Lexxy Baby

IN THE PREVIOUS CHAPTERS:

Monique, a Personal Trainer and YouTube personality, walked in on her fiancé of three years in bed with another woman.

She took Trey's betrayal hard and went on an unplanned hiatus from men.

Eight months later, she met an Uber driver named Alexander after a night out with her best friend.

Monique was still recovering from heartbreak but felt a strange connection to this man who made her smile.

Nothing romantic, just an appreciation for him.

Their second encounter wasn't as pleasant.

He showed up at the gym she worked at, looking for a personal trainer.

Because his original trainer quit, she was the replacement.

But he didn't want to work out with a woman.

He requested a man for a reason.

She was offended by what she perceived as sexism, and the two had a falling out.

He left the gym in a huff, with her dismissing him from her life as another loser.

Yet, after talking with her big brother, she realized that she was presumptuous.

After finding his phone number, she disguised herself as a random representative of the gym to find out why he was quitting.

She found out the real reason he wanted a male trainer, and it had nothing to do with sexism.

He was just insecure about his body.

She apologized, and the two of them talked it out.

She even convinced him to give her a chance as his trainer.

That was the beginning of their friendship.

Monique looked forward to their workout sessions together.

They made each other laugh, and their personalities complemented one another.

Monique eventually got over her ex.

She even had a random one-night stand with a guy she met at a club.

His name was Craig.

It felt great to be liberated from Trey's grasp on her heart.

It was a celebration of that liberty.

The next day, however, reality set in.

She had a massive hangover and was drained of energy to do anything with her day.

After realizing there was nothing to do, she called Alex.

The two hung out outside the gym for the first time while watching Star Wars.

That became a thing for them over the course of the next few months.

They watched everything Star Wars related.

In that time, they got to know each other a little more.

As much as Alex wanted to deny the growing attraction he had for Monique, he couldn't.

His best friend Greg had a feeling that she was attracted to Alex too, but he was too jilted over a past experience to take the leap.

Summer Fitzgerald was that experience; the ghost that kept haunting him from high school.

She repeatedly broke his heart by keeping him in the background while she pursued "the bad boys".

She even used him as a bait and switch to trick her mom into letting her stay out late.

That was the last straw for Alex, and he hadn't tried to pursue another woman since.

But now, his heart -- and Greg -- was telling him to carpe diem.

So, he leaned in for kiss.

Unfortunately, he was rejected yet again.

Monique wasn't ready for that, at least not with him.

Right now, she just wanted his friendship.

Nothing more.

Alex took that pretty hard.

He renewed his vow to stay clear of romantic relationships and to keep Monique at a distance.

This hurt Monique, and the two had a long discussion about it.

Fortunately, they were able to re-emerge from that discussion as friends.

However, things took a turn the day before Monique's birthday.

The two celebrated it with an incredibly thoughtful gift from Alex, but there was an even bigger surprise waiting for her.

Alex had met someone new; a girl.

He was going out on a date with Cameron, a girl from his high school days.

Monique had to come to grips with this.

It was then that she realized that her feelings for Alex weren't just about friendship.

She wanted to date him.

So, she told him how she felt.

His reaction wasn't what she'd hoped for.

You see, Alex took everything into account.

His question was, why now?

What changed?

He wasn't willing to take that risk.

He'd become comfortable with the idea that MoLex was nothing more than a strong friendship.

They had a fight about that, and eventually fell out.

But the two of them found their way back to each other.

Monique offered Alex a surprising choice; one she would never offer anyone else.

"Date both of us."

She said to him.

She was willing to share him.

Alex, being who he was, couldn't do that.

It wouldn't be fair to either woman.

Unlike Trey, he wasn't a guy who could date multiple women.

But was that it, or was he just afraid?

Monique's feelings were growing for Alex; so much so that even her subconscious got in on it.

She found herself having sex dreams about him.

She'd wake up and find that she'd been masturbating in her sleep.

Alex, on the other hand, wanted to pretend that nothing had changed.

He was in a precarious predicament.

His mind told him to choose Cameron, but his heart belonged to Monique.

No matter how much he tried to shake that fact, it remained in right there in his face.

On the plus side, Alex finally got to meet Toni.

It was her birthday, so he hung out with her and Monique at a casino.

It was a fun night; that is, until Trey showed up.

Things became heated, and then became physical.

In a surprising turn of events, the fight ended with victor, though the victory came at a price.

He had to go to the ER to fix his hand.

That wasn't the only "physical' activity that took place.

The sexual tension had built to a crescendo, and lust exploded between them.

After some topless making-out, Monique led Alex to her bedroom...

And now, on to Chapter 8.

******************************************************

Alex had never seen the inside of Monique's bedroom before.

He'd been visiting her house for months now -- close to a year -- and yet had never been in her bedroom. He'd never even ventured past the bathroom in her narrow hallway.

Everything in here was a new experience. So many things were happening at once.

Her bedroom was neat. Not particularly spacious on account of her king-sized bed taking up most of the room, but everything was in its place. The dresser was free from clutter. The bed was made. The floor was vacuumed.

