This story happened back in the 1980s.
It may have been one of the most embarrassing moments in all of Nancy's 38 years. Here she was, sitting in the emergency room waiting to see a doctor for a problem she never could have imagined. But as mortifying as this experience has been for her, she couldn't help but see some humor in it.
The striking blonde buried her face in her hands and began to lightly chuckle. Finally, the nurse approached and said the doctor will see her now. Fortunately, the doctor who attended to Nancy was female, so it would be easier to talk about her issue.
"So, Nancy, what ails you?" the doctor asked.
Nancy's face turned beet red, and she struggled to get the words out.
"It's my diaphragm," Nancy answered.
"Are you having trouble breathing?" the doctor asked.
"No, doctor...my diaphragm that I use for birth control...I can't get it out of my vagina," Nancy said as she dipped her head, her chin almost hitting her chest.
The doctor remained silent for a moment before asking how this happened. She asked Nancy if she inserted it properly. Nancy said she did. She asked if her diaphragm was the right size. Nancy responded that it was.
The doctor then asked exactly how this happened.
"Well, uh, long story short, the man I had sex with was so big he pushed it way too deep inside me for me to be able to reach it," Nancy said. "I tried a couple of times to get it out, but I just can't get to it."
The doctor paused briefly before saying, "I'm sorry if I'm sounding so surprised, but I have never treated something like this in all my years of practicing medicine."
The doctor called in the nurse and pulled her out of Nancy's earshot to explain the situation and to have her take Nancy to a private room where there was a gynecologist chair. As she led Nancy to the room, the nurse couldn't wipe the devious grin off her face. She had dozens of questions for Nancy but her professionalism prevented her from asking.
She gave Nancy a hospital gown and told her to get in the chair. The nurse asked if Nancy was in pain.
"It's uncomfortable but I'm not in agony...this is just so fucking embarrassing," Nancy said.
The nurse, lying through her teeth and trying not to laugh, said, "The doctor didn't give me too many details, but I understand you're having a problem with a birth control device?"
"I don't know what the doctor told you, but here's the deal...I got fucked by a man who by far was bigger than any man I'd ever been with...and, well, this is the result," Nancy said in a somewhat defiant tone.
The nurse didn't know how to respond and, as she left the room, murmured to herself, "I guess I'll avoid diaphragms and stick with the pill."
As Nancy sat in the chair waiting for the doctor, her mind drifted and recalled how she found herself in such a predicament.
Nancy was attending a weekend afternoon chamber of commerce mixer in her mid-sized town in California's Central Valley. Like much of that part of the state, it leaned conservative, as it was the typical farming community.
Nancy, co-owner of a floral shop, went to the mixer with Brad, a well-to-do white man who was a major player in the agribusiness field. Basically, Brad was a good-ol' boy whose family had plenty of influence in town. And he wasn't shy about letting others know it. They had been dating for only three weeks, so their relationship had not reached the serious stage yet. They were still getting to know about each other. But they did make a nice looking couple.