A spark, a flame that ignited in one day- it caused a stir and there you were.
This is the story of a 30-something black female professional who finds herself physically attracted to her older white male co-worker.
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I am not a conventional beauty. I'd like to say that my mind is far more remarkable than my looks are. I'm a few inches above average height, with medium length dark hair, dark eyes, and mocha caramel skin. I have a curvy shape- large hips and a round behind topped off with an ample chest. I wouldn't call myself fat, but I'm not exactly an athlete.
It all started one day while I was at work. I'm a office co-ordinator in a large corporate facility that deals with human resources decisions from smaller offices across our region. We service and push out decisions regarding customer service complaints and other internal issues for our 50 locations. I report to a manager who reports to another manager, who reports to a divisional manager, and so on. It's your basic corporate entity with a thousand faces and titles no one ever needs to remember or keep track of. All anyone needs to remember is who their boss is, and to never park their car in the wrong spot.
My manager called a meeting one morning, about six months ago in the boardroom of our workspace. Patricia was a shot woman- possibly what one would aptly refer to as "stout" because she barely cleared five foot five. Her short light brown hair had the shine of a person who had weekly appointments at a salon, although the style of frames she wore on her glasses and unruly eyebrows suggested that she was not one to be preoccupied with appearance and style. I had assumed she was a person who cared what others thought, but only a bit.
"Sam, we have a bit of a snafu." Pat began as the meeting commenced. I knew something was definitely off due to the lack of other attendees at this meeting. The only other person there was Patricia's manager, a suit from the 11th floor named Brad. "We have had an..."Issue" at one of our locations that will require some intense monitoring. There is some suggestion that an employee may have been systematically misappropriating budgets, as well as practising unfair hiring practices for staff."
"Alright," I said following along perfectly. "We can just start audit reports and-"
"We can't exactly do that" Brad interrupted. "The problem is that the location is one that both Pat and I frequent regularly. As the immediate superiors who would be in charge of investigating these allegations, we already have a conflict."
"Not to mention that the person at the root of these allegations is an esteemed member of the local community, and coach of my son's football league" added Pat.
"So...you want me to lead this investigation?" I began to ask with some excitement. There was some rumour of a promotion a few months before, and even though I was only an office co-ordinator, I had the experience as well as the hunger to jump to the next level.
"Not exactly. We want you to be involved for two reasons" Brad explained. "Firstly, because you don't live nearby, so there is no real conflict. Therefore, our office can be in charge of the investigation while still keeping an arms-length approach to the situation. Secondly, and most important for you, you could really use this experience for the future. Perhaps if and when a management position becomes available."
As soon as I heard the word management my ears began to burn. In hindsight, I should have thought about this offer a bit more thoroughly.
"Yes! I will do this project for you. Who will I work with?" I asked eagerly.
"We're bringing in someone from another region to work with you on this. You two will have two weeks in one of the offices on the 11th floor to get the investigation completed." Informed Pat. "We want the report closed within a month."
Monday morning I bounced into work, in an eager, happy and excited mood. I trotted so intensely on the pavement that my calves burned by the time I passed through building security. I skipped my usual floor and headed straight to my new, although temporary digs, on the 11th floor. I had thought briefly last night about who my partner may be. As Pat's office co-ordinator for the past two years I had enjoyed some funny and polite banter with some of the other managers from other regions. I imagined a petite blonde who would be a bit older than me- someone who could perhaps be a cool acquaintance or friend after all of this was over. After my last breakup, my ex got custody of all our good friends, so I was a bit lonely away from work. As I entered the room assigned to me and my mystery new partner I saw a taller figure with their back to be.
"Knock, knock," I said as I tip toed into the room past the slightly open door. "I'm Samantha King, here for the investigation."
The figure immediately turned around as if startled at the sound of my voice. It was an older man, possibly mid-fifties- but in great physical shape. His lean figure suggested a work out of about 4 days per week. He wore glasses and his hair was more salt than pepper. "Hi Samantha, I'm John."
I should have been less naive.
I played his intense stare off as curiosity or just over-friendliness. When we shook hands his hand lingered on mine, and of course, I politely thought that he had a little crush. For me, I thought he was handsome, but as soon as I see a wedding band on a man I immediately write him off my list. I'm not in the business of breaking up families.
