**Hey guys. Sorry for the delay in Chapter Seven. A lot of stuff just kept me occupied..well, here it is. Hope you like it ** L.S**
CHAPTER 07
"Donny?" she breathed, she wasn't sure if she should be scared or relieved. She wanted to be relieved because it was Donny, not some psychotic killer on the prowl, but the look in his eyes, that of pure anger, uncensored pain, and raw, intense rage, made the hairs on her skin rise, it had been a while since she saw him like this, five years to be exact. The sight made her aware of how huge he was as opposed to her much smaller size for the first time in years, this awareness was escorted by a sense of fear.
"Wh...what are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you." she said with a nervous smile.
He wanted to scream at her, his entire body shook with the rage that threatened to explode and rip them both apart. He had come here to apologize for his childish behavior after his father had told him in no uncertain terms that bitching and sulking would get him nowhere with women. Choosing to wait for her in her absence, he had used his spare key to get in and had been here for over an hour now. He had gone to investigate the car pulling up to the apartment and had gone frozen in shock when he saw Kachi step out from the expensive-looking car with a tall, blonde-haired guy who he instantly knew to be Jeremy, his eyes grew dark and his hands balled into fists when he saw him pull Kachi to his body and kiss her the way HE had always wanted to kiss her. He barely resisted the urge to fling the door open, storm his way to them, and pummel that bastard until he was certain he was fit for the ICU.
He didn't know what prompted him to, but he found himself looking her over, taking her in, she looked exquisite, he wasn't even aware she was this pretty, he got a hard on just looking at the fit of the dress he got her....that thought suddenly deflated his erection, HE had gotten it for her, he felt the rage return in full force.
"I came to apologize." he ground out unintentionally.
She shivered at the sound of his voice, but she managed to give a lean smile despite her uneasiness, "You shouldn't have bothered, you didn't offend me." she wasn't sure how trued that was, technically, he really hadn't offended her.
"You look beautiful." he said genuinely, the anger in his voice slowly dissipating.
"Thank you."
He reached out and brushed her cheek with his thumb affectionately, he noticed her flinch, she seemed a bit jumpy. His hand left her cheek and took her wrist, with one tug she was so close to him he could smell the scent of strawberry and cinnamon off her, he licked his lips, she smelt inviting. She looked up at him with fear and apprehension in her eyes- those were the wrong emotions, whenever he envisioned this moment, he had seen passion, desire, lust and love in her eyes, she wasn't supposed to fear him- well he was going to do something about those emotions.
Kachi saw it coming, but it didn't stop the shock of Donny kissing her, her eyes widened feeling his lips move gently along hers like he was using them to study the planes of her fuller lips. She kept her lips tightly shut hoping he would get the message and retreat without her having to push him away. Instead, he bit her lower lip, not hard enough to draw blood, but hard enough to sting so that she let out an "ow!" long enough for his tongue to execute it's invasion and slither into her mouth. Donny was a good kisser, but she was too shocked to notice.
She wasn't responding. Dammit! She wasn't responding! She was so rigid in his arms, it was like he was making out with a blow-up doll, this was NOT how it was supposed to go, she was supposed to kiss him with fervor, wrap her small arms around his neck, wrap her legs around his him, she was supposed to freaking dry hump him! He wrapped a possessive arm around her waist and pulled her closer so that she could feel his erection.
The feel of the bulge in his pants was a signal to Kachi that this had gone on for too long. She steeled a grip on his shirt and tried to push him away unsuccessfully, the man was twice her weight if not more, she tried again, but still he didn't budge. With that option lost, she did the next best thing- wrenched her lips away.
"Jesus Christ! Donny, no!" she said when he tried to take kiss her again.
"No?" he asked almost pleadingly.
She slowly moved away, "Donny, I can't...we can't..."
"We can't what?" he cut in.
"You're my best friend" she said softly, she couldn't think up a more convenient way to express her disapproval of what had just gone on between them without intensifying the hurt already registered in his eyes. She hated to see him like this, it was even worse that tit was her fault.
His last nerve finally broke at that comment, he had dreaded this all these years; those were the words he feared would leave her lips when he finally confessed his feelings for her, 'best friend' why did that title suddenly sound like a death sentence of some sorts? For nine years he had carried it proudly like a medal of honor, cherished it, basked in the glory of knowing he wasn't just one of her unimportant at-the-moment buddies, he actually had some worth in her life. Now the title seemed worthless, it's value obsolete, what exactly did one gain from being a best friend other than being more or less a 24/7 therapist who worked for free? In her eyes, he was just another guy, not 'the' guy, he could never have her the way he wanted, his role was pointless; he would always remain the spare. He didn't want that role, he wanted Jeremy's, he wanted what he had- HER.
