The thing about living in the Philippines is the people are friendly. I am on the younger end of the retiree scale at 45, and while not rich, I am comfortable. I did 20 years at a job with a retirement plan, so I did just that - walk away 3 years ago. No, fancy cars and big houses were not as important to me as peace and stress free life. I don't need much, and have made many friends here.
Now, my love life was never anywhere near as successful as my working career. I got close to getting married a couple of times, but I always woke up in time before making a mistake. Call me cynical, but everyone always wants something from you, and a couple of women I dated were really good at hiding it right up until they thought they had me.
So, that's how I came to this life still single. Let me tell you a huge secret. It's probably unethical to some. I have no such problem with my conscious. I never said I was a great guy.
I had a vasectomy at 35 years of age. Just after my second near marriage experience. I was starting over, and decided parenthood wasn't for me. How is that scandalous? I don't tell the women here. I found even one night stands are all to happy to see if they can get a mestizo baby. Who am I to rain of their parade? Believe me, a lot of women want a try.
So, the problem with having lots of friends here is everyone has a daughter, a niece or a cousin that is "just perfect" for me. On a side note, not that I was never offered, but I am not interested in young women. 35 is my hard limit, and that's still pushing it in my mind.
So today, I'm chillin on my balcony enjoying a non-rainy day, which has seemed rare lately in my little stretch of beach paradise I call home when my neighbors start having a party.
Alex, my friend and neighbor, sticks his head out of his balcony a floor below me and invites me down. Alex is notorious for never giving up finding me someone to warm my bed on a permanent basis. He thinks it's his duty to make me as miserable as all the other married men, I guess.
So, I grab a bottle of gin (always keep one around so you don't walk in empty handed), and meander on down there.
True to form, a couple "cousins" are in town, scouting for jobs. I swear, everyone in this country is related to him.
So, he trots out cousin number 1 and introduces her to me. Another Jasmine, go figure. Nice girl, about as interesting as watching paint dry though. I talk politely to her, but hopefully give off "the signal" that I'm not interested.
It's not that she isn't beautiful, just not a good idea to catch and release someone in the condo right below you who is staying with a good friend. Since I have no long term interest in her, it's best to just avoid the mess entirely.
Otherwise I just go about being my "charming" self to all the usual suspects. Alex's wife, and other women are in the kitchen, apparently cooking for the entire Filipino armed forces, and I wonder when they will show up.
The drinking table is going strong. I take two laps there, then surrender my seat to yet another cousin who is eager to join the adult club. He's at that age where he is still stuck in between adult and non-adult. I won't say child because he's like 19 years old, but Filipinos don't grow up as fast as Americans.
It's something he has to earn through responsible decisions and mature actions. Starting his first job had earned him a probationary acceptance into the drinking circle. I wish him luck as he takes my seat.
The noise and chatter are not unpleasant, but at my age I have to take a break from it more often, so I slip out to Alex's balcony. I nearly jump out of my skin when I notice someone sitting there very quietly in the corner. Surprised me a little.
She's not what Filipinos consider beautiful. She's dark tanned and a little skinny, but I think she's gorgeous. Her hair is long and we'll cared for yet she doesn't constantly fiddle with it like some women do.
She's no spring chicken, as I guess her at 31 or 32 max. I'm surprised when she speaks first. Filipinos aren't exactly known for being bold. Now, piss one off, and it's a different story, but foreigners usually make them shy. Usually no one that doesn't know me won't speak first.
Her voice is sweet and unbridled. I think it's the sound of someone who really doesn't care about my reaction, but still has manners to be polite.
"Hi. I'm Alex's friend Billy" I answered her initial salvo.
"Oh, the creep upstairs." She deadpans.
"I prefer eccentric pervert, but creep is not totally inaccurate." I respond, which makes her smile. She seems pleased that I knew she was yanking my chain.
"Reyna, the black sheep cousin." She fired back making me smile.
I take the seat next to Reyna, and she offers me a pour from her bottle of gin. I fish some ice pieces out of the cooler and accept the libation.
We chat about nothing in particular. I deduce she is cousin number 2, and wonder why Alex didn't introduce me to her. I'm not going to say she is smart, it's too soon to tell that, but her tongue is certainly nimble.
Being able to hold a conversation is a huge plus in my book. I don't need to talk about differential equations or dissect Nietzsche's thoughts on the meaning of existence, but a reply of more than one word or grunt is greatly appreciated by yours truly.
Eventually I wandered back inside, and was grabbed by the ear by Alex's wife Beth.
"Stay away from her. She's no good for you Billy." She scolded me before putting a plate of food in my hands. I looked at Alex, and he just shrugged. Karaoke started up after dinner, which was my cue to disappear back upstairs.
I woke up late the next day, and is my habit, I took my coffee out to my balcony. It will rain later, but for now it's nice. Humid, as always, but pleasant. I love the feel and smell of the ocean breeze.
I people watch. It's my favorite sport. I catch sight of Jasmine and Reyna sitting on the beach. Jasmine is wearing the official Filipina swimsuit - shorts and a tee shirt, while Reyna is wearing an actual swimsuit. Not a small one, but small enough I get confirmation that she is indeed as attractive as I first estimated.
It made me curious. I'm one of those idiots who will want to try things I was told not to do. Call it a character flaw, but it made me wonder why Beth, and by extension Alex, were trying to steer me away from her. It is just interesting because only a few minutes before they were pushing Jasmine on me.
I had errands to run, so I pushed it from my mind. Doing even simple tasks in the Philippines requires a lot of time. I don't have a car, preferring to use public transportation. While it's cheap, it is time consuming, but time is the one thing I have a lot of now.
It did make me think. After my errand, I stopped at a Honda dealer and looked at motor bikes. I hesitate to call them motorcycles, because they aren't, but they also aren't what we really call scooters either.
Probably a purchase I would make, but not today. My friend Oscar owes me a favor anyway. Foreigners don't get good deals here, but locals do. Pro tip for you. Always have a local make big purchases for you. Trade a favor or a small gift for doing it for you and it will save you a lot of money.
I got back to the condo in the evening, and went down to my favorite pub for dinner and a beer. As I said, people watching is fun to me. I have an interesting conversation with an Australian chap who is either a great story teller or lived an interesting life.
Alex messages me in the morning, asking me to help him buy a new toilet as he is remodeling his CR (comfort room), and I am a little handy.
We take his car to the building supply company, and on the way, I ask him about his cousin.
"So, what's the deal with your cousin?" I start.
"Oh, she is a nice girl Billy, and she thought you were guapo (handsome)." He replied.