We divided our preliminary tasks and decided that the first part of our project would be to pull all of the human resources files from the hires at this location and start from there. I took one desk on the far side of the office, and he chose the desk nearer to the door. I realized months later that he did this so that I would have to walk past him at least twice per day. My desk was situated in front of a large flat screen television hung beside a white board. The door to the office was behind me, and the windows were to my right. It was a narrow but deep room, with about 20 feet from the door to the wall with the television and white board.
I didn't mind being in such close quarters with this much older man. I didn't feel any threat, or worry. I had just had my 30th birthday, and I guessed him to easily be in his mid-50s. He was married, white, and I would guess that he had a few kids my age. I was single, of African ancestry, and much younger. I guess I just didn't think we had anything more in common than the work ahead of us.
It wasn't until the third day of our project that I began to be comfortable with the investigation. It had become extremely clear that the store owner was only hiring members of his extensive family to fill positions at the store. I had pulled the human resources forms and taken a second look at the list of references provided by each applicant; most of who were the same names who re-appeared on multiple submission. I knew that the allegations had weight to them, and that very soon we could have a report put together and I would be on my way to management.
It was a Wednesday afternoon, and I decided to try some spicy Thai food from a place around the corner. When I came back to the building I took the stairs to help burn off my extravagant lunch. Combined with the spicy food and the exercise, a few buttons from my work shirt had been loosened for comfort. When I got back to the office, John was already there at his desk, leaned over his notes from the case.
"Hey John, how was your lunch?" I breezed past and sat at my desk dropping my bag and whole body into the office chair.
"It was alright. I just munched on a sandwich from home. Nothing special." He answered without looking up.
"That's good." I murmured and turned back to by work. I figured that he was engrossed in his notes, so I let one more button slip. I should have known better.
About 30 minutes after I got back from lunch, I noticed some window cleaners perched on a neighbouring building. I had been reading some very small printed documents, and decided to give it a rest for a moment. My eyesight was not exactly 20/20, especially to spy on some window cleaners across the street, so I slipped on my eye glasses. I gazed across for a few seconds until a glint of sunlight bouncing off metal caught my eye. My eyes were immediately drawn to the source- the white board in front of me. I realized then that the cleaning staff in the building deserved a gold star because the white board was so shiny and reflective that I could clearly see my reflection. I could see my breasts nearly popping out of my shirt- all clearly outlined to me while wearing my eye glasses.
Then I realized that I could also quite clearly see John's reflection. I also realized that the angle at which he sat at his desk enabled him to have an unobstructed view of me at all times. An unobstructed view of me and my unbuttoned blouse which he, at that very moment, was peeking at from behind his notebook.
Our eyes met in the reflection, and he knew he was caught.
The quiet, older man I politely ignored for the past three days had suddenly become interesting.
I re-buttoned my shirt and cleared my throat.
"John, how are those financial records going?" I asked to clear the air.
"Good. They are good. What about your human resource files?" He asked, possibly to appear unassuming.
From that awkward moment onward we began to make pleasant conversation. He told me about his family, and career. He had been a manager for over ten years, and was considering retirement, but nothing concrete yet. I told him about my recent breakup, and that I had been at my current position for two years, but hoped to be a manager soon.
"So why did you agree to come all the way up here for two weeks to work on this case? Don't you miss your family?" I asked.
"Yes. I miss my kids. But not my wife. Things have been...rocky lately." His face was heavy with stress lines that immediately appeared once the topic arose. He stood and walked around to the front of his desk.
"Oh." I replied, and went no further.
"We have had some issues regarding her mental health. It's an ongoing problem," he began to explain. "When the offer to take off for two weeks came around I figured it would be a good opportunity to get some space from everything." He leaned his body on his arms and had them braced behind him on the desk like a lecturer speaking to a class. It was as though he was reiterating a speech he has explained to himself many times before.
"I'm sorry to hear that," I offered. What else could I say? "Hopefully this case will help to take your mind off of things."
His gaze trailed up from the floor to my feet, and slowly up my legs and body to my face where it rested on my eyes, holding them there. Coupled with catching him check me out in the reflection of the white board; a heat began to build where none had been before. We looked at each other motionless for what seemed like ten minutes, until he smiled and asked: "can we grab dinner tonight?".
