Freaed Out

I would like to tell you that things got easier, but of course, that would be a whole lie. One day, I woke up and went outside to get myself to work, and all four of my tires were flat. I had to call into work that day, and on top of it, I had to pay nearly $700.00 for new tires.

I knew she had something to do with it, she noticed that I was not as talkative with her and she had the nerve to say, "You seem a little flat today, is everything alright?" I wanted to throat punch her, but I refrained.

Then there was a three-page email about the importance of dressing appropriately at work, complete with examples. I was like, the day you come in here dressed like this, will be the day I do it. I'm following your example ma'am.

Then one day, I go to her office to drop off papers and she said, "I'll never give him the satisfaction of a divorce."

I smiled, "How nice of you to force a man to be in a relationship he doesn't want to be in."

She got in my face, so close, I could feel her breath, "You don't want to fuck with me, little girl. I promise you, this is a game you will not win. You're in way over your head."

And maybe I was, but I wasn't going to let her bully me.

"I wonder if your family knows about all your little wild endeavors." I smiled. "How would your father react to his daughter just being an all-out ho...fucking and licking anything that moves." She was silent. I grinned, "You have a nice day, Amy." I strutted out of her office.

She had finally left me alone. And I was finally in the headspace to go visit with my biological mom and her family. She was having a get-together at her place. So, I went.

She had a lovely two-story home with a three-car garage. I went to the door and was invited in, "Come in Sasha, this is my husband, Nathan." He was tall, he had this reddish-brown hue with freckles, a nice looking fellow with kind mannerisms, "Welcome Sasha." He said. I smiled.

"These are our sons Neil and Simon." They looked a lot like their father, tall, sort of lanky, reddish-brown tint.

I shook their hands, "I'm Sasha, your big sister." They smiled.

"You look just like our mom." Said Simon, the younger one.

"Because her mom is our mom, silly." Said Neil.

"Alright boys, let's behave." Said Nathan.

It smelled so amazing in their home. And I'm not talking potpourri good, I'm talking, someone was cooking up a storm good. "It smells good in here," I said looking around.

"You're in for a treat, one of my friends has a son that is a chef, he catered us an awesome meal for today."

He walked me to the kitchen and that's when I saw him, he smiled, "Ms. Sasha."

"Sean?"

"You two know each other?"

"We're kind of neighbors."

"Yeah." He replied, he was with a woman, she looked at me funny and gave a fake smile, "So you live in Winston?"

"I do. And you?"

"I'm here. But I work out there, that's how Sean and I met."

I smiled and helped myself to some food. A plate of BBQ chicken, potato salad, dirty rice, green beans. And it was good. We talked for a while and I had a good time playing video games with my brothers. After a while, I went to the kitchen to pack my plate to take home, Sean entered, "So, why you ghost a brother?" He joked as he leaned against the counter.

"Ghosted?"

"Yeah, that's what we say when someone suddenly just stops calling or contacting you out of the blue, no explanation."

I nodded, "It's complicated."

He nodded with a grin, "So that hot date, turned into something?"

"You can say that, it's become somewhat convoluted and I'm just trying to figure it out."

"I've been there." He looked at the trays nearly empty, "I guess I did good on the food."

"It was really good. I loved it."

"Maybe if you, um ever decide to uncomplicate your life, I can cook for you."

"What about--"

"Aw, we're just friends. It's nothing serious."

She walked into the kitchen, she was short, a little fluffy had natural hair, a little shorter and kinkier than mine, "I'm ready Sean."

He looked at me, "I'll see you around." I waved goodbye to them both and watched him leave. The idea of uncomplicating my life, now that was intriguing.

****

So, let's talk about ATL and how I almost freed myself of this crazy situation. Here it was the middle of the end of July, it was hot as hell, and that Thursday, they decided to have an ice-breaking session down at the pool. I had promised myself to be on my best behavior. I had not been with Ken in the last couple of weeks. His wife had kept him reigned in pretty tightly and he looked stressed.

I was at the pool with Noni and there were some other insurance agents there, young, handsome, pretty smiles, great physiques. They joined us by the pool, one was Latino, he had this pretty golden hue and soft brown eyes, and those eyes were constantly glued to me, Ken walked by just when Christian asked me, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

I laughed, "it's complicated."

Noni interjected, "She doesn't have a boyfriend."

We laughed. "So, let's hang out tonight, we can go dancing. I know a place."

"Okay cool."

So that night, we ended up at a Latin Spot. I was looking right too, I had my legs out, pair of short shorts, and a cute top with the back out.

Christian pulled me to the dance floor, there was tropical music playing. He taught me some dance moves and then some bachata came on and he pulled me even closer. His hands were all over me, he dipped me and turned me and we were having a great time. He kissed me and I smiled. It was a bold move, but I welcomed it.

The next thing I know, I went to use the restroom and when I returned, he was nowhere to be found. I walk over to Noni at the bar on her phone. "What happened to the guys?"

She laughed, "Apparently, their companies have requested that they be sent back."

