A Love Worth Fighting For

"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" yelled the enthusiastic studio audience.

Jerry Springer slides down a pole on his stage and makes his rounds shaking hands with some of the audience members before they settle down to their seats to watch emotional trainwrecks air their dirty laundry on his nationally televised show.

"Today on my show we have lovers sharing sexy secrets." stated Jerry. His audience gave an appreciative "OOOOHHHH" for the juicy subject matter.

"Let's meet our first guest Jackson. Jackson has been dating his girlfriend, Charice, for over a year and a half now, but he has a sexy secret that he wants to tell her." said Jerry to the home and studio audience.

"Hey Jerry." came Jackson's slightly raspy voice from the stage where he sat in a solitary chair.

"Hey Jackson. So tell us why you are here today on my show." replied Jerry congenially.

"Well I'm here to ask for my girlfriend to marry me." replied an increasingly nervous Jackson as he wiped his sweaty brow.

"AAAAAWWWW" replied the audience.

"But the theme of today's show is Sharing Sexy Secrets. I'm confused. Why would you be here if you are going to propose to her?" asked Jerry as he led Jackson by the nose to the inevitable, crushing reason why he was on national television.

Jackson blew out a tense breath that ruffled his outwardly stoic demeanor and replied, "It's because I need to come clean to her about what I do for a living and see if she'll still be with me."

"OOHHHHHH" replied the audience in full rapt attention at the steamy bit of news about to unfold before their very eyes.

"And what do you do for a living?" asked Jerry into the crowd's attentive silence.

"I am a porn star Jerry." Jackson stated blandly, after blowing out a harsh breath.

"WWWWHHHHOOOOAAAA!!!" responded the audience before resuming their "JERRY!" chant.

After the crowd slowly calmed down from the juicy tidbit, Jerry continued his "investigation" of the facts.

"So, she doesn't know that you are involved in pornography? What did you tell her that you do?" asked Jerry.

"I just told her that I'm an personal fitness trainer." replied a slightly nervous Jackson.

"I'll say you're probably one heck of an entertainer." replied Jerry. The crowd laughed heartily and renewed their "JERRY" chant until they quieted down after a few moments. The show's producer made the noise "Boing!" over the studio's stereo system, much to Jackson's chagrin & the audience's delight.

"So, she's outside the studio right now and hasn't heard anything that has transpired. Without further ado, let's bring out Charice!"

The crowd claps with the arrival of Charice. A few catcalls went out to the attractive dark skinned woman. Jackson looks over at the love of his life and sees confusion and hurt written all over her pretty dark brown face.

"Hello Charice. Welcome to the show." says Jerry.

"Hi, Jerry." said Charice softly as she steadied her wobbly gaze upon Jerry as he stood in the midst of the audience.

"Charice, do you know why you are here today?" stated Jerry in a reassuring tone that didn't reach the nervous woman's ears.

"No, I don't." she replied, visibly shaking and wringing her hands.

Jackson felt like an ass. He looked as his woman sitting in the chair next to him. She looked delectable as usual. Her beautiful afro was pulled back into a large puff in the back, making his hands itch to reach out and stroke her soft curls. Her almond shaped eyes flitted back and forth at the lecherous smiles of strangers anxious to see her impending misery. He didn't even call the show – his bitch of a co-worker called the show because she wanted his Charice out the way so she could start something up with him.

Forcing himself to come back to reality, he focused on her shapely dark brown calves. Her body was covered up by a soft peach colored cashmere knit sweater set and a chocolate colored suede pencil skirt which led to the smooth expanse of those beautiful calves before ending on her brown sandal heels that accented her cute, suckable toes.

"Jackson. Is there something that you would like to tell Charice?" asked Jerry, bringing Jackson's focus completely back to the harsh stage lights and burly bodyguards in the stage corners.

Jackson blew out a sigh, and ran his hand through his shoulder length raven waves. "Sweetheart, I brought you here to tell you the truth about me, before you hear it from anyone else. I love you. I've never been in love with anyone before you and it would break my heart if what I tell you makes you not ever want to be with me again."

Charise stared at him, not moving a muscle in her body.

"Baby, I want you to marry me. But I have to tell you that my job isn't as a personal trainer like I told you earlier. Baby, there's no easy way for me to tell you this, but, I'm an actor in pornographic films."

