Fighting and Loving

I cannot apologize enough for this taking so long. Life started to get a little overwhelming with school, work, and family. But, I made a commitment to finish this story and I will. Thanks to everyone who continually showed interest and pushed me to put out the next chapter. I hope that the next won't take as long since I know many people will be anxious to get to the "good part". Please keep sending your comments and voting.

*

As Nic turned the key to open her door late Sunday night, she couldn't help feeling a mixture of relief and apprehension. It had been two whole days since she had seen or even spoken to Des, and she could honestly say she still had no idea where the hell they now stood. A week ago, Nic had thought it was impossible for someone like Des Radel to even notice she truly existed outside of class. Well, he might have noticed, but she definitely hadn't thought he would have tried to have sex with her in the middle of her kitchen. Now she was faced with the possibility of finding herself in his bed, and Des seemed completely determined to make that possibility a reality.

After their interesting interlude on Friday night, both Nic and Des had thought it best to wait till after class on Monday before deciding how their relationship would continue. Each had busy weekends to face and no time to change their schedules in order to explore the new situation they found themselves in. Following an unsure goodbye, where neither had wanted to touch for fear all control would be lost, Des left with a quirk of his lips and a wave. Nic had watched him climb into his Jeep and drive off before she allowed herself to close the front door.

Walking into the living room and sitting on the couch, Nic wondered at what had just happened. What had she gotten herself into? She didn't have any reference for how to deal with Des. She'd barely had three boyfriends in her entire dating career, and all of them had been professional, respectful types. Not one of her exes had made her consider breaking her rule of not sleeping with a guy on the first date, let alone before a date had even taken place. But with Des, it was exceptionally hard to think straight, especially when her body kept begging her to let him do all of the things his eyes promised.

Barely able to sleep that night, thanks to several fantasies of what might have happened in her kitchen, Nic had risen early Saturday morning to travel to her parents' house for the weekend. Packing Pyewacket and a small bag into her car, she had driven to her best friend Lila's house to drop of her cat before setting out. Nic had felt nothing but dread as she pulled up to Lila's lovely suburban home. They had been closer than sisters since rooming together in college and Nic was ninety percent sure that every detail of last night was going to be read by her perceptive crony.

No sooner than when Nic had stepped past the threshold, Lila's honey brown eyes had lit up with the thrill of the hunt. "Something's up with you. Did something happen last night?" she asked, stopping Nic in the process of putting Pyewacket's carrier down in the front hall.

"I don't know what you're talking about," said Nic, wincing at the way her voice seemed to fade out in the middle of the sentence.

"The hell you don't. You might as well go ahead and tell me now because you know I'll get it out of you anyway."

"Seriously, I don't know what you could mean." Nic quickly tried to change the subject. "Look...you know I love that mutt of yours, Chi Chi, to death. But, if I come back and find Pye had a nervous breakdown because of that damnably excitable dog, I'm blaming you."

"Please," scoffed Lila, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes. "If anything Chi Chi should watch out for that demon cat of yours. I swear she lives up to her namesake and might just be a witch's familiar. So what happened last night?"

Nic exhaled deeply, cursing Lila's unshakeable resolve to be nosy. She watched as Lila set her shoulders in that "no bullshit" pose and knew there was no leaving without spilling the beans.

"Okay...last night, after you left... You know how you were telling me that I should just tell my sensei, Des, how I felt about the way he's been treating me? Well I got the chance last night."

"You mean you called him?" asked Lila, arching an eyebrow.

"No. He decided to stop by and we had the chance to talk."

Lila nodded her head and waited for Nic to continue. It was one of her tricks to just be patient and wait out whoever she might be interrogating. Faced with that unbending determination, Nic slowly told her everything that had happened the night before. As she got to a watered down version of what had occurred in the kitchen, Lila could no longer hold on to her excitement.

"YOU DID WHAT?" she practically yelled at the top of her voice.

"Shhhh! You'll wake up Brian," Nic whispered, trying to calm Lila down, without much success.

