Jenny and Jac

Chapter 19

LIFE AFTER JACK

Despite the fact that I was not some young impressionable teenager but the sensible mother of two lovely girls trapped in a loveless marriage, I felt foolish now as I began to realise how Jack had manipulated and used me to fulfil his own selfish fantasies. I had believed him when he said he loved me and done things that I would never have done if it had not been for him encouraging me and egging me on.

The final realisation was when I discovered that he had been lying to me. It was after the last time we were together. He had returned home to England and I was missing him badly and impatient for him to come back as soon as possible. We still exchanged emails regularly and he kept telling me to try and be patient and that he missed me too but he could not return for at least four months.

It was during those long four months that I received an email from the small country hotel where I had stayed with Jack and had been encouraged by him not only to seduce the young son of the owner but to let him fuck me.

The email was quite formal and although addressed to me it opened with "Hi Jack, hope you enjoyed your stay with us last week. I'm still amazed by the ease with which you persuaded my ex girlfriend; yes we split up just after; to be so uninhibited when we made the video of her. Please find a copy attached."

My heart was pounding as I clicked on the attachment and started to watch the video. Tears started to roll down my cheeks almost immediately as I watched the opening scene.

The hotel owner's son Jin introduced his girlfriend who I recognised from a photo he had shown us whilst Jack and I were there last time. She still looked very innocent but was stark naked, smiling at the camera and standing next to an equally naked Jack who was looking pleased with himself as she gripped his fully erect penis in her hand. I felt completely betrayed but instead of just stopping the video I felt compelled to keep watching. In the next scene there was either a fourth person operating the camera or it had been set up on a tripod. I concluded later that it was on a tripod because it did not pan or zoom, it just showed Jack and Jin, both naked and erect, moving the girl around in a succession of indecent and revealing poses, with Jack groping her young breasts and fingering her pussy. Finally, feeling like I could not bear any more I watched the girl bend forward and take Jin's erection into her mouth as the man that I thought loved me and had told me he could not visit for a while, looked at the camera with a huge self satisfied grin, entered her from behind and fucked her.

I felt totally betrayed and devastated. I forwarded the email with its attachment to Jack and told him that never wanted to see him again. I then deleted the email account that we had used for many years and set about trying to forget him and how foolish I had been.

As the years went by there were no more lovers although Tom, the art class teacher and camera club leader kept in touch regularly.

My life changed back to being a normal boring mother and wife. I concentrated more on my work and also put more effort into being there for my daughters who were now teenagers.

I even tried again with my marriage but although I was now more tolerant toward my husband he was still unable to satisfy me like Jack used to do in bed and insisted it was because I was useless and frigid.

My sexual gratification was confined to masturbating; often feeling ashamed as I visualised some of the things I had done with the encouragement of Jack; ashamed but always resulting in an earth shattering orgasm.

I was rapidly approaching fifty and began to realise that I had finally got over Jack. In fact, I realised that I had got over him some time ago and now, although I felt embarrassed by the memories of what I had done back then I just dismissed that part of my life as wild but valuable experience.

It was during a recent masturbation session that I started to admit to my self that if the opportunity should arise I would quite like a little wild adventure again. I missed the excitement of knowing I had aroused a man. If I was being totally honest I missed the intimacy of being penetrated and feeling the warmth and weight of a man on top of me. However, I realised that at nearly fifty years old, although still quite fit, my body was not quite as it was twenty years ago and maybe that made me less attractive.

I find that sometimes coincidences in life happen at the right time and one day, not long after my realisation of life passing by Tom called me.

"Hi Jenny, how are you?"

"I'm fine," I replied, "getting older but OK."

I could sense him hesitating and could not resist teasing him saying, "What's on your mind Tom, I can sense that you want to ask me something."

"You remember the camera club?"

"How could I forget?" I said, actually blushing as I remembered the things I had done there whilst posing naked for them all.

"I was wondering," said Tom tentatively, "if you would be willing to be our model again?"