"OOOOOOOHHHHHH" screamed the crowd as they whooped and cheered at the news.

Charice sat in the chair numbly looking at her boyfriend. She looked at the chisled face of the man she shared her heart and body with and fought to continue breathing. She felt the stares and heard the whistles of the audience as they openly reveled in her despair. Her man had never looked so devastatingly gorgeous as he did today. He had on a simple white polo shirt that accented his tanned skin wonderfully. His long wavy jet black hair was pushed back from his face, showing his sincere glowing green eyes as he peered intently into her own dark brown eyes.

In that moment, his breathing halted as his heart pounded ferociously in his chest. It was her eyes. Her eyes weren't the same. They weren't the eyes of his lover & friend. They weren't the eyes of his lady. They weren't the eyes of the woman whose heart he worked so hard to capture and treasure.They were the eyes of a wounded woman. More specifically, the woman he wounded.

Deeply.

Her usual bright reflective and happy orbs were dimmed. His heart lurched as he realized the full gravity of the situation. He realized that he had lost her trust and probably destroyed her love for him. And his heart, the one that she held, began to hurt physically from the loss of the light that was once in her lovely brown eyes.

'Oh my God.' he thought. 'She won't forgive me. My angel won't forgive me. What have I done?' he thought in rapid succession as he tried to process the look on her face and the lsuffocating oss of her once lit eyes. 'The smile in her eyes is gone. She's gone. Oh my God she's gone to me. FUCK!' he thought ferociously as he tried to speak once again, finding his voice absent & lost to his raging thoughts.

Amidst the cheers and jeers of the hungry crowd, Charice closed her eyes. Tears slid down her mahogany brown cheeks and landed softly on her cashmere covered chest. Slowly the jeers died down, as the audience waited in rapt attention for Charice's fight or flight response. She felt Jackson's eyes on her, but she was too busy worrying about breathing, rather than his discomfort to the situation he put them in.

"So Charice, did you have any idea that this was going on?" spoke Jerry calmly to her panic ridden mind.

Her sad eyes flitted to Jerry. The sudden movement caused more tears to spill. She hoarsely replied, "No, Jerry. I didn't know."

"AAAAAWWWW" groaned the still enthusiastic audience.

"Apparently there is more to this story. Jackson, as I understand it, you didn't call the show, but a woman that you know did, because she wanted to 'out' you to your girlfriend. Do you know who this could be?" asked Jerry to a hurting Jackson.

Jackson rubbed a strong hand over his gorgeous face, and bowed his head. After clearing his throat, he replied, "Yes, Jerry. I have a pretty damn good feeling that I know who this is."

"Okay then. Let's meet Misty everyone! Misty come on out!" shouted Jerry over the jeers of the crowd.

"BBBBBBOOOOOOOO!!!"

Misty sauntered out onto the stage reveling in the mayhem she caused. She was anxious to see what woman captured Jackson's elusive, almost non-existent heart. She was surprised that the defeated woman on stage was black, but quickly smiled to cover her shock. 'So he prefers chocolate. I'm surprised by that, but whatever, he'll be mine now.' thought Misty as she walked up to the devastated black woman.

"Just so you know, bitch, I've fucked your man on camera for years." snarled Misty into Charice's face. Before she could blink, Charice yanked hard on Misty's reddish brown hair and landed a quick punch to her eye.

The audience roared in appreciation as the show's producer made the "ding ding ding" sound of a boxing match commencing erupt through the studio's speaker system. Cheers of "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" were heard over the scuffle occuring between the two women. Burly security guards intercepted the women – one holding onto a slightly roughed up Misty and the other pushing Charice in the direction of Jackson.

A stagehand ran on stage while the two women fought to regain control of their breath with two small cups of water. Misty took a sip of her drink before launching it in Charice direction. A couple droplets hit Charice on her chest. Charice launched her water, hitting Misty full blast in the face before charging for the flame haired woman.

Jackson stood dumbfounded watching the humiliating scene unfold. When Charice jumped for Misty again, this time succeeding in tackling the woman to the ground and getting a few kicks and punches into her, he sprang into action.

With more effort than he could have imagine, he helped the security guard pull Charice off Misty. Misty's face was beginning to swell from the connected punches to her eye and lip. Charice fought off the arms wrapped around her waist restraining her. Once she realized that they belonged to Jackson, she turned around and slapped him as hard as she could.