"Don't give me that. You know my husband sleeps like the dead, especially on Saturday morning before noon. So, tell me what this means. Are you two going out?"

"We don't know," Nic replied. "We'll figure it out after this weekend. But, he seems resolved to start some kind of relationship."

"Well it's about time. After all of those lame excuses for men you've been dating the past few years, you'll finally get some real heat out of someone. If he's half the man you describe him as, the next few weeks should be very interesting."

Nic had looked at Lila's satisfied expression with something akin to resentment and disbelief. Wanting to get away before Lila demanded more of the details; Nic gave her some quick instructions about Pyewacket and slipped out of the door. She half expected her friend to follow her outside, launching an all out attack for more information on this man she had yet to meet, but was relieved to make it to her car without further embarrassment.

The rest of the weekend had been a jumble of daydreams about Des and outings with her mother and father. Luckily, Nic was better at hiding things from her parents than she was with her best friend. And, although she had become lost in thought on more than one occasion, her explanation of being extremely busy at work was just convincing enough to be believed. She had successfully made it through her father's 57

th

birthday celebration, catching up with some extended family, and early morning church services without arising suspicion. Still, Nic had been glad to get on the road for home, knowing that she couldn't keep evading her mother's hints about any possible "serious relationships".

Of course, now that Nic was home, she could no longer avoid thoughts of Des. Even as she kicked the door to the garage closed and dropped her bags, she wondered if he had thought about her at all over the weekend. Bending down to let Pye out of her carrying case, it took Nic a moment to notice the blinking light of her answering machine, stationed on the counter just inside the entrance to the kitchen. She already knew what messages to expect, but found herself hoping that maybe Des had called to check on her. They had both agreed not to make contact until Monday, but Nic had a hard time eliminating her desire to hear his voice.

Haven't even started going out and already I've turned into a clingy girlfriend.

Nic walked over to the answering machine and pushed the play button. Immediately the robotic voice spouted out that she had seven new messages and launched into the date and time of the first. She got herself a drink of water as she listened to her boss calling about the Anderson account, a couple of telemarketers, and Lila demanding that she call back ASAP. As the tape continued on to her father, asking her to let him know when she got home, Nic moved out of the kitchen and put Pye's carrying case into the hall closet. She had grabbed her purse and overnight bag to head upstairs by the time she got through another cold call, but stopped short at the voice that issued from the small speaker next.

"Hey Nic. I was just calling...to let you know...I was thinking about you." Des' deep voice seemed to reverberate off the very walls and echo throughout the small space. Nic quickly dropped her bags and ran to repeat the last message. The machine had recorded his call about five minutes before she had pulled into the garage. Listening to the short sentence once again, Nic felt unsure of her ability to remain standing. Putting her back against the wall she slowly slid down to the floor, disturbed by her strong reaction to Des' simple statement.

Pyewacket moseyed into the kitchen and curiously examined her seated mistress. Climbing into Nic's lap, the cat made itself comfortable. Petting Pye's soft form distractedly, Nic stared off into space.

"Oh Pye," Nic whispered, as she refocused on her surroundings. "What am I gonna do? I could really fall for this one."

**********

Des didn't really understand why he had called Nic. They were going to see each other tomorrow and she hadn't even been there to pick up the phone. It wasn't like him to do something without reason, but now he was acting altogether without thinking. At least he had been honest in the message. He

had

been thinking about her. It was all he could do not to think about Nic and what might happen after class the next day.

After leaving Nic's house on Friday night, having stealthily slid her cell phone under some papers on the dining room table, Des knew it was going to be a long weekend. With memories of Nic's body under his fingers and the taste of her kiss still on his tongue, the last person he had wanted to hear from upon getting home was his father. But, as he walked in the door, that was exactly who was on the other end of the ringing phone.

"I'll be in Atlanta this weekend on business; we need to meet on Sunday," his father said in way of greeting. His tone implied that there was no option to the demand. Mr. Radel was used to having his orders obeyed immediately, with no argument. But, it had been a long time since Des had jumped to his father's commands.

