I have spent the last two days reflecting on one of the most passionate nights of my life so I thought today it might just do me some good to write it down.
For the past several weeks I have been talking to someone I finally met on my last trip to Springfield. Eric is a wonderful man. About 6'3 with a somewhat muscular build for a guy in his mid-30s. Brown eyes, short black hair and goatee, smooth dark brown skin. I met Eric thru one of our vendors where I work. He's the most professional salesman any of our vendors have and his advances although very welcomed, came unexpected.
I have known Eric for almost a year and up until about 2 months ago our relationship had been entirely professional. 3 months or so ago Eric accidentally sent me an email that was clearly intended for someone else. It was meant for a love interest in his life and the things he said to her, the things he described wanting to do to her had me squirming in my chair.
I probably should've stopped reading it knowing I was not the intended reader, but I just couldn't help myself. Ultimately, I would have to email Eric and let him know that whoever this was intended for didn't get it and I was unsure what his reaction would be, especially knowing that I might've read it.
I emailed him a pretty simple note that said "Hey, I got this email from you, it's obviously intended for someone else and I thought you should know so that you could send it to the intended person. Please forgive me, but I did read most of it, not knowing who its intended reader was and please don't be upset with me. Whoever it is, she's a very lucky lady. Alyssa"
Radio silence. I have no doubt that Eric was probably embarrassed and given the company he works for is one of our largest vendors I'm sure that he was instantly concerned about the consequences of this coming out. I have no doubt that most companies might sever ties with someone, over something I perceived as an honest mistake, for sending something that could be clearly mistaken for sexual harassment.
The original email had no names in it, just very clear descriptions of what he wanted, intended to do to her. Fortunately, I'm open minded enough to not judge someone for a mistake, a harmless email who's intended audience would've been as captivated by his love interest in her as I was to be reading about it.
So, 3 weeks passed, absolute silence. Eric normally called or emailed at least every other week to make sure we didn't need anything extra and to confirm any pending order but not this time. This in my mind was crazy, he had nothing to worry about. I just assumed that he should know that I was not going to be offended.
I'm more than 10 years older than him. At 48 although I think I'm still attractive I don't begin to think that a man that much younger than me is going to want anyone my age when much younger options are available.
I am 5'5, weigh 140 lbs., and have to work at keeping my figure. I have shoulder length brown hair with blonde highlights, hazel eyes, 32C breasts that have fortunately stayed in place but certainly not the well-endowed woman that men look for these days, I tan but only enough to have that subtle tan. To me, just average and this gorgeous man could have anyone he wanted so why, why be concerned enough to not clear the air and move on, business as usual.
I just couldn't stand it. I had to call him. I enjoyed our professional relationship. I appreciated having a vendor that handled the minor details so efficiently enabling me to focus on the bigger picture. I called Eric, and he very apprehensively answered the phone by simply saying "Alyssa, I'm so sorry."
"What do you have to be sorry about Eric?" I asked him.
"That email was intended for someone that I had been dating, someone who hadn't really been very receptive to my advances. I had an email for you with an order confirmation next to it, I accidentally typed your address in the one you got instead of your confirmation. I'm embarrassed and I know that I could lose my job for that mistake. I guess I figured if you were offended and I avoided agitating the situation that it would hopefully just go away."
"Eric, I sent you an email, told you I was sorry. I even told you that she was lucky. How on earth could you arrive at the conclusion that I am upset with you?" I asked.
"I don't know, given our positions with our companies I was just concerned that possibly offending you could lose your business or worse, my job. I'm very embarrassed that I made a mistake of that nature."
"Eric, there was no harm in the email. Calm down, I'm more upset by your silence than the email. Mistakes happen, we're human but when you make a mistake with me, talk to me. Don't avoid me. You are too good to our company; you have taken very good care of me. I never even considered that it was anything other than a mistake. A very seductive mistake meant for a much younger, much prettier lady."
With a laugh he said, "Alyssa, I know you're a bit older than me but jeez, you're an attractive lady and I could see pretty easily how you could see my mistake being meant for you since there wasn't any names in it. Dumb on my part there."
"Oh please, look I know that I'm attractive for 48 but I don't think for a second that a 35-year-old man is going to want me. I knew it wasn't for me."
"For the record I'm 38 but ok, I guess I can see where you are coming from. And just for the record, your assumption is wrong. If you lived here and didn't work for my customer then yeah, I could see me flirting with you, asking you out, writing you letters and emails like that", laughing as he said it.
We said a lot more that day as that call alone lasted about an hour, but the air was clear. The confusion had been addressed and I was just glad that someone I really had considered to be a "work friend" was talking to me again. In fact, from that day on we talked at least by email daily. Sometimes when we were both slow, we would spend the afternoons talking.
I figured it was of an innocent nature, but it was clear that we were getting closer, friendly collogues changed to very close friends, so much so that we exchanged personal cell phone numbers. And at this point it seemed that every free moment was spent talking or texting one another about anything and everything. Our love lives or in my case lack of, to our families. I have two grown children that sometimes drive me nuts and he has a teenage daughter that certainly does the same. We just pretty much talked about everything.