I never wanted or even thought that I could get near a black man until he decided to get near to me.
Hi, my name is Karen, Karen Meek and I guess I am meek by nature too, although not many people know it, my two best friends do, and they've protected me all my life from people who have tried to take advantage of me.
But they weren't around when the time came for me to stand on my own two feet when it mattered, and the person who tried to take advantage of me did! But in the end it has worked out quite well, and I am still being taken advantage of. This all happened when my husband left me at the mercy of my 'aggressor.'
Let me tell you about myself and Larry, my husband. I am 22 years old, he is 24, We have been married for only two months, hardly enough time to settle down into married life. I've known him for 3 years. He got my virginity; he's the only man I have ever been with, though my friends rib me for not experimenting more.
I'm about 5ft 0" short black hair that I wear 'bob' style, slightly shorter at the back than the front, and I have two pointy curls that meet on each cheek at the edges of my full lips, its parted in the centre, and I have a fringe that catches my long lashes. My eyes are a deep blue, black eye brows arch over them, high cheek bones that suit my hairstyle terrifically.
My body, even though I do say so myself, is in perfect synchronisation with my height, if I was a foot taller I would be the worlds top model! I love the way I look, and am, overall happy with my tiny stature because it has made people want to protect me from life's dragons.
I am by nature a quiet sort of person; I've always shied away from confrontations, taken a back seat. I hate getting involved in arguments and would rather defer to a possible opponent. I work in a large departmental store as an assistant; I do like it even though it can be boring sometimes.
I discovered sex simply through being kissed passionately and surprisingly by a boy in my class, he got hold of me, kissed me and I was so stunned I couldn't stop myself from kissing him back. We did all sorts of things in the three months we were together except have full sex, I didn't want to do that, much to his chagrin.
Then I met Larry, we did everything together, we were never apart, and having sex and making love, finding out all about it proper was totally amazing. We ended up getting married, I do love him, or I did, I must be honest and say I'm not sure if I do anymore, even though our marriage is only two months old.
I am one of life's lover's of sexual cohabitation, I can never get enough, I'm at him all the time, and thank the good Lord, he is good at it, it has been stunning sometimes, it leaves me completely spent when he is on top form. And being the meek type of person that I am, when he gets going, I follow his lead.
I do what he tells me, he has me jumping though hoops I can tell you, and when we lie back I'm done for, literally. But I'm always the first up for the next session, and this, I think is what led him to do what he did to me.
He works for a major computer software company, and he tells me that if he keeps doing what he's doing then he can go higher and higher. This prospect keeps him going, and me doing all I can to support him. Which has led me to where I am now, and it's all his very own doing.
He came home one day and told me they were getting a new manager, he was American, being brought over to sharpen the UK arm of the company up. Larry was uptight about it, he worried about being pushed to one side etc.
The new guy arrived, and Larry was quite happy, the new man seemed impressed with him among others too, including of course his rivals. I knew nothing of him except that his name was Morgan Hedley. Larry suggested inviting him to dinner at our house. I nearly emptied my bowels; the thought of entertaining someone of such importance to him was daunting to say the least.
But after much persuasion I agreed, the weather was cool at this time of year, and I do a pretty mean pot roast, so I told Larry I would do that, he was American wasn't he? All Americans love pot roast don't they? A week later Larry told me Mr Hedley would be arriving at 7pm on the Friday night, which gave me time to get all the ingredients I needed without rushing about.
Friday arrived, I had taken the afternoon off to prepare things, Larry had told me that tonight was the most important of his life, our future could depend on it Karen, he told me. My future he said was in your hands, you have to impress him Karen, you have to be on top form.
"Just how important is this Larry?" I asked, "it sounds like more than just a dinner."
"Well," he said, "new broom sweeps clean and all that," was his answer. Now I'm not daft, so I asked.
"Does that mean redundancies, or shuffles are in the pipeline?"
"Yes," he said. Now I got the message, it was more than important, it was just so vital to Larry.
I had everything timed to serve dinner at 8pm, I hoped he wasn't late. I planned to wear a black cotton blouse with long sleeves, a gold chain on the outside hanging between my cleavage, a white above the knee skirt, a tiny bra that enhanced my splendid up turned boobs, stockings and heels. My hair was done to a super shine, bouncy, lush and glossy.
He arrived and that's when I had my first shock, I stood next to Larry when he opened the door to him. He was stood there with a huge bunch of flowers in his hand for me, they were beautiful red roses. A massive toothy dazzling smile on his face, and it was a handsome face. But it wasn't that that shocked me, he was black!
I had always been frightened of black people, irrational you may say, but my mother who was divorced when I was young had had a black boyfriend, he hadn't molested me or anything. But one night I heard her cry out, I got out of bed, I was only 7 years old at the time. I went to her bedroom and opened the door, the black man was on top of my mother and she was moaning. I thought he was hurting her and started to cry.
They both looked at me, mom got out from under him, and collected me in her arms, I asked her if she was alright, was he hurting you, I asked. Mom assured me that she was fine, that they had been playing, and he was tickling her, she took me back to bed and got me to sleep, but since then I've always been wary of them.