And it smelled like lavender...or flowers...or something pleasant. He couldn't tell at the moment.

The mattress was soft and comfortable. He could honestly fall asleep right now under different circumstances.

Even her ceiling was interesting. It wasn't just the bare, white-painted ceilings you often see in most apartments. It was tiled.

But the

best

thing that was going on in this bedroom -- the most amazing thing -- was ...

Mo was sucking his dick. Hungrily.

Perhaps it was the built-up fantasy surrounding this moment, or maybe it was their connection, but this was the best goddamn blowjob he'd ever had. By the loud slurping sounds, you'd have thought she was a kid with a popsicle.

He was splayed out on her bed starfish style with his cock jutting up. His pants, just his pants, were thrown off to the side. Monique was on all fours between his legs, bobbing her head up and down in his groin.

He dared not look down. He was hanging on by a thread as it was. There was no way his eyes could see what was going on down there without him making a mess inside her mouth. The feelings...the sensations...the slurping sounds of his blowjob was already threatening his sanity.

God...she's good at that!

In a perfect world, he would've been able to just lay there and enjoy the blowjob. But this world wasn't perfect. It was the world where he was currently cheating on the girl he was dating with the girl he was secretly in love with. Sure, he and Cameron had never discussed being exclusive, but he couldn't delude himself into thinking this wasn't wrong.

He was at war with himself. He knew what the right thing to do was; but goddammit! Couldn't he just be wrong? Just this once?

"Mo...you gotta stop."

Slurp. Slurp.

"Mo...please."

She ignored the half-hearted protests he gave between the moans that escaped his lips. Her mouth was decimating his morality.

In a last-ditch effort, he tried to plead his case. Surprisingly, all it took was one sentence to convince her.

"I can't do this to Cameron."

Instantly, everything stopped. Her lips left his cock, now wet with her saliva. He lifted his head to look down, and what he saw made him feel like shit. She was looking back up at him. Their eyes met, and he saw hers shimmering with tears.

Her expression was...hurt. Abject heartache was written on her face.

He felt like apologizing. He wanted to hug her. He wished he could do something -- anything -- to take that look away from her. More importantly, he hated being the reason it was there in the first place.

Her pain, however, turned to anger. There was a flash of heat in her eyes, and then it was gone. In fact, she looked emotionless, like something inside of her snapped.

She abruptly got up. Very simply, very curtly, she said, "You should go."

"Mo...let's talk..."

"No." she cut him off, her voice deadpanned. Her arm came across her chest to hide her breasts from his eyes, like he no longer had the right to look upon them. Again, as she was walking from the room, she repeated, "I'd like you to go, Alex. Now."

Alex.

Not Lexxy.

Over his life, he'd heard his name millions of times. Yet, hearing it icily spit from her mouth was akin to being called something derogatory.

By the time he found his pants and made his way out there, she'd put on her shirt. She was sitting on the couch, her legs crossed Indian style underneath her. Her focus was straight ahead, looking at a TV that wasn't on. Despite her telling him to leave, he sat down next to her.

Seconds ticked by with the two of them out-quieting each other. Finally, in a dry voice cracking with pain, she said, "You just had to bring her up."

"I'm...I'm sorry, Mo."

She clicked her tongue, shook her head, and then did something unexpected. She laughed. It wasn't a laugh a person does when they find something funny. It was more like a disbelieving, this-shit-isn't-really-happening laugh.

"You had me." she said, as if trying to piece the situation together. "I was ready to give myself to you...completely. For fuck's sake, your fucking dick was in my mouth! And you pick that moment...THAT MOMENT...to bring up your other bitch!"

"Listen...Mo..."

"COULD YOU STOP SAYING MY NAME, PLEASE!" She suddenly screamed out, putting her hand in his face. His mouth snapped shut.

She jumped up from the couch. Alex watched her, thinking she was going to the kitchen. He half expected her to grab a knife, come storming back, and start punching airholes into his torso.

She didn't, of course. Instead, she walked over towards her front door. After opening it, she held it there.

"I need to be alone." She said, an aura of finality in her voice.

"But..."

"LEAVE ALEX! NOW!" she yelled out, thrusting her arm to point towards her outside hallway. Her voice echoed, making the demand sound even louder.

He dropped his head in defeat. There was so much to say. They needed to talk now more than ever. But she wasn't listening. The only thing she could hear right now was the sound of rejection.

Acquiescing to her wishes, he wordlessly got up and walked out the door. As he passed her, their eyes met in a moment of shared pain. She cut the gaze and looked away.

His foot stepped outside; the first step towards banishment. A stuttered breath escaped him. For the first time, he was being cast out of her apartment, like lucifer from heaven.

He turned, caught her eyes again, and begged, "Please. Just let me..."

The door slammed in his face with a loud

BANG.

He stood there at the entrance to her apartment; not moving. It was as if this moment needed a minute to sink in. It just didn't feel real.

Little did he know, Monique was watching him the entire time through the eye hole. A large part of her wanted him to hammer on her door and demand that she let him in. She wanted him to tell her that she meant more to him than

that bitch,

and he wasn't going to let her push him away.

