Distractions

_(*(*(-)*)*)_

_(*(*(-)*)*)_6 Years Ago_(*(*(-)*)*)_

I kept staring at my closet thinking that divine intervention was going to throw something out for me to wear. It didn't. I looked at my watch again. The bonfire had started already and here I was like an idiot, still staring at my closet.

"If you don't pick something, I will!" Cassie shouted. She must have been as sick of watching me look at my closet as I was.

"Fine, fine," I said as I picked up a blue t-shirt.

"Oh no, you're not wearing that." Cassie jumped off the bed and pushed me aside. "Just put this on." I looked at her like she was crazy.

"Its too cold for this lacey thing." It was a shirt my mother had bought in her futile attempts to get me to look more like a girl.

"That's why you're wearing this jacket over it. Put it on." I didn't have the energy or the time to argue with her on this one, so I just put it on.

"See," she cooed as I reluctantly shrugged into the jacket. "You look so cute! And all those senior boys are gonna be there. We want to try and impress somebody."

Cassie wouldn't have a problem with that. She'd been impressing boys since the age of eleven when she was the first girl in our grade to get boobs. For her, this stuff was easy, for me it was like pulling teeth.

"I don't like it," I complained.

"You look fine, and the cream color of that jacket goes perfectly with your skin tone. Let your hair down." I didn't have time to protest as she grabbed my clip and pulled my hair free. "Oh my god, you look so hot."

My hair tumbled down my back in large ringlets and curled around my face. My hair was definitely my favorite thing about me.

I know Cassie was indulging me because she wanted to get out of here, but I did look okay. My chest was a little more exposed than I was used to, but that's okay, I still looked good – well, good enough. Compared to Cassie, I looked like a troll.

She had on a pair of skintight skinny jeans that took her 15 minutes to get into and a tight almost see-through black top. I shook my head at her boldness. Her hair was done up, and she had on heavy makeup. She looked older, and more mature. There was no doubt the senior boys would be paying

her

attention. Whatever. Worst comes to worst I could always hang with Brenden and Gavin, if they aren't drooling over my best friend.

By the time we got there, everyone had all ready arrived, and nearly half the alcohol was gone.

"Your brother and Gavin are going to be here, right?" she asked for the hundredth time as we made our way through the trail, deeper into the woods.

"Of course. Its their party," I answered as I eyed her suspiciously. She'd been really preoccupied with them as of late, and it was starting to get on my nerves.

Cassie and I stepped into the clearing, and before I could spot my brother or Gavin, Cassie was gone. She undoubtedly caught the attention of a senior just as she'd planned. I grabbed a beer from the stash and looked around the party.

Out the corner of my eye, I saw her snuggled up to Gavin, flirting shamelessly. She caught the attention of a senior all right, the only senior

I

wanted attention from. I took a deep breath trying to calm my nerves, and I turned from the scene.

Like the wallflower I was, I milled around the fire, not really feeling like I belonged there. It seemed like everyone there was enjoying the fire with their boyfriend or girlfriend, and I was all alone. I bitterly hoped Cassie was having a good time off in the woods without me.

I found a small spot on a tree stump by the fire and sat down resigning to just wait it out. It was a beautiful night, and the fire was hypnotizing. I was so engrossed in watching the flames lick into the air; I never heard my brother approach.

He sat down with a thump beside me and threw his arm across my shoulder. Sometimes it seemed like he thought I was a nuisance - him always having to check on me.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded. I didn't need to tell him that I wish I had someone to snuggle up to when the wind blew. It was depressing seeing all the happy couples around the fire like this. And to think, I'd even 'dressed up'. What a waste. I should have stayed home and watched a movie. Clearly this was Cassie's type of thing, not mine.

Brenden didn't say anything else. He handed me his 40, and I took a big swig. I wasn't a big drinker, but hey, now was as good a time as any. Brenden watched as I took another swig. I couldn't wait until we were old enough to go to the store ourselves and afford real beer. Old English is gross.

"I thought you came with Cassie."

"I did."

"Where is she?"