I felt a spark re-ignite somewhere deep in me as I teased him, "clothed or unclothed?"

Tom hesitated again before replying, "Let's say, partially clothed, at least to begin with."

Now it was my turn to hesitate before replying, "Tom I'm flattered that you should think of me but there must be other younger women with better figures who could pose for you. Besides I don't feel that I could face the club members again knowing that they had all seen the way I behaved and the things I did the last time."

"Actually Jenny, with one exception the other men have all left the club and now we have mostly new members."

"Surely one of their wives or girlfriends would be willing to pose for you all?"

"We've tried asking but they all found excuses," said Tom.

"The answer is still no Tom. I feel less confident than I might have been all those years ago and my body is not as firm and young as you might be remembering."

"I'm sure you are still in good shape though Jenny and as sexy as ever, please reconsider."

"No," I replied, "even with your flattery!"

"Then please promise me you'll think about it seriously and if you change your mind give me a call in the next week or so."

I paused, remembering the excitement I had felt the first time I posed for his art class. The feeling I got when I first shyly exposed my breasts to the men of the art class and seeing the look in their eyes as they gazed at me and started to sketch me.

"OK, I'll think about it Tom but I'm sure the answer will still be no."

"Thanks Jenny, look forward to hearing from you soon," he said and then we both said goodbye and hung up.

I was alone in the house and could feel the warm glow from the spark that Tom had re-ignited just now.

I walked to my bedroom, undressed and stood in front of my full length mirror. Like most women I guess, my own body image was quite negative and I was not keen on what I saw. My breasts were probably a little larger that when I had posed for Tom all those years ago but so were my belly and my hips. I then turned sideways and checked my profile; my breasts had drooped a little and my belly swelled a little. Ever since my split with Jack I had stopped having my pubic hair waxed and these days I just trimmed it occasionally to keep it neat. I didn't like my bum either; not so much the size but the way it looked like it had drooped. For a brief moment I imagined I was in front of Tom's camera club friends, naked and posing as they asked me to move this way and that, but then dismissed the thought and any ideas of calling Tom to tell him that I'd changed my mind. I got dressed again and then went to the kitchen and started to prepare the evening meal.

A few days had passed since Tom's phone call and I could not shake the idea from my head of posing once more for him and his friends. Just the idea of it reminded me of how shy I had felt the first time and I knew that I would feel the same again. However, no matter how hard I tried, the memory of how, despite my natural shyness, I enjoyed the enthusiasm of the men as they all gazed at my naked body would not go from my head.

Finally, one evening whilst alone I made my decision. I picked up my phone and dialled Tom's number. Just dialling the number and knowing what I was about to tell him made me feel ten years younger.

He answered the phone and, sounding like a giggling schoolgirl I blurted out, "Ok Tom, I'll do it. I'll pose for you and your camera club."

There was a long pause, long enough for me to start changing my mind before Tom said, "Oh Jenny, that is great news, can you make next Saturday evening?"

"So soon!" I said, "OK, what time?"

"Shall we say seven?"

"Yes, OK," I replied and then felt embarrassed as I said, will the fact that I no longer wax be a problem?"

My face actually flushed bright red on the other end of the phone as Tom said, "So you are prepared to show us your pussy again then!"

There was an awkward pause before he continued, "No, actually a more natural look will help with the theme we have in mind."

I didn't ask what the theme was and just said, "OK, Tom I'll see you Saturday evening at seven."

"That will be great I'm looking forward to it. Oh, and by the way, don't worry about clothes or underwear for the session, we'll supply everything."

We said our good byes and then I hung up.

I was already having doubts as soon as I put the phone down but deep down I felt growing desire to do something completely out of character again; something exciting and different from my everyday life.

