, as I said before, and after being granted asylum by the Canadian immigration authorities, I got myself a job as a cafeteria worker at the University of Toronto, a school I'd heard a lot about even back when I lived in Cairo.
"Sorry, brother, I don't speak Spanish, but I can show the athletics building, I'm going there," I replied, and I looked at the big and tall, dark-skinned young man who stood before me, and flashed him a smile. It's what I do when I am nervous. Alain has quite a presence, to say the least. He nodded and thanked me profusely, and we ended up walking together. As it turns out, we were going to the same place, the Campus Ministry Group at the University of Toronto.
"Sorry I addressed you in Spanish back there, I really thought you were from Latin America," Alain told me, as we walked into the meeting room of the Campus Ministry Group, located within the athletics complex. Alain and I had been talking while walking, and I learned that he was from the Caribbean, and even more of a newcomer to the campus than I was.
"Oh it's okay, Alain, I get that a lot, I'm not from Latin America, I just look like I'm from there, I am actually Egyptian," I replied, laughing at his honest mistake. Alain is the only person who can make me laugh, haunted as I am by my tragic past. When you've lost as much as I have, it's hard to appreciate the lighter moments in life. I had a good feeling about Alain, even at this first meeting. I guess fate truly had plans for us.
Alain and I joined the twenty or so other members of the campus ministry group, a hodgepodge of Latinos, Caribbean folk, Asians, and of course, white people. United by our Christian faith, and free to practice it in this wonderful nation called Canada. As I sat down, one of the group leaders, a young Jamaican woman named Stacy, talked about the meaning of Christianity in today's ever-changing world. If we are not careful Christianity could become extinct, I thought bitterly.
I remember those harrowing days when I was forced to flee my homeland of Egypt due to religious persecution and general unrest. Sometimes at night, I still have nightmares about the bloodshed I witnessed on the streets of Cairo, the city of my birth. This place claimed so many people I loved, including my parents, Mansour and Nora Gamal. How I wish they were still with us today.
"Mona, I fear that we are no longer safe in Cairo, we must leave Egypt," said my father, Mansour Gamal. I looked at my Baba, a tall, gaunt man with dark bronze skin and short dark hair that was graying at the temples, and sighed. Once upon a time, he was a captain in the Armed Forces of Egypt. Now, he was an outcast, having lost his post as a soldier, his rank and privileges, and the right to vote, simply because he converted to Christianity.