"Back where?"

"To their stations. They were told to get back, pack and head to the airport." She sighed, "I'll call us an Uber."

When we got back to the hotel, Noni went to her room. I received a phone call from Amy, "Hi, I need to speak with you, come to my room."

Now, it was late, midnight, I was like, what this heifer want now. I went up to her room, knock, she answered, all dolled up, her hair flowing, wearing a silk robe, "Come in." I step into her room and turn to her with an annoyed face, "what's this face, come now Sasha, we were once such good friends. I mean, I did make you cum hard that first night." She smiled.

"I'm sorry, why am I here again?"

"I don't want there to be bad blood between us. And Ken has been in such a sour mood lately. I've never seen him like this."

"You asked me to leave him alone, so that's what I'm trying to do."

"So, are you're just out there trying to connect with anyone, that young man was handsome, but—"

"Wait, did you have something to do with them being sent home?"

She smiled, "Perhaps."

I walked towards the door, she stopped me, "Ken is making idle threats to leave me. I've realized that a marriage cannot function if both parties are not satisfied. He's not satisfied and I've been selfish. Let me watch one more time and I promise, I'll leave you two to be together whenever you want without my interference."

I sighed; how could I trust her. She was always moving the goal post. "I don't know."

She touched my hair, I invited him. There was a knock, she went to open the door. Ken walked in. He looked at me with those eyes and instantly I felt moist. How could I say, No?

I nodded.

It began with him lying in bed. She sat in a chair; I want to see you go down on him. I gave her a side-eye and she returned it, "It's not like you haven't sucked his cock before." I did, but not with her eyes watching. It felt awkward, but I got in bed kneeled between his legs, and reached for him. I wet it and stroked it, he smiled when I tasted him.

I went to work on him, he made all sorts of sounds, reached for my hair, then, as she did the last time, I felt her hands on me. She gripped my butt cheeks, then spread them, and I felt her tongue all up and down me, her fingers thrusting inside of me, she was deep in my ocean like she was searching for a hidden treasure. It was hard for me to concentrate on my task. Not going to lie, her tongue game was not to be played with, my leg trembled and I leaked everywhere, "That's beautiful." She said.

She climbed in bed, "Fuck me, Ken, in the ass, hard." Slowly, he got up. I watched as he mounted her from behind. It was weird. I knew they had sex, but I certainly didn't want to see him with another woman.

He plunged into her and she took it like a champ. She was loud and obnoxious, "Yeah Ken, pull my hair, harder, harder, yes! Yes! Oh my God yes!" She played with herself as he pounded her from behind. I sat uncomfortably, and when it was over, I hurried to leave.

I was on my way back to my room when he caught up to me in the hallway, "Sasha!"

I turned, my eyes were filled with tears, "I hate this. I am trying to deal with all of this."

"She's, my wife."

"Okay, so let me fuck some guy in front of you."

He frowned, "Is that what you want. Did you want to fuck that other guy tonight? It's that easy for you to move on."

"I don't know what you want or expect from me." I walked off, opened my door and he followed me inside. "I just—"

He kissed me, "No, don't say it. I gave you time. But I can't let you go forever." He went down on his knees, "Please Sasha." He held onto my legs. He kissed my center, undid my pants, pulled them down, and tasted me. He touched, licked, sucked, my hands were in his hair. He stood up, "I want you. I love you. Tell me you love me too."

I wrapped my arms around him, his fingers touched me again, it was something about the way he rubbed and inserted simultaneously that drove me wild. "I want you inside of me," I said. Quickly, he came out of his pants. He lifted my leg, dipped, and penetrated. "mmmm"

He felt so nice. She started singing, it had been too long since I felt him and she missed him. His tongue in my mouth. He had this look on his face like he meant business and he was going to fuck the confusion and defiance out of me, "Is it mine?"

"Yes," I replied.

"You love me."

"Yes."

"I'll be your first and your last." He picked me up and bounced me up and down for a while, then walked me to the bed and laid on top of me. My arms above my head, he held my hands, while kissing all over me, "Sasha baby?"

"Yes, baby."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Then he went deeper, our hearts beating so fast, panting, I was moaning out of my mind, him thrusting and grinding, me squeezing, "oh, oh, shit," I cried. Then he went faster, I could feel him on the edge, I wondered if he was going to pull out, but he finished inside of me. All I could think is, oh my god, if I get pregnant, that woman will kill us both."

He looked into my eyes, "Sorry. I just got lost in the moment."

I nodded, "It's okay, I can go get one of those pills."

He shook his head, "don't." I was like, what, have you lost it.

"Don't, I mean, maybe you won't get pregnant, but if you do, it won't be a bad thing."

I looked at him rolled over on top, "You're crazy, you know that."

He laughed, "Crazy about you."

I looked down at him, my sexy handsome man. He touched my nipples and then pulled me into him. My hair fell around our heads, he laughed, "I love your hair. If we have a daughter, I want her to look just like you."

I smiled. "And our son?"

"He can look like me of course."