"I can't. I have plans," replied Des, his own voice emotionless and flat. There was nothing they really needed to say to one another, and Des had no desire to see his father after more than ten years with hardly any communication.

"Son...you can't keep avoiding me. There are things we need to discuss, whether you'd like to or not."

"There's nothing we need to discuss. You made a decision about this a long time ago. No use in changing it now," said Des, pulling the phone away from his ear, ready to hang up.

"Your sister will be there." Des' father had always known what to use to get to his son. And the mention of his sibling now was the only thing that stilled his hand. Sighing in exasperation, Des spoke with slow deliberation into the receiver.

"You never change do you? You will not use Mia as bait to make me play your game. If she wants to see you, that's her choice..., I've already made mine." Des turned off the phone before his father could say anything else. It gave him a sense of satisfaction to be able to cut the old man off, but the conversation had left him anything but content.

He could only hope his father had been lying about Mia. It had to have been a ruse to flush Des out of hiding, as his sister wanted to see their father about as much as he did. Still, it disturbed him to think that it might be the truth. He made a mental note to get in contact with Mia as soon as possible. He wouldn't really be able to rest easy without some reassurance straight from the source.

Moving through his house without the aid of light, Des contemplated the rest of his weekend. He had promised to join the other teachers at the school in attending a two-day martial arts function. Since he was well-known in certain circles, they thought the publicity would be helpful in drumming up new attendance for the dojo.

As Des threw himself on his bed, fully clothed, he hoped that the rigorous activities over the next two days would distract him from his current situation. Closing his eyes, he was immediately presented with a picture of Nic, hair rumpled and lips moist from his kisses. He opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling, trying without success to think of anything but the one woman his body refused to let him forget. Even after the unpleasant call from his father and worries over his sister, Des couldn't jog Nic out of his mind; and, unsettling as it was, he didn't want to. At the moment, she was the one thing in his life that he looked to with anticipation.

Refusing to give in to the temptation of releasing some sexual tension, Des finally fell asleep. The following forty-eight hours seemed a never-ending combination of socializing, handshaking, and teaching that Des would rather have avoided. Through it all, he knew that he came off as more distant than normal. He was practically the walking dead, allowing his auto pilot to take over as he demonstrated the aikido style and talked to other practitioners and interested new students. At least after years of drills and study he could easily depend on his instinct and senses to get him through these sorts of things.

Des thoroughly blamed his lack of concentration on Nic. Everything he did was combined with the thought of her sticking to the back of his mind. He wondered what she was doing and who exactly she was with. More than anything, he considered whether she was having as much trouble as he was focusing on other things. Des knew that Nic was sexually attracted to him, but other than her frustrations with the way he'd been treating her, he was still unsure how she felt about him. For that matter Des wasn't too sure what his feelings were for Nic other than respect for her hard-working nature and a need to fuck her that had become an ever-present distraction.

But, Des somehow managed to get through the weekend without mishap and spared enough brain function to remember to call his sister. It was the first thing he did when he got back home Sunday evening. Sprawled on the couch, he dialed her number and hoped he wouldn't be waking her up. Picking up before the end of the second ring, Des couldn't help but smile at Mia's sarcastic voice.

"My goodness, hell must have frozen over for you to be calling me out of the blue."

"Don't start Mia. You know I only call when it's important."

"Oh yes. That's why I haven't heard from you since you got back to the states. Apparently it's not important to let your little sister know that you're still alive."

"Hey, the phone works both ways. You could have called me." Des chuckled at the almost habitual fight he and Mia had when they finally contacted one another. Though they each were highly important in the other's life, time always seemed to get away before they had a chance to really catch up.

I'm gonna have to put a stop to this

, thought Des.

I should really check up on her more.

"Yeah, well as the younger sibling I reserve the right to be irresponsible when it comes to this. You're the one with all the discipline; it should be easy for you to remember to pick up the phone. Anyway what's the emergency?"

