2nd Wednesday
We slept, intertwined, until noon.
Over fruit, rolls, and coffee, we discussed the previous night's activities, Jaye naked as usual, curled up with her head in Samuel's lap, stroking his Black Cock.
She told us about her mixed emotions β living out the fantasy, its gritty reality, erotic high, her humiliation from the use of her body and shame at how she loved it. Being sold for dances and groping hadn't really bothered her that much β it was kind of an extension of the night before at Z'club, but she had been shaken by her "interview" with the manager and seeing the conditions so different from her imagination.
She had been scared about what was happening and neither Samuel nor I seemed to care β in fact to her we were encouraging what was happening. She almost turned out the sign, and then the Black man had dropped the dance money on the table. She suddenly realized that there was little difference between the two activities, so why not if that's all we thought of her?
At the same time, she was also unnerved by how much she had enjoyed being used by the manager. It wasn't lovemaking, it wasn't even athletic sex, her pleasure was not a consideration β she was a fuck toy, an object to be used β and it had stirred the submissive element in her to an amazing extent.
She described how the long walk across the club and dance floor to the exit and the walk back after being fucked (she no longer had any trouble with the word) had embarrassed and humiliated her, advertising as it did what she was doing β but it also aroused her to the point that she stayed wet all evening, ready to receive a
cock on command. Once her thong was gone, her cunt (as she now referred to it) juices were continually running down her thighs.
Once she accepted her fate, as I had noted, she got into it physically and psychologically, reveling in her status as a vessel for strange Black Cocks, just as she had reveled in being a complete public slut at the beach and Z'club. She
worked hard to arouse those who danced with her, to get them to buy her, then worked hard to give them pleasure and make them cum in her.
Concurrently though, she felt a self-loathing, a feeling that this wasn't right, that it wasn't "her" and a fear that this might be her future. Shame at her feelings of pleasure, a desire to continue, a fear of continuing, a desire to be rescued by the men in her life, resentment that they were subjecting her to this.
On the ride home, the adrenaline and booze started to wear off and the feelings of pleasure were overwhelmed by the guilt and self-loathing. When Samuel rejected her, her world crumbled. No longer was she a queen bee sex goddess, she saw
herself as a worthless whore.
And then, when Samuel and I "reclaimed" her, making love, not fucking, holding her to ourselves, she felt re-born, not to mention the wonderful feeling of hot cum slamming into her cervix and us collapsing into her arms β no longer dominants, but enveloped by her femaleness. The continual orgasms were an added benefit.
Samuel pointed out that Jaye's feelings were common, especially among women who were being "re-born." The desire to be a whore was an extreme aspect and he wanted to push Jaye out of the sexual fantasy phase and into reality as soon as he heard it to find how deep the desire ran β to either shock her out of it or see how
far she was willing to sink. He felt she had done well last night: her little breakdown was a good sign β balance was returning, and she had a sense of who she was.
For my part, I told them the now-familiar story of how I felt humiliated that strangers were sexually using my wife in front of me, and that my wife was drawing obvious pleasure from it.
On one hand I wanted to stop it, to go back to
the way we were, but on the other I had never seen her more beautiful than when she was a slut βand yes, a whore.
I was actually proud of her ease with her sexuality: sitting there as she was openly fondled and obviously enjoying it, watching as she made the "walk of shame" and watching her spread her legs and welcome 9 strange Black men to use her while her wedding ring-adorned hands
urged them on had aroused me.