I shrugged my shoulders. My brother shook his head. He knew as well as I did where she was. She was probably in the woods with one of my brother's friends right now, doing things I'd only read about in Cosmo. I almost wished I could be doing the same thing. Almost. But I know how guys talk. I know the things they say about girls when they aren't around, and I didn't want anyone talking about me the way they did about Cassie, even if I was supposed to be flattered. At least I knew she wasn't in the woods with Gavin. I could hear him laughing off to my left.

"Do you wanna go home?"

"No, I'm okay." I didn't look at him when I said it, because I knew that if I did, he'd find someone to take me home. I'm a terrible liar and I didn't want him feeling more responsible for me than he already did.

Brenden nudged my shoulder with his. Sometimes I wondered if he ever wished he had a sister that wasn't so socially awkward. This bonfire would be a lot more fun for me if I'd made more friends. He, Gavin and Cassie were the only people here that I could really talk to. All night, I'd only had trivial conversations with people I knew from school. After we finished talking about class, or teachers, and what they planned to do after graduation, there was nothing left to say.

"Since there aren't that many people left, Gavin was gonna get a game of spin-the-bottle going." I didn't respond because I thought he was gonna tell me he didn't want me playing spin the bottle with all his friends.

"You wanna play?" he prompted after I remained silent.

I looked at him, almost shocked. "You want me to play?"

"Sure," he said brightly. He pulled me from my sitting place, and dragged to me the other side of the fire where Gavin already had the last of the party members sitting in a circle next to the fire.

My brother sat down next to his girlfriend and pulled me down beside him flashing me a smile. As I looked around the circle, I realized I was the only sophomore playing, and there were more boys playing than girls. Gavin had just finished strategically placing all the girls around the circle so that each time the bottle was spun, hopefully it would land on one boy and one girl.

As he looked around the circle, he spotted me for the first time and raised his eyebrows. I glared back. He chuckled then proceeded to tell us the rules.

"Ok," he started in a booming voice. "We're playing spin the bottle with senior rules. There's enough liquor left for everyone to get their own bottle," he flashed my brother a smile, and it seemed like they planned it that way as my brother grinned back at him. Gavin produced bottles from behind his back and began passing them around the circle until everyone had one.

"Ok, now, an empty bottle goes in the middle. We will start with me spinning and go clockwise. If the bottle doesn't land on you, you drink. No cheating ladies. The point of this is for all of us to get fucked up, so no pussy sips." The guys laughed.

"If the bottle lands on you, you and the other person have to kiss for three seconds, tongue optional," he said with a grin as he looked at the girls sitting around the circle. You could almost hear their breath catch in their throats at the thought of them getting to tongue kiss Gavin. It didn't escape my notice that Gavin's eyes skipped over me.

"If you choose not to kiss, then you drink for five seconds. The third time the bottle lands on you, you and your partner have to go into the woods for three minutes." Gavin said this as his eyes locked on a girl sitting directly across from him. This must have been his ploy to get her to make out with him. Looking at her face, I vaguely recalled who she was.

I think her name was Emily Parish, and she was desirable by all the guys because she refused to put out. That made her an oddity. She was beautiful, and I could see why Gavin was putting up this charade to try and get into her pants.

Her presence only made me more mindful of how different we looked. Her fair skin and light eyes were in direct contract to my mocha skin and brown eyes. I felt extremely ordinary sitting in this circle, and suddenly I was looking for a way to escape. As if sensing my tension, my brother nudged my shoulder and smiled. I tired to relax.

"If you choose not to go into the woods for the three minutes," Gavin continued in his silky voice. "You have to remove an article of clothing. Shoes and socks, don't count." I had to give it to him, he was very thorough.

"Every one clear on the rules?" Gavin's eyes locked on mine as he asked the question, and I nodded. I knew he was daring me to chicken out, which is exactly what I wanted to do, but seeing the challenge in his eyes, I couldn't back down now. He knew how weird I was around boys that weren't him or Brenden and I wanted to prove I could do this. Gavin nodded happily, and the game began.

I wasn't sure how many times we'd been around the circle already, but I knew that if I wanted to be sober enough to walk, I needed to slow down. Every time the bottle didn't land on me, I had to drink, and now about a fifth of my bottle was gone. I was sure that as long as I was sitting down, I'd be fine.

