With a frenzy of fear and guilt, she reached for the phone hoping it would turn on. The glass bit scrapping her finger and she felt her heart pound with frustration at her anger and the fear Brad was lost. The pain in her chest was building as she could feel the heartbreak hitting her.
He was the only man she knew she wanted, and a man that she wanted to spend her life with. The thought of him being perfect for her surged through her mind just as she knew the phone was not going to turn on.
Looking at Tanisha with a dread fear in her eyes. "What the fuck I am going to do?"
"Shit girl, call your voice mail and see what number it came from. See if he left you a number."
With her friend's phone in her hand, she dialed her voicemail. Her message greeted her and then her fingers quickly pressed the buttons to log in. The sensation of her heart about to give out came to her. Her mind raced with what he said and if it wasn't too late.
The first voicemail was him being happy telling her about their trip tomorrow and how the weekend was all about them. The next one was him being concerned. The rest of the messages were him pleading with her to know why she was not talking to him. He sounded like he had a broken heart asking for her just to talk with him.
She quickly called back the number that dialed her last. She felt her wet tears dripping down her face. Looking at her friend and seeing the "I told you so" face did not help.
Skylar knew her anger was an issue but not like this. She hated that it had to rear its ugly head towards Brad who did nothing but love her.The anxiety was killing her as more tears streamed down her face.
It was Thursday and the weekend was right there as was the getaway Brad planned. Everything was set for nice trip into the city and for Skylar to bask in the sensation of a relationship that was blooming like a flower in the spring. The worry that she killed her relationship was more evident as she knew she could not contact him to apologize.
The number was not accepting calls and did not have a voicemail box setup. She texted her heart out to him. One message was not enough as she felt like her fingers hurting she was going so fast from typing so much.
With nothing coming back and Tanisha gone for the night, she felt alone and in a pool of her own tears and agony of what happened. Feeling it was worse than when Dwayne cheated on her because she could focus the anger and hate on him, but this time she knew it was all her fault.
Her body could not produce anymore tears as she felt like giving up being alive and the idea of having a relationship. She knew by the lack of contact that Brad was upset with her but she still wanted to plead her case to him. The feeling a fight was okay and that once it was over then they could have makeup sex and be together again.
Sleep only came with a mixture of pills and the exhaustion of crying. There were no classes tomorrow and then the semester was over next week. She had only a week left before she went home and then took the summer internship.
The next day waking up seemed like a chore not worth doing. She knew she needed to get up but it didn't seem worth it. She quickly thought of Brad and how she woke up next to him. Her memory quickly flashed to his smile and his desire to be with her and then she felt the pit in her stomach knowing it was probably all gone.
It was in the afternoon that she threw some clothes on and ventured outside. The meeting she had with the counselor went well and she knew next year she would be graduating and then she could focus on coaching in a school. It still felt like it was pointless when she thought about the future. The idea of not having Brad in her life still loomed on her mind making the future seem not worth it.
Reaching for her phone was a habit and not having one seemed like she lost her arm. With a few tears still coming down from thinking about Brad and her phone, she decided to go back to her dorm and sulk in her own misery. She hated not having Brad in her life and hated that she fell so quickly in love.
She opened her computer and decided to give Brad an email hoping that he would at least get that. Tanisha was home and said that she did not get a single text from Brad. Feeling it was her last ditch effort, she typed away apologizing for letting her anger get to her. It was just a few lines of how she missed him and that she was sorry.
When her computer dinged letting her know she got an email her eyes opened wide and her heart jumped. If it was him then he read it and knows the story and she should be back within. She knew he loved her and he needed to know she felt the same way.
It was only two weeks and she had no idea why she felt such a strong connection to him and cursed her emotions for letting them run wild when she was with him. Was it lust or was it really love she questioned herself while opening up her computer. She knew he wanted her bad and would do anything for her and she knew she would do the same. Knowing it was more than lust she clicked opened her mailbox to see a mailer daemon.
With a quick click she saw that his email was not a school account anymore. The questions over why he left school confused her. Not wanting to wait around anymore, she decided to visit his dorm to see if he was gone from the school. Was he so heartbroken that he left the school?
Stepping into his dorm she saw the same bunch of guys hanging out with their laptops gaming around tables. She had no idea geeks had their own dorm but now she felt connected to them strangely.
Running up the two flights of steps she ran to his dorm room and saw it was empty. The boxes of phones were there but his other things and the posters on the wall were gone.
"What the fuck?" Skylar blurted out as she saw that he was packed up and gone.
"Are you looking for Brad?" A sound came out from behind her.
She turned around and saw a very geeky and kind of pudgy guy. He looked young but not too young as his hair was a mess. He was definitely in the right dorm and looked like he was ready to win a Science Fair.
"Yeah...yes. I didn't know he moved out."
"Wait, I know you. You were here the other night during the raid. I saw you with Brad....wait aren't you his girlfriend?"
"Yeah. Did he move out?"
"This morning. He left school. Think he got a job and an apartment or something. Greg is taking over the phone business for awhile too."
Her mind was like a race car revving its engine as thoughts, ideas and options came to her. He was still on campus and that she had a chance to see him.
Not even saying a word, she found herself running to the parking lot. The main street where the dorms were allowed cars only to load and unload at times. It got contested at times but she knew at this time he would be the only one that would be loading up.