Saturday was soon upon me and I felt guilty telling my daughters that I was going to visit some old school friends for a reunion dinner in the evening. I tried to imagine how they would react if they knew the truth and that their mother was going to meet a group of men and take her clothes off for them. Just the thought of them finding out nearly stopped me going but later, as I had a long hot shower I knew that I would do it. I had no idea what Tom had in mind but knew he would push me as far as he could. I ran my hand through my recently trimmed pubic hair and brushed my fingers over my labia knowing that if I was still brave enough I would soon be showing the men how neatly trimmed I was.

Finally, having had a shower and got ready I said my goodbyes to my daughters and left the house. The camera club was only a fairly short drive away and I was soon parking the car around the back of the building. I sat there for a while building up my courage and then locked the car and walked over to the entrance door and rang the door bell.

I could hear someone coming down the stairs inside and then Tom opened the door and greeted me warmly saying, "Welcome Jenny, please come in. I was worried that you might have changed your mind."

"I nearly did!" I said, "But here I am."

"Please follow me upstairs Jenny and I'll introduce you to the other club members."

I was curious as to why Tom was wearing what I would soon discover were period 1900's clothes.

As we climbed the stairs my heart was pounding as I could hear the buzz of male conversation from the room above. When Tom opened the door the room fell silent as we both entered.

The room was much the same as I last remembered with the raised stage in the centre surrounded by lights and tripod mounted cameras.

I looked around at the male faces and felt nervous. They were all dressed in a similar way to Tom.

Unlike the last time most of the men here were just my age or younger. I'm not sure why but I had always felt more comfortable with older men. Maybe I thought they were more polite or perhaps less critical of female imperfections.

They all looked quite friendly standing around drinking as Tom said, "Gentlemen, let me introduce Jenny who has agreed to be our model for tonight's session."

While he was speaking I felt as though I was being undressed by all of them as I watched their eyes roaming over me from head to toe, trying no doubt to undress me in their minds.

"I felt shy as I said, "Hello, I hope you will be patient with me as it has been many years since I did anything like this."

One of them passed me a glass of wine and said, "Please don't worry, we have all evening and we are all looking forward very much to having you as our model."

All of the men were charming and polite and made me feel welcome and as I chatted to them I kept feeling twinges of awkwardness and shyness knowing that, unlike a regular social gathering, I would at some stage be naked in front of all them; naked and who knows what else!

We all stood chatting for a while. I guess that Tom wanted me to have a couple of glasses of wine before starting, to help me relax. The wine was definitely having a good effect and I was soon laughing and joking with the men; feeling quite relaxed now in their company.

I watched Tom go and fetch a photo album and when he returned he came up to me and said, "Tonight, with your help, we want to try and recreate erotic pictures from the early 1900's."

He passed the photo album to me and continued, "look through this Jenny and it will give you an idea of the type of pictures we want to recreate."

I looked at the title "A Whore of the 1900's" and wondered what I was about to let my self in for. I opened the album and on the first page were a series of pictures showing a young woman undressing. The pictures were all in black and white and the clothes looked something like I remembered seeing my great grandmother wearing in old family pictures of her as a young woman although my great grandmother would have never worn such a revealing blouse.

In the first picture the young woman was wearing a frilly white lace blouse. Her skirt was long and voluminous reaching down to her ankles.

Unlike in my grandmother's day, the woman's naked breasts were barely covered by the blouse. The blouse was acting like a bra, with laces in the front pulling the fabric tightly under her breasts to hold them up. The blouse barely covered her nipples, just a few diaphanous frills covering her modesty, leaving the upper part of her breasts and her shoulders naked.

In the next few pictures the young woman had unfastened the front laces and was showing her breasts to a couple of men.

I suppose I was scared of turning the pages any further than the second where the woman, her breasts still exposed was holding up her skirt to reveal long old fashioned knickers; I think they are called bloomers or drawers, with elongated legs that reached down to just above the tops of some stockings. It was pretty obvious that she would end up naked and perhaps worse. I decided to hand the album back and just go with the flow and see what would happen.