I was feeling very warm now, from the combination of the liquor and the fire, and I shrugged off my jacket. I could feel the heat rise in my face as I tired not to focus on the buzz that was taking over my body. The game continued until it was Gavin's turn. He stared at Emily as he spun the bottle, no doubt hoping it would land on her. It didn't. The bottle landed between me and a girl who had joined the game late.

The bottle was closer to me than it was to her, and I didn't know what to do. I looked up at Gavin and watched as a smug smile spread across his face. Before either of us could say a word, the girl next to me jumped up and yelled she was going to do it because the bottle was closer to her. Of course it wasn't, but no one said anything as she made her way across the circle to Gavin. I watched in fascination as she threw herself into his arms.

He kissed her back, with his eyes open, focused on his watch. When the three seconds was up, he pushed her off him and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. She made her way back to our side of the circle with a mystified look on her face. I could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn't look up. I knew my face was on fire, and I didn't want him to see. I was insanely jealous of this girl I didn't know. I had to pretend like it didn't matter.

The game continued and finally, the bottle landed on me. I watched as Gavin raised his eyebrows, trying to gage my reaction. The boy that spun the bottle played baseball with my brother and Gavin, but the alcohol prevented me from remembering his name. I think it was Wilson Butler, but the brightness of his eyes was distracting me. I leaned across the circle, unaware of the view I was giving my brothers friend down the front of my lacy top.

I came to rest in front of him, and its seemed like he was just as nervous as I was. I closed my eyes and waited until our lips met. The three seconds was over before I realized it even began, and I sat back on my heels, no doubt the heat in my cheeks very evident. I took my place back beside my grinning brother. He looked and me and I punched him in the shoulder and told him to shut up.

A couple turns later, I spun and the bottle landed on the same guy I had just kissed. There were no pretenses this time as I moved toward him and planted my lips firmly on his. This kiss was more fun because I wasn't as shocked to be kissing a senior. He used his tongue to coax my mouth open, and I let him. Gavin called time rather loudly and reluctantly we broke apart. I crawled back to my side of the circle fully aware that I was drunk.

I didn't drink for the next couple of turns, trying to get a handle on myself, when suddenly I heard the group let out an audible gasp.

"What did I miss?" I asked as I opened my eyes. Everyone was staring at me, and I suddenly started to panic. Did I just drool on myself and not notice?

I looked down and saw where the bottle was pointed. One end was fixed on Gavin, and the other fixed on me. I felt my world tilt as I tried to calculate how many times I'd gone. This was my third time, which meant I'd have to go into the woods with him.

My eyes slid from the dirt-covered bottle until they landed on Gavin. He was staring at me smugly as if he already knew I was going to chicken out. The only sound that could be heard around the circle was the crackling of the fire.

No doubt, because of the liquid courage, I stood up rather wobbly and asked, "Are you coming or what?"

Gavin looked at my brother, and my brother shrugged. "She wanted to play."

"Not a big deal guys, it will be just like kissing the family dog." Gavin's eyes darkened as he stood and followed me. I knew he didn't want to do it, but he didn't have to make it so obvious in front of everyone one. I tried in vain to walk in a straight line but the alcohol and the unevenness of the ground was making that nearly impossible. Gavin took my arm and began marching me deeper into the woods.

We walked deeper into the woods were no one could see us and we stopped.

"You don't have to do this you know."

"Why, so you can call me a chicken?" I was aware the words sounded slightly slurred.

Gavin grinned. "I wouldn't call you a chicken. It would be our little secret. No one has to know."

"Am I that repulsive to you?" Yep, alcohol is definitely liquid courage. I never would have said that aloud if I weren't inebriated.

"No," he said with a smile, "but you are my best friend," he said as she shook his hair out of his eyes. He still had that smug look on his face, and I wanted to prove to him that I could do this, and it wouldn't make a difference.

"Not a big deal. Lets get this over with." I'm pretty sure my voice cracked.

"You're blushing, Red," he said as he stepped closer to me. Suddenly this didn't seem like the best idea. The alcohol seemed to let me forget that I was standing in the middle of the dark woods with my ultimate crush and best friend standing inches away from me, ready to kiss me.

Oh my God!

"Its from the alcohol," I said with more confidence than I felt.

