I'm Alice Johnson, a forty three year old white widow of four years. Until recently I was a respectable church going member of society. Voluntary charity work was a large part of my life. How did I end up being addicted to black cock, and loving it?
It started fairly innocuously.
My husband left me with a good house and a good insurance payout. I didn't need for anything materially. My son, Bob, and I lived a good life, even though we still grieved for our loss.
Bob threw himself into his education and I took on voluntary work to keep ourselves occupied.
At least once a month when weather permitted we had a barbecue on Saturdays. It was always for Bob's friends and it was great fun. Bob had a wide range of friends of various races and their girlfriends, if they had one were also invited.
There was a limited amount of drink allowed and they were told that getting drunk was likely to get them uninvited for future events. Any sexual activity would have the same result. I had a position in society that I wasn't going to loose by allowing that sort of behaviour in my house.
Because of this parents of those invited were happy to let them come, knowing that they wouldn't get into any trouble.
These parties has been going on without any trouble until about six months ago. The people who came changed over time as lives changed. Old faces left and new ones turned up. One of the new faces was Winston, a tall muscular black guy. He was a pleasant young man but didn't have much in the way of conversation. I thought he was quite good looking, not that I was going to do anything about that.
I was surprised that he seemed to find me attractive. Never a beauty in the classical sense, my face has a few more lines and my body is a little heavier than it once was. He was often hovering around me, offering to help with anything that needed doing. I also noticed that he kept trying to see down my top or up my skirt. My breasts certainly seemed to fascinate him.
As I wasn't interested, I tried to ignore it. That only seemed to make matters worse.
He would make comments like, "I like that blouse you are wearing, your legs look great in those shoes," I ignored those comments.
One day we were alone in the kitchen when he blatantly said, "It's been a while since your old man died. Have you had any good sex since?"
"That's a disgusting thing to ask and it's none of your business," I snapped back at him.
"I guess you haven't then." He said. "If you want me to, I'll give you the the time of your life."
"Behave yourself." I replied. "Sex outside marriage is a sin and I'm not going to be a sinner for your satisfaction."
"C'mon, Mrs Johnson. You're a good looking woman and you deserve some fun in your life."
"No, Winston. Just plain no. It's not going to happen so you can put those thoughts out of your head."
Nothing more was said as a couple came into the kitchen for more drinks.
The conversation stuck in my head. I hadn't had sex since my husband died and I did miss it. I'd been on a few dates but never found anybody that I would want to share my life with. I could have had sex if I'd wanted to but I wasn't going to do that until I married again.
I has to admit to myself that Winston was a fit, good looking young man and if I were to have sex outside marriage, he might be a good choice. A little shudder went through me at the thought but I pushed the thought away. It wasn't going to happen.
Things took a turn at the next barbecue. Winston was there but he wasn't hovering around me like normal. I kind of missed him.
Somebody asked for more drinks so I went to the basement to get some from the fridge. As I reached the bottom of the stairs I heard a muffled moan. I paused, wondering what it was. As I started to open the door. I saw Winston having sex with Sally. Sally is Andy's girlfriend and Andy was away visiting family.
Sally's legs were wrapped round Winston's back as he pushed in and out of her. He looked huge and it was shiny with Sally's wetness. I was disgusted with both of them but I couldn't stop watching. I was also very turned on. My nipples were tingling and I could feel my panties getting damp. I couldn't believe myself. My hand was outside my dress right between my thighs gently rubbing myself. Sally turned her head towards the door. I quickly left hoping that she hadn't seen me..
I kept thinking about what I'd seen. Sally was obviously enjoying it. She was writhing around and had her hand in her mouth to muffle her cries. The contrast of Winston's very dark skin against Sally's paleness was quite erotic. Why was I thinking about it? It was a disgusting immoral thing to do. They should be ashamed of themselves.
At that point I should have banned Winston for breaking the no sex rule, but realised that he wasn't aware of it having not been there when the parties first started. I gave him a free pass, which was probably a mistake.
The images of Sally and Winston kept playing in my mind. I couldn't believe what I'd seen. I'd never seen anybody having sex before and I was ashamed at my bodies reaction to it. Sally had obviously been enjoying it. I began to wonder what it would feel like if it were me and not Sally.
Every Sunday I went to church and prayed for forgiveness for my sinful thoughts. The thoughts still kept coming. They went from wondering what it would be like, to wanting to find out. I was imagining Winston between my thighs having sex with me. I was disgusted with myself.
Winston wasn't at the next barbecue and I found myself missing him greatly. Had I done something to upset him? Why wasn't he here? Why am I thinking like this?
I went to church and again prayed for forgiveness for my lustful thoughts. This was becoming a habit. I didn't like having those thoughts but I couldn't stop them from popping up.
After church, Bob went with his girlfriend, Jessica, to spend the day at her parents place and wouldn't be back till late evening. I went home alone.
I'd just taken my jacket off when there was a knock at the door. It was Winston. My heart stopped. What was he doing here?
"Hello, Mrs Johnson. Is Bob in?" he asked.
"No, He's with Jessica. He won't be back till late." I replied.
Why did I tell him that Bob was going to be out all day?
"That's a shame." said Winston. "Could I come in for a drink of water?"
Those images flashed through my mind again. I didn't want to let him in but I couldn't think of a reason not to. Maybe I didn't want to think of a reason.
I stood to one side and said. "Sure. Come on in."
I walked over to the cabinet and got a glass. As I was at the sink filling it, Winston came up behind me, pinning me against the sink with an arm either side of me.
"What are you doing, Winston?" I demanded. "Get away from me."
I could feel his warm breath on my ear as he said "Sally told me you watched me fucking her in the basement. Did you enjoy it?"
"No, I didn't." I lied.
"I bet you have thought about it a lot since then."
"No, I haven't." Another lie. How did he know?
"You wished it was you, not Sally, didn't you?"
"No way. I would never think of such a thing," The lies just kept coming.
"I know you are thinking about it now."
"No. I'm not." Liar.