Once her palm connected with the stubble of his cheek, the audience gave an audible gasp before promptly cheering for Charice. Once they settled down, Jerry began to talk to the threesome again. "So Charice, I take it you had no idea that Jackson has been sleeping with Misty for money?" asked Jerry in a voice of fake concern.

"No. I was not aware of this, Jerry." responded Charice as she looked into the crowd for Jerry's voice before realizing, with a start, that he was standing close to her on stage. She turned to Jackson, who watched her intently and asked him the million dollar question.

"Why didn't you tell me you make porn?" she stated as simply as possible.

Jackson looked over to the love of his life and found no words in his throat that could make her come back to him. "Baby, I..." he started.

"No. I am not your baby. You don't get the right to call me that." she heatedly retorted before falling silent to hear his response.

The crowd cheered for Charice, it's champion in the sad, sad tale. Jackson looked at her, feeling the sting in his cheek from where her hand hit his face. He finally sighed before saying, "Charice, I've been wanting to tell you what I do for a living for a long time now. When we first met I knew you were different and worth the world, but as we grew closer, I grew more and more frightened of losing you because of what I do for a living."

Charice's eyes burned into Jackson's. If he was a lesser man, he would have flinched at the level of anger and hatred directed at him through her eyes. Before she could respond, Jerry's voice could be heard cutting the silence after the audience "Ooohhhs".

Jerry walked off the stage and was walking around the studio before stopping and turning in Charice's direction to ask the second million dollar question of the segment.

"So Charice, will you marry Jackson?" asked Jerry.

Charice looked at Jackson for a brief moment before looking down at the ground. Her arms were wrapped around her body in a protective stance, her brown sandal heels on the ground nearby her bare feet. She couldn't help the silent tears that slid down her face.

After a tense moment of silence she lifted her eyes to Jerry and simply said, "No."

Jackson waited with baited breath to know what she would do. However her reply to Jerry's question was a death sentence for his heart. He felt it lurch at her response, and walked over to Charice. Once he was close enough to reach out for her, he gave the passionate plea for his heart.

"Charice. Sweetheart, please don't leave me. Having sex with Misty or anyone else doesn't mean anything to me. Only you. It's only ever been you that has meant the world to me. You've given me so much of yourself and I want to give you all of me in return. Please, just give me another chance. I promise to never hurt you again, just please stay with me." said Jackson as he bent down and kneeled in front of her.

Charice let Jackson wrap his arms around her waist and put his head against her soft semi flat stomach. She felt the flutter of his heart pounding against her thigh. She felt her body begin to cream at his touch – and silently cursed her purely pavlovian response. Once she felt his fingers rub small circles across her lower back and away from the prying audience's eyes, she knew she had to put distance between the two of them.

She twisted herself out of his arms, and looked down at him. "I can't trust you Jackson. And I don't respect you anymore. We could have worked through this if you told me the truth. I don't know how, but I know we could have. Now, I can't marry a man that I can't trust. I'm sorry." she said before picking up her heels and walking out of the studio.

Charice navigated the corridors with tears partially blinding her, asking for the direct route out of this new personal hell called the Jerry Springer Show studios. The camera crew followed her as she headed for the green room and out the door. Jerry followed her asking her if she really wanted to leave, which she confirmed for the camera & audience. The audience said their "AAAAWWWW"s to which Charice could neither hear nor care to hear.

As she made her way out the studio, Misty threw an evil smirk at the audience and said "Ha! That's what the stupid bitch gets! Run away little girl!" she cajoled as the audience booed her thoroughly. Chants of "Slut! Slut! Slut!" rose from the angry crowd, to which Misty moved her arms like a conductor. Once the audience realized that she was reveling in the attention, she shouted, "And a damn good one too!" The audience continued booing Misty, before falling silent to watch Jackson's movements.

Jackson slowly rose to his feet before locating a chair and burying his head in his hands. The audience saw his anguish and tried to console him with a reassuring "AAAAAWWWW". Jackson looked up, with reddened eyes and peered at Misty. The slut looked quite pleased with herself. She also settled into a chair, and was bobbing one stick thin leg up and down in the air suggestively.