Gavin took another step closer, and I felt my heart leap into my throat. Suddenly he looked like he couldn't do it. Maybe he really did think I was repulsive.

I stood completely still as he cupped either side of my face with cold hands. "You don't have to do this, it's only a game of spin the bottle."

"I know," I answered rather breathlessly. There was no way I was going to tell him I'd been dreaming about this moment. I felt my body shiver and I wasn't sure if it was from anticipation of the breeze that was rustling the leaves.

"Are you cold?" he asked, his hands still gently holding my head still.

I nodded.

Slowly as if still deciding if he was going to kiss me, he stepped closer to me. The heat from his body sent shivers down my spine, instantly warming me. I licked my lips as I waited for his to descend upon me. It seemed like forever until the silky texture of his lips met mine, our lips just touching at first. As he increased the pressure, I began to feel my knees weaken.

Gavin snaked a hand around my back and pulled me closer to his body. I felt his warmth envelope me as his lips continued to attack me in a way I never knew possible. I gasped at the feeling of him being so close to me, and he took the opportunity to explore my mouth with his tongue. With increasing fervor, he began to deepen the kiss, and I was afraid I would explode from the butterflies wreaking havoc in my belly.

Gavin backed me into a tree and pressed his body into mine. I wasn't sure what was happening, but I knew I didn't want it to stop. I'd never been kissed like this before, and I wasn't even sure it was possible. I looped both arms around his neck as I tried to pull him closer to me, and he did the same as he slid one hand into my hair and the other on the side of my face as he continued controlling the kiss.

I could feel something pressing into my belly as he continued to pushed himself harder into me. I was getting lost in my senses and the feel of him until we both stilled at the sound of people calling our names. As if scalded, he pushed back away from me, leaving me leaning up against the tree for support; I still didn't think my knees would be able to support me.

He stumbled backward a few paces looking at me like he couldn't comprehend what just happened. The rest of my senses seemed to return as I could begin to make out the voice screaming that the three minutes were up. Gavin shook his head, as he looked at me wide-eyed. Without a word, he turned and nearly ran towards the fire.

It took me a minute to remember how to use my legs. Judging by the way he ran from me, he did think I was repulsive, and the speed at which he ran back to the fire confirmed it. I ran a hand through my hair as I started to walk back to the fire. I tried not to let the tears that were threatening to spill from my eyes fall. Clearly, this was another case of an unrequited crush made worse by the fact that he was my best friend. Suddenly, without my jacket, I felt the cold winds pierce me, and I couldn't wait to get out of the woods.

I put on a brave face and marched back to the clearing. That's okay, I told my self. If crushes were easy, they wouldn't call them crushes, right? No problem, I would just have to get over it. This was one crush I would convince myself wasn't worth it.

I walked back to the circle careful to avoid looking at Gavin, who out of the corner of my eye I could tell was sitting very still. Everyone started cheering as I sat down, and for a brief moment I wondered what Gavin has said in my absence. I chanced a look at him and saw he was staring at his hands.

"So, how was it?" a girl asked me from the other side of the circle.

"Just like kissing the family dog," I said trying to make a joke of it. The group erupted in laughter. My brother nudged my shoulder with a smile. I grabbed my jacket and pulled it back on. No more alcohol for me.

I watched as Wilson leaned into Gavin and said something, which he laughed at, but caused Gavin to stiffen like a statue. Gavin still wouldn't meet my eyes.

The game continued, and it was Wilson's turn. The bottle landed on me again. Now it almost seemed like he was trying to make it land on me. I watched as a wolfish smile spread across his face as he raised his eyebrows at me.

"Looks like it's our turn in the woods."

Before I could respond, Gavin snatched the bottle and jumped up.

"Game over," he grumbled. "Lets get out of here, its cold."

Apparently he thought I was too repulsive for

anyone

to go into the woods with. Everyone whined, but no one contested Gavin as he stood looking at everyone, making it clear the game was over.

"Next time, then," Wilson said as he winked at me.

Gavin walked off to throw dirt on the fire as my brother stood. I never noticed the concern etched into Gavin's handsome features.

"I still don't see Cassie, so I'll take you home." I didn't protest as Brenden led me towards the path and out of the woods.