But he didn't. He just stood there, as if in indecision. And then...he walked away.

***

Monique called in sick for the next few days. All her clients were temporarily reassigned. Alex found this fun bit of news out when he showed up to his appointment, hoping to steal a moment to talk to her.

Naomi, her boss, didn't know when she was going to return.

He called her repeatedly, but the phone just rang. It didn't even go to voicemail. All his texts also went unanswered. The first few were left on "Read", but the others that followed just got ignored.

He thought about ambushing her at her apartment, but then remembered that door being slammed in his face. That loud

BANG

was so...final. It was a stab to his heart. He didn't think he'd survive another door slamming encounter.

On the flip side, there was a nagging guilt that had burrowed into his stomach. He found himself avoiding Cameron. His texts to her were short, and he only returned the ones she sent him. When they talked, the conversations were like trudging through a marsh.

Three days of this. Three days of him acting like she was the most repulsive person on the planet. It left her confused and feeling like shit. Between him never wanting to go all the way, and the 10-foot pole distance he now used with her, she could only conclude his interest in her had fizzled out.

And that...hurt.

Finally, during one of their boring phone calls, she just blurted out, "You know, if you don't like me, you can just say so."

"What?"

She kind of laughed. "Oh please. Don't do that. Don't be

that

guy."

Alex didn't want to compound his sins by insulting her intelligence. She didn't deserve what he was doing to her. So, he stopped playing dumb.

"You're right. We have to talk."

"Yes. Let's

talk

." She said, a bit of touchiness in her voice. She then added, "How about we start with the fact that you avoid sex with me like a Catholic priest. Then we'll make our way around to how shitty and distant you've been lately."

"Wow. You're direct."

"Yeah, well, one of us has to be."

Ouch!

And that's how the conversation -- the one that was long overdue -- happened. The two of them talked, and he told her everything.

He'd mentioned Mo before, but never in so much detail. He told her everything. He was completely transparent about their movie time over the past year and some change, the way he felt about her, and the fact that she recently made her feelings known to him.

The only part he struggled with disclosing was the blowjob Mo gave him a few nights ago. It would do nothing but make things worse. In the end, he decided he had no choice but to tell her. Even if it hurt, she deserved the truth.

Honestly, that hit her hardest. Not because it was sexual, per se, but because it was something that she'd done with him too. It made her feel dirty and ugly.

To her credit, Cameron listened intently with no interruptions. To say his confession was illuminating would be an understatement to end all understatements. The crystal clarity hindsight both vindicated her and pissed her off.

She wasn't paranoid. Alex was just an asshole.

"Sooooo...let me summarize this." she said at the end of him getting everything out. The acid dripping from her tongue made each word feel like it was lined with razor blades. "YOU asked ME out knowing you were in love with your best friend. But because she would rather have one-night stands than give you the time of day, you figured I was a good second option ego boost."

"That's not..."

"AND THEN..." she said, talking loudly over him to cut him off. "...because I wasn't the one you really wanted to be with, you put us on some sort of abstinence diet. But, instead of just being a man about it, you strung me along and let me throw myself at you for nearly two months. You only felt the need to confess when she finally sucked your dick. Anything I left out?"

Cameron's view of events painted him in a sinister, manipulative light. Alex wanted to dispute that. What she was saying was technically true, but she was mistaken about the motivations behind it.

At least, that's what he wanted to believe.

"I never set out to hurt you." he said, his own voice sounding feeble.

She snickered sardonically, and then broke out into full laughter. "Isn't that what most assholes say after they get caught doing something assholish?

I never meant to hurt you.

Like that's supposed to make it all better."

There was a pause where Alex could have interjected but didn't. He knew there was nothing he could say that would suffice.

"You know..." she said, jumping back in. "...if you'd been honest with me from the start, we could've worked something out. We could've...I don't know...dated openly or something. Been casual. I wouldn't have had the stupid notion that we were getting to know each other and seeing where it went."

It was hard hearing that. He should've been more upfront with her. Sure, he told her about Monique, but he wasn't completely forthcoming with his feelings.

"I'm sorry." He said simply. There was nothing more he could say.

"Right."

Another long pause; this one the longest of them all. The silence was pregnant; but instead of bringing life, it brought the death of a relationship that almost was. Both knew that under different circumstances -- or at least if different choices were made -- they could've had something special.

Now...they'll never know.

"Well, I'm gonna go now, Alex." She finally said. Surprisingly, she no longer sounded angry. There was no sarcasm. She was more sad than anything.

Alex knew that once she hung up the phone, he'd never hear from her again. A part of him wanted to say something to keep her on the line just a bit longer. He wanted to tell her that this was all a mistake, and to give him another chance.

But he couldn't. Maybe if they'd first, before that night Monique stepped into his car, the two of them would've been great.

All he could saw was, "Okay."

Still, she waited, giving him a chance to say something; a chance to convince her not to allow this end. She liked Alex; had liked him for close to a decade now. At this point, he could've said

anything

; given

any

empty promise for her to jump at. She would've clutched that straw tightly, if for nothing else but the sad solace of not once again being the overlooked girl in favor of one more beautiful.