"I'm ashamed," Allie said, giving me an odd look as we sipped our coffee.
Thirty minutes prior, when she got up, she came out in her robe and we made small talk for a bit, avoiding the subject until it finally burst into the open like a balloon popping. I used all my persuasive skills to try to convince her that it was my fault, and since we had done it together, it wasn't that bad, but she kept coming back to the word shame; shame for going to the street corner, shame for taking the drug and of course for the open sex.
"Look, it's all on me. Be mad at me for everything...I mean the outfits and everything, but don't be angry with yourself. I let you down, sweetie," I said, trying once more to be gallant.
"I am mad at you, but I'm madder at me," she stated once more.
As we continued, I began to feel that her declarations were more for show than because she truly felt upset. If my thoughts were correct, I knew she would eventually soften, although it could take weeks. So, for now, I needed to maintain my place as the bad husband that had led her astray. After getting up to refill the cups for the third time, I moved behind her and ran my hands down her arms then gave her a hug.
"I love you," I whispered.
"After everything that happened?" she answered, but in the way she said it, I knew she was fishing.
"You're everything I ever wanted," I replied, moving my hands to the inside of her robe, and surprisingly, she didn't offer any resistance.
"I feel like I've been so bad," she announced.
"Honey, that doesn't matter at all. I'm not even thinking about it," I responded with an outright lie.
In fact, I couldn't get any of it out of my head, as the entire night was a parade of arousing thoughts marching through my brain. It was all so unique, so different, and we had pushed so far, right up to the brink.
I ran my hands under her pert mounds then over her nipples and was pleased to feel them begin to stiffen. After leaning down and kissing the top of her head, I gently pulled her to her feet and she let me guide her to the bedroom. As soon as we were naked, I worked my way down her body until my tongue was at her entrance. Slowly and delicately, I licked around her slit then used just the tip of my tongue to separate her lips. Allie was nicely lubricated, and I added my saliva to her wetness as I slowly explored every delicate spot. When I thought she was ready, I began working faster until the tip of my tongue found her tiny clit.
Now, my wife loves to receive oral sex and can have very nice orgasms if she is in the right mood. It took just a few minutes to realize that, while pleasurable, my efforts weren't going to lead to anything more, so I lifted my body over her and pushed my dick inside. This way, I thought, we could have a loving act of intimacy, and I could kiss her and whisper sweet things. That's in fact how we started, but I could tell things were still on her mind.
"You really don't think it was that bad," she asked.
"Nope, not at all," I responded, enjoying how her body felt.
"Okay," she replied then after several seconds added, "Nothing bothered you?"
"Like what?" I asked acting dumb, but suspecting where she was going.
"Well...like...ummm...he saw me," she started.
"Yes, and you looked fabulous" I replied and kissed her neck.
Even though I was in risky territory, I wanted very much for Allie to reach a point of acceptance. If I was successful, there was a chance that we might get to do something wild in the future, but if she cocooned herself in despair, I knew it would be a tough place to from which to break free.
"You are special," she whispered back, and then added, "And crazy."
After the exchange, we made love very slowly with lots of tender kisses accompanied by soft mews and purrs of pleasure. I knew she needed it and was content to just enjoy each other, so I was surprised when she brought up the subject again.
"You liked it?" she asked from the blue, once again fishing.
"Yes, sweetie," I answered.
"What did you like," she asked, suddenly becoming specific.
"Everthing! Wearing the sexy outfit in public, talking to the men in their cars, showing your breasts, changing into nothing at Rafael's and letting me show you off. Hell, I even liked watching you smoke the cigarette!" I responded.
Her questions were getting me worked up and I started to move faster, which brought fresh sighs and whimpers from her. For the next few minutes, we kissed and ran our hands over each other, however, when we broke I could tell she had more questions.
"What didn't you like?" she followed.
"There was nothing I disliked. Some surprises," I said.
"Like what?" she asked between pants.
"The cocaine, I guess," I replied.
"Yes, that was stupid," she said.
"Don't beat yourself up," I counseled, as my thrusts became even more pronounced.
Again, a period of silence engulfed us before she spoke, and with her words, I realized what was worrying her, "You didn't want to be with Tanya?"
"No, honey," I answered quickly.
This seemed to please her and I heard a low sigh beneath me. I took the opportunity to give her a long soulful kiss and she purred in contentment when we broke. Her question had brought back all the memories of the night before and my cock was aching to release. I only had a few moments and knew from experience that once I ejaculated all my fantasies would disappear. So, I decided it was time and that I would go for broke.
"I wanted you to be with Rafael," I whispered into her ear, in the softest voice I could summon.
"Huhhh..." I heard her gasp beneath me, while her fingers gripped my arms.