"I got a call from our Father." Des heard Mia's disgusted snort at the mention of their parent. "He wanted to meet with me today and told me you would be there."

"Well, I'm glad he told you. He certainly didn't think it was something he had to concern me with," replied Mia, utter disdain dripping from her usually cheerful tone.

"I knew he had to be lying, but I just wanted to make sure. You know he has a way of getting what he wants."

"Ah, but therein lies the rub. He never really wanted me, did he?" Des could hear the old resentment in Mia's voice. It was a topic they didn't need to dwell on as the ending result could only be bad memories. Of course, that was to be expected considering the source of the conversation.

"So," said Des, trying to change the subject. "How's the little one?"

"She's fine," replied Mia, sighing softly. "Sleeping peacefully for once. You wouldn't believe how big she is now... You should come visit...we miss you."

"I know. I'll get out there as soon as I can... And Michael, is he still treating you good?"

"Of course he is. This is hard on both of us. We weren't ready for Morgan, but we're making the best of it... Michael's trying real hard. He sees her as much as he can and gives me all the support I need. I can't ask for more."

"And you're still content waiting for him to settle down?" asked Des. He had never liked that his sister's long-time boyfriend wouldn't commit to marriage. Especially after Mia found out she was pregnant.

Maybe I should visit a little sooner...

"I know what you're thinking and you might as well forget it. I won't have you coming out here trying to force the life you think I should have. I'm prepared to wait. That's what people do when they're in love. And it's not like I'll sit around forever, you know me better than that. Michael will realize what Morgan and I can give him, or he won't. But, it's his choice to make."

"Yeah alright. As long as you're happy," said Des, knowing there was no use in arguing. Mia was as stubborn as he was when it came to living her own life. That didn't stop him from wanting to charge in and fix everything. But, he saw that as his duty as an older brother; and nothing Mia said would ever change that.

"So, enough about me. Anything interesting happening to you?"

"No...nothing really." Des could almost hear his sister perk up on the other end of the phone. Somehow she always knew when he wasn't exactly telling the full truth.

"Nothing really, huh? That means it must be something big like another promotion or, you've finally saved up enough to open your own school or,... You've met someone, haven't you?"

"How the hell do you do that?"

"It's a gift," said Mia, her pride a practically palpable force through the phone. "Who is she? And please don't say it's another of those bimbos you usually screw and skip out on."

"No, she's different. I don't know, there's just something about her," replied Des. The confusion he'd felt all weekend resurfaced as his mind returned to Nic. Now that he thought about it, she was nothing like any of the other women he had ever dated. Not just because she was black; no, it seemed that there was something more to Nic that Des had never encountered in another woman. Maybe that's why she was all he could think about.

"Different is good. How long have you been going out?"

"We haven't yet. But, that'll change starting tomorrow. Mia, I have to go. I have some things to do. I'll call you later this week, I promise."

"Changing the subject, huh? Okay. You better not forget to call. I love you Des."

"Me, too." Des felt bad about lying to his sister. He didn't really have anything more important to do. But, glancing at the clock, he had realized that Nic was going to be home soon. He looked at the phone he still held in his hand and remembered his promise of two days ago.

It had been Nic's idea that they not contact each other until Monday. She thought they needed some time and space to get used to the idea of their new relationship, or whatever it was. Des knew he didn't need more time, but had agreed because he wanted her to be comfortable. Now, staring at his phone, Nic's number drifting through his thoughts, he knew he was about to break his promise.

Des dialed her number and was almost relieved when she didn't pick up the phone. He didn't really know what he wanted to say to her. He left a short message and quickly hung up, having no idea why he had called in the first place. It had felt like the right thing to do and he had acted on that feeling. There was no other way to explain it.

Des tossed the phone to the other side of the couch before he did anything else foolish and made his way to bed. Tomorrow he would finally see Nic again, and perhaps he could start getting over this incredibly confounding attraction. Spending time with Nic would surely reveal that she was just as ordinary as he had originally thought. Delving into the mystery of her would be the easiest way to get her out of his system, wouldn't it?