Chapter 5
After the shower, Rick, Jessica, and I were all a bit drained and we drifted off to sleep in each other's arms. We must have slept for an eternity, or so it felt, because I awoke to a good season or so ahead of what we had watched. We would have to circle back and not just for Jessica's benefit. I really got back into the Walking Dead and so did Rick from the way I could tell, even if we all joked that the love triangle should have just become a throuple.
"Oh, damn, what time is it? We've definitely overslept! Father Clay is likely rather worried, if none of the others. He's the new priest and doesn't know us as well. The others probably worry less, because it's just a fluke in their minds. In any case, we're going to Hell now, anyway, so what's the point, right?" Rick observed as Jessica started breakfast for the three of us.
Not two minutes later, there was a knock at the door and I rushed to put on something in which to answer it. Nina grabbed my face and just started kissing me before I pulled her inside. Then she grabbed her purse and a swabbing kit, among other things. The look on her face spoke volumes as she simply swabbed her own tongue for traces of my DNA. That was rather clever of her, though I wasn't sure if the results would be reliable. I ran and opened four cans of soda and downed mine quickly to leave her the backwash in case that helped.
"Okay, that helps. I know what you said before, but can I get a proper swab, just in case. Pretty please?" Nina pouted, making me yield this once at least.
Now she had multiple sources of my DNA that she could easily store, just in case. When the baby was far enough along for amnio, or when it was born, she could quietly test for paternity now. My best guess was amnio, since it would make a decision over abortion versus going to term an informed choice. We all sat down and Jessica started making an omelet for Nina, too, much to her surprise. The biggest shock was when Rick poured some wine for each of us.
"Merlot ... with breakfast, eh? Okay, someone doesn't want me to leave at all today, do they?" Nina licked her lips as she sipped her fine dry red.
"Nope," I winked at her, "just put the DNA in the freezer for now. There's space. It won't get corrupted that way, I think. I meant what I said before. Part of me wishes that it was mine, part of me that it wasn't."
"We'll know soon enough, won't we, Nina?" Jessica commented, "what does your woman's intuition honestly tell you, though?"
"That it's Bruno's. And right now, to be frank, I want it to be. Just to wipe the smug look off Matt's face. I would love to rub it in, if you will. Why? I'll tell you why. Because the son of a bitch threw my cheating on Steve with him in my face, that's why! Just this morning, during an argument over something else, he called me a whore and said that if he ever caught me with another man, he'd kick me out.
"I told him that I was good enough to marry, good enough to pursue while dating another man, and good enough to cheat on his then girlfriend Emily with back then, so why was he putting me down? You know what he told me? That I was just a fucking starter wife and that he was clearly just a starter husband. He actually accused me of doing that to him! And then he accused me of fucking your Uncle Vito on the side!
"Oh, I was so fucking livid! I lit into him, accused him of cheating on me with Emily, which he didn't deny. Frankly, I was a hypocrite to mention it, but so was he. I mean, I am jealous, but I can't judge that too much, since I've cheated on him, too. It just makes me feel as if I'm not worthy to be his wife to have him call me those things!
"Oh, I am furious right now! He hurt me badly, very, very badly! Cheating I can understand, you know. Cheating is normal! Half of all couples have at least one cheater! But marrying with no plan to stay together? What the fuck is the point if you're going in expecting to divorce? It's so stupid, it's fucking batshit insane!" Nina ranted now, tears pouring down her cheeks.
"There is, sadly, a class of folks who do that. Jerks, if you ask me. Just as it's wrong to throw your infidelity with him in your face when it was with him! I would never do that to you, I hope that you know that, right? I would expect you to share me, at least with these two and my cousin Lauren, those I would definitely at least want to grandfather in, if nothing else.
"But you could stipulate the same for Steve and Matt, just so that you know, even if we were otherwise, well, monogamish or whatever. That's a big if ... and it assumes a lot of things. This is all theoretical, of course," I told Nina, whose eyes bugged out like saucers.
"You ... you ... you would marry me? Knowing what a cheating slut I am? I mean, face it, there would be no point in setting restrictions like that for you, because, candidly, I could never promise to stick to any set of rules at all. You wouldn't feel like a cuckold or wimp or anything of the sort?" Nina wiped her tears away with a Kleenex that I gave her.
"Ask Rick if he feels like a cuck or wimp, doing our little Devil's triangle arrangement. Go ahead! Ask Jessica if she feels like a cuckquean right now. Go ahead! Or Lauren, for that matter, if and when she shows up. I can't marry Jessica. She's already got a husband. Rick. I can't marry Lauren. She's my cousin. I'd let her move in with me. I'd let you move in with me, too, if you preferred, but that's another issue.
"I'm what some call a 'manwhore,' but I don't let it get me down. As Tywin Lannister liked to say, 'A lion doesn't concern itself with the opinions of sheep.' I am a free man, freely enjoying the bodies of others with their freely given consent. I have done nothing wrong in my book. Yeah, you thought that you were lousy Catholics, guys, for sharing me, but what does my attitude tell you?
"So what if you're an adulteress? I'm an adulterer! We're a great fit together, don't you think? I don't care if I'm excommunicated. Fuck that noise! Get a divorce, get an annulment, I don't care! Sure, I'd marry your sweet ass, though you being my boss could get tricky," I chuckled now.
"You know that I'm not Catholic, right? I'm Assyrian. Somewhat different rules, but I don't care. I'm very ... very ... tempted by your offer, though as you said, my being your boss could complicate things more than a little. Perhaps we should broach the matter with your Uncle Vito. Perhaps not. Let's keep it ... as an ace in the hole. An option if things keep going south with Matt. I like to know that I have a backup plan, if that's ... not too insulting to you," Nina phrased things very carefully so as not to hurt my pride or feelings.
"There's also Steve, but yes, I'm okay with it being a backup plan, a plan B," I smiled at her, even as I felt arms around my neck rather suddenly ... very lean, sinewy arms.
"Yes, well, I hope that she's okay with me living here, because I've decided to move in with you, cousin. No one will worry, since we're related and who would guess that we're intimate. We'll just explain that we're kin. People will mostly drop it after that. The fact that 'my' bed will be vacant a lot is none of their damn business. I got my reasons, chief of which is to keep you healthy and active, not slouching toward couch potatodom and an early grave.
