It was an error. A mistake. A stuff up.
'I'm here for the party,' the chap said when Sharon answered the door.
'The party?'
'Yes.' And then, perhaps realising that the house behind Sharon was remarkably quite for somewhere that a party was supposed to be taking place, the chap frowned slightly and looked at his watch. 'Am I... am I early?' he asked.
'Early?'
'Yes. For the party. I thought that it started at seven.'
'What party?' Sharon asked.
'You know... the... umm, party. Nod-nod, wink-wink.' The chap reached inside his jacket pocket and produced a folded invitation which he held up for Sharon to see.
Sharon shook her head. 'No party here. Not that I know of. Wrong address perhaps?' she suggested.
'Wrong address?' The chap peered past Sharon at the number on the door behind her, and then he looked again at the invitation. 'Oh. Yes. Wrong number. Wrong house. Sorry.' And then he added: 'But this is Newton Place, right?'
Sharon shook her head. 'Newton Place? No. I'm not even sure I know where Newton Place is,' she said.
'Oh. So... not even close then?'
'Probably not,' Sharon told him.
The chap nodded and looked at the invitation again. And then he put the invitation back inside his jacket. 'Yes. Well... I'm sorry to disturb you,' he said. He was just about to turn away when he frowned slightly and said: 'Look, I, umm... I hope you don't mind me saying this, but I notice that you're... well... naked.'
Sharon smiled. 'Yeah. I am,' she said. 'Nice of you to notice.'
The chap nodded. 'Are you normally? Naked, I mean.'
'Normally?'
'Well... do you normally dress -- or not dress -- like this?'
'Not
all
the time,' Sharon said. 'Not so much in winter. But at this time of the year.... It's quite nice being naked when the weather's a bit warmer.'
The chap nodded again. 'Yes. It's been rather pleasant today, hasn't it? I got up this morning, had a shower, and got dressed -- as normal -- but perhaps I didn't need to. Perhaps I could have just stayed as I was. Perhaps I could have just stayed naked. Perhaps I could have just... well... as I say: stayed naked. You know. Just pretended that I was at one of those nudist resort places. One of those beaches. Or whatever.'
'Perhaps you could have,' Sharon said. 'Sometimes it's nice to get dressed -- dressed
up
, even -- but at other times....'
'Yes, it would probably have been a good day to be naked,' the chap said. 'A good day to have just let it all hang out -- if you see what I mean. Although, of course, I would still have had to get dressed to come out this evening. I would still have needed to get dressed to catch the bus.'
Sharon nodded. 'Probably,' she said.
'I hope that you don't mind me saying,' the chap said, 'but being naked suits you. You, umm... wear it well, as they say. You look good. You look sexy.'
'Thank you,' Sharon said.
'You have nice breasts. Nice boobs. And a nice bush. I do like a woman with a bit of bush.'
'Yes. The bloke that's writing this story does too,' Sharon said.
'Story?'
'Yes. I'm in a story. Didn't you realise?'
'Oh. No. I didn't. Although I suppose that I should have. There was a sign somewhere, wasn't there?' And then he said: 'Does this mean that I'll be in the story too?'
'You could be,' Sharon told him. 'Unless you get cut out in one of the edits. Although I don't think that you will be. Cut out, I mean.'
'I don't think that I've ever been in a story before,' the chap said. 'Have you?'
'I have. Yes.'
'What was it like?'
'It was fun. A bit weird. But fun. I got to go to a supper at a castle. With some toffs who were into seriously kinky stuff. And I had to wear a corselet. And no knickers.'
'Oh? Does the bloke writing this story like corselets?'
'I think that he must do,' Sharon said. 'The old-fashioned open-fronted kind.'
'And he likes bush.'
Sharon nodded. 'He's an older chap,' she said. 'I don't think that he ever took to the bald pussy look. But that's OK with me. I quite like a bit of natural bush too.'
The chap nodded.
Look... are we going to stand out here all night?' Sharon asked. 'Or do you want to come inside?'
'I don't know. What do you think?'
'I think it's starting to get a bit chilly standing here on the doorstep, that's what I think.'
The chap nodded. 'OK,' he said.