"So?" he asked simply, she stared back at him doe-eyed, that didn't exactly help matters, "So, I'm not good enough, is that it Kachi? I'm not fucking good enough for you?" he asked, his temper- and voice rising.
She shook her head vigorously, "no, no Donny, that's not it."
"Then what is it?" he asked softly. She said nothing, causing him to smile, it wasn't a jolly smile, but a sad one, "Nine years, nine fucking years Kachi, I have loved you! Do you have any idea how much torture I went through watching you date one guy after another..."
"Donny..."
"Don't you dare interrupt me, don't fucking dare it!."
She went mum at his outburst, now visibly trembling with fear, the look in his eyes sent chills down her spine, she had never seen him like this, sure he had lost his temper a few times, but never with her, mostly guys who wouldn't let her be.
His sudden outburst reminded her again that Donny wasn't small by any stretch of the imagination. Her eyes went to his bulging biceps, his broad chest and shoulders, features that could either evoke arousal or fear. She had once thought them attractive, she wondered if they could be just as well harmful. She shook her head, no, Donny would NEVER harm her, and if he did, she had three elder brothers that would make sure he never made use of those hands for the rest of his life.
He made a step toward her and she stepped back, her eyes were filled with tears that threatened to fall. His softened, this was not his intention, he never wanted to make her cry or remotely hurt her, "Kachi." he began, "Don't cry, please."
She couldn't stop the tears that dropped from her eyes, "You're scaring me." she said almost inaudibly in an unsteady voice.'
Those words from her put an end to his rage, that was the last emotion he wanted to evoke in her, one of fear, he was supposed to be her protector not her tormentor, the cure and not the poison, "No, no, please, never." he said as he pulled her petite body to him and wrapped her arms around her, holding her the way he used to when she came crying over one douche bag or the other- this time though, he was the douche bag.
"I don't want to scare you Kachi, I would never hurt you, you know that." he whispered soothingly into her ear. She trembled in his arms, her tears now pouring out in full force, he patted her head and rubbed her back as he condemned and chastised himself for making the erroneous decision of confessing his feelings to her when he was in a bad mood, it had done neither of them any good, rather, it hampered any future chances he may have had to tell her how he felt.
Twenty minutes of her weeping and his consoling later, she calmed down in his arms, they were now sitting on a couch they had watched countless movies on together, his arm was wrapped around her shoulders, her head lay on his chest, and one arm slung across his torso, her eyes were red and her throat dry from all her crying.
They were both silent, the only noise coming from within. His thoughts were filled with ways to remedy an already terrible situation, formulating damage control, even while he knew in his heart of hearts there was nothing for him as far as an intimate relationship with her went, and struggled to accept it.
Hers were filled with thoughts if his confession, if he was being truthful if it was really love and not a misplaced feeling like infatuation, and of it was, what next? She didn't want to lose her best friend, but she couldn't imagine how awkward things would be between them after today.
She thought briefly about Phi and her many suspicions, how come she hadn't seen all of this? Had she been so engrossed in her own selfish desires that she hadn't taken note of Donny's feelings for her? Her mind began replaying those many scenes when he has shown her more affection than should have been normal which she had conveniently ignores, the holding of hands, the hugs which went on for a second too long, the kisses against the temple, the many fights he had been in with guys on her behalf, including the one with a very insistent guy in college who had damn near harassed her sexually, that resulted in the guy being in a coma for three days and three months of jail term and eight of probation for Donny, after he literally pummeled the guy to unconsciousness. Thoughts of college brought to mind Matilda, Donny's ex, had she been the cause of their break-up? She remembered the glares Matilda shot her, the cold attitude and envious looks, had she somehow been a pawn in Donny's quest to gain her affections?
She felt like punching herself, how could she not have known? Even those speeches he would give her concerning loving in silence, the raw emotion that lay in his voice when he would tell her he loved her and she would reciprocate playfully, they had all been hints, and she in all her self-centeredness had always thought him as one of her brothers- only white and easier to get along with.
"I'm sorry." she said in a croaky voice.
"I'm sorry too." he replied, breaking out of his thoughts.
"You should have told me earlier."
He shook his head, "It would've just hastened the inevitable, if you didn't notice despite my actions, you would never have loved me like that anyways."
She looked up at him, momentarily shocked by his words, "How do you know that? We could have tried."
"No, you could have tried, if I had told you, you would have pitied me, dated me out of pity and probably even married me out of pity, I would rather not have you than cause us such suffering."
She returned to her position knowing he was right, there really was no point arguing with that
"Do you love him?" he asked after a few minutes of silence.