Tom grabbed my hand to get my attention and said, "Are you ready to start Jenny?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," I joked nervously.

"Great," he said, we are keen to re-create scenes similar to the pictures you have just seen a small selection of and then led me over to a small dressing room behind the stage. He opened the door and showed me some vintage clothes on chair. Please undress and then put on everything that is on the chair there. He then actually sounded a little bashful as he said, and please note there is no bra and when the laces of the blouse are tightened under your breasts your nipples should be covered but only just!"

He pointed to a large black and white picture on one of the walls and said, "That is how I want you to wear the blouse."

Tom then walked back to the other men as I entered the changing room and closed the door.

I quickly undressed and then sorted through the pile of clothes on the chair. As I expected Tom and the camera club had managed to find some decent replicas of the clothes, including the drawers that the woman in the picture had been wearing.

As I stood naked in the dressing room the acoustics of the place were such that I could hear the men talking quietly and excitedly amongst them selves. I could not place the voices to the individuals in the room but I overheard one saying, "Tom, do you really think that she will pose for the pictures that we want?"

I then listened intently as Tom said, "from my experience with Jenny the last time she was here I suspect that she enjoys the attention but more importantly for us I have long suspected that she likes to please and do as she is told."

"But she looks so normal, like any number of middle aged mothers I see taking their kids to school."

I was already thinking about Tom's observations of me. I had never really thought about it much but as I remembered some of the things I had done when I was with Jack I began to realise that Tom could be right.

Some of what I had just overheard I had stuck in my mind; 'normal' and 'middle aged mother'.

I was still naked, feeling nervous as I checked out my reflection in a long mirror as one of the other men said, "I'm getting stiff already at the thought of seeing her naked."

I felt a thrill of excitement hearing his words and then heard another say, "I can't wait to see her tits displayed by that blouse she is going to wear."

Just hearing their comments calmed my nerves. Knowing they wanted to see my body somehow reassured me.

I started to pull on the knickers and as I held them up I gasped as I saw that they had no crotch. They were basically two separate legs hanging from a drawstring ribbon that fitted around the waist. They were white with fancy lace work around the bottoms of the legs.

I stepped into the each leg and then pulled them up. Having tied the ribbon waistband with a bow I found that I could slide the tops of the legs around like curtains until they overlapped a little and covered me at the front and the rear.

Next I picked up the stockings. I was expecting nylon like Jack used to ask me to wear but these felt like they were black silk. I looked around for a garter belt but then discovered two lengths of red ribbon. I then remembered the last picture of the woman holding up her dress and seeing the ribbons tied around the tops of her stockings.

I pulled each of the silk stockings up my legs, the ultra fine silk felt quite sensual against my skin. I then tied a red ribbon with a bow around the tops to hold them in place.

Next I pulled on a long pale blue skirt trimmed with white lace. The skirt was very full and finished just above my ankles.

I glanced in the changing room mirror and looked at my reflection. I started to worry that my body was not good enough. My breasts were a little larger than the last time but did not look as firm and to my eyes they had drooped.

I pulled my self together and started to put on the white frilly blouse.

It was really more like a corset and I struggled to position it correctly under my breasts. Eventually I managed to position the shaped top under my breasts and then pulled the lace ribbons tight. As I tightened the laces I could not help but notice how my breasts were forced up and pressed together just like a modern day push up bra but somehow much sexier. It had shoulder straps made with lots of frilly lace but I noticed in the picture hanging on the wall that the woman had slid them down from her shoulders, leaving both her shoulders and upper breasts naked.

My main concern was how little of the white lace covered my nipples. It felt as though my breasts were naked and being presented on a decorative white lace shelf; which I guessed was the main idea. It reminded me in a way of the quarter cup bra that Jack had bought for me all those years ago.

These days I wore my hair longer. I decided to tie it up on top of my head with just a few wispy strands falling over my ears.

Finally I was ready; well I was dressed, I still doubted that I was actually ready to go and face the men and their cameras.