"So, it's just me and you Jacky baby. Whatcha wanna do? Hmmm?" asked Misty coyly.

"You and your builshit lost me the love of my life! How can you even proposition me when my life is in shambles? How can you even look at yourself and consider yourself a decent human being?" shouted an angry, frustrated Jackson.

The audience cheered at the same moment Jerry came back from the backstage area. Chants of "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!" resounded through the walls. New chants of "You suck! You suck! You suck!" arose from the crowd, directed at Misty. She responded with a hearty "Well DUH! I get paid to do it good too!" to the audience. A few of the men cheered at this while the majority of the crowd booed and shook their heads.

Misty looked over at a despondent Jackson. She took his anger in stride. Secretly, she liked when he was ticked – it meant that he did feel something and didn't just bottle up his emotions like most of the one dimensional dicks she fucked. She kept her composure waiting for him to calm down some.

She sighed and said, "Jack, you know I've liked you. If anyone should be with you, by your side, it should be me. I understand you. I know you. Hell I've probably fucked you more times than that other bitch..." was all she could get out before Jackson lept out of his seat and walked away from her heading after Charice.

The boisterous crowd roared their approval of Jackson chasing after his woman. He, on the other hand, could care less what a bunch of emotionally starved individuals looking to revel in another person's despair and grief could care to feel about his crumbling life.

Misty's calls to him of "Jack! Jackson! Where the hell do you think you are going?" went unnoticed by him. He was a man on a mission: to get back the woman whose love he had lost.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

A cool breeze hit Charice's face as she exited the studio doors and looked for the rental car that she brought to arrive for the show. She stilled for a moment to compose herself and her thoughts. Lifting her face to catch the warmth of the morning sun and the chill of the autumn winds, she breathed deeply to center herself before making the drive back to the hotel to begin gathering the shambles of her once perfect life.

She slipped on her shoes and strode over to the vehicle, shivering slightly at the cool air temperature. She almost made it completely to the car before she heard Jackson's voice carry through the winds. Figuring that she must be in a daze or deep depression, she ignored the calls. Just as she was about to close the driver's door on the rental car, she heard the harsh breathing of a male body and knew, without looking that Jackson was standing there in her door.

Struggling for breath from his flight from the studio, he reached their rental car just before she closed the drivers side door. He stood there, all chisled 6'4" of masculine perfection panting and sweating, holding the door open to prevent his heart from leaving him.

He crouched down to look up at her. She simply stared straight ahead. A tear leaked from her left eye and glided down her soft dark brown cheek. He reached up to brush her tear away and she flinched from him. If he didn't think his heart was broken before, then it surely was now. Tears that threatened to spill from his celery colored eyes finally did.

In a broken voice he asked her to listen to him. He looked down for a moment after she refused to respond to his request. "Charice. I know I messed up. Big. But I need you in my life. You're my heart. I'll do anything to make it right between us. Please, forgive me of this and I promise to be the man who will take care of and provide everything you need." said Jackson in a hoarse voice filled with emotion.

Charice sighed, and put her head down. After a while, she found her voice and mumbled, "I, I can't. It isn't just the humiliation of finding out what you do for a living. It's the fact that you didn't trust me enough to love you through that kind of news. Saying you love me doesn't show it when things like this happen."

"Baby, I know..." started Jackson before Charice held her hand up to him. "No, J, you don't. I had to learn from one of your co-workers that you fuck other people on camera. If you had told me that in the privacy of our own home..." said Charice before her emotions caused her to choke back the freely flowing tears issuing from her almond shaped eyes.

She closed her eyes for a moment and blew out a harsh breath before continuing. "If you told me at home then we would have been able to work it out. Knowing what you do for a living hurts like hell. Knowing that you have shared your body with others for money is plain hard to get over. But I loved you. I would have prayed about it and gotten through it. The most important person in my life was you. Now, I, I, I don't know." stated a broken Charice.

Jackson's hopes of reconciliation crumbled hearing her voice their relationship in the past tense. He knew he had only himself to blame for the shambles of their relationship. Thing was, he couldn't and wouldn't let her go. She had to know that he would make things ok. That he would make it alright. As Charice sat there slightly despondent, he noticed that she still had the car keys in her hand. Thinking on the spur of the moment, he grabbed them from her.