Chapter 1
Have you done much speed dating? It's dumb really. But at least you get to meet women who want to meet men. That's something isn't it? I presumed that at least some of them would want what I wanted, but this turned out a bit tricky.
When Sheila left me, she said it was because 'All you want is sex!'. I ask you. What did she think a man wants from a woman? Why are we made differently? To be honest, Sheila wasn't the only one, just the last in a relatively long line of women who'd walked out on me. Some were open about the reason, others made lame excuses. But I bet it was the same for all of them. 'All you want me for is sex.' Er, that would be 'Yes!'
Sure I want sex. Lots of it. All the time. It's how I'm made. I don't hide it.
So anyway, these experiences had made me wary. No more chasing after time wasters. When I went speed dating, I had my spiel all ready. A couple of minutes of small talk then, if I fancied her, straight to the point:-
"D'you like sex?"
You'd be amazed what happens when you come right out with it. Some of them actually blush. I didn't get my face slapped but I'm sure I would have in a different environment. You'd think it was a crime asking a woman whether she likes sex. As though I was about to rape her, or something.
Exactly the opposite is the case. I couldn't rape a woman if I wanted to, which, of course, I don't. I'm just looking for a female who likes sex. Like any guy. What's so damn odd about that?
Once I ran into a woman who didn't react as though she was confronted by a rank pervert.
"Sure," she said. "Who doesn't?"
I thought I'd finally struck oil, until she continued,
"But not with you, you bastard!"
Hey! That's not fair. I'm not a bastard. I'm a nice guy. Honest. I do know how to treat a woman, and sex for me is not a one-way street. If she's not into it, I'm not into it. That's why I ask. I'm not interested in women who aren't 'into it', who regard sex as some kind of bargaining tool. 'You get laid if I get....' whatever they want, about which they're rarely explicit.
There's a speed dating venue close to where I work. They have sessions most evenings and I attend them all. I keep expecting to hear 'A complaint has been made...', or words to that effect, but never did. Maybe women are simply too embarrassed to relate what I'd said. Whatever, the organizers, only too willing to take my money, probably ignore complaints. I just wish they'd find some women who want what I want. They must be out there.
I know what you're thinking. 'The only place you're likely to find the woman you're looking for is in a bar.' Right? Well you'd be wrong. I should know. There's a bar on the corner of the block, right next to the speed dating venue. I'm there most nights. So I know, see.
Women in bars fall into three categories. One sits down, orders her drink, gets out her cell and starts yattering. You can wait for her to stop until they erect an Eifel Tower in Paris, Texas! Two is looking for a shoulder to cry on. Oh, there's plenty of those, and possibly one or two 'ripe for the picking', if you get my meaning. But that's not me. I'm not a predator out to take advantage of a woman who's emotionally upset. I'm not a predator at all. I just would like to meet a woman who wants what I do -- sex. No complications, just sex.
If you're wondering about type three, those would be looking for a quick quid pro quo, and that is something I'm not into. Is a woman who does sex for money in it because she likes sex, or wants money? Even if both, it's another example of that damn trade off. You get sex if I get....? The only ending to that sentence I'm interested in is 'sex', period!
I'd almost given up when I ran into Angela.
Chapter 2
I spotted her right away. Tall, slender, long legs under a loose skirt, bare ankles, high-heeled shoes. There's usually one catches my eye. But Angela was an eye-catcher par excellence. It was not only her appearance but the way she moved, not flirtatious, but with a sense of assurance, no attempt to mask her femininity. Quite different from most women who attend speed dating sessions. They're either nervous and show it, or are nervous and overcompensate by being 'busy'.
Well, to cut to the chase, I didn't bother using my line on any of the others. Just bided my time until I got my five minutes with Angela. I must have been nervous myself because the encounter went something like this.
"Hi!" Smile.
"Hi!" Smile
Awkward silence.
"Do you like sex?"
I mean, I usually hold it back until around the four minute mark. So the frosty silence that follows doesn't last too long. Maybe I had a premonition that Angela would be different. Well, I'll credit myself with that, even if it isn't true.
A faint smile crossed her features. She did not reply, just looked at me, not aggressive, staring, shocked, or anything like that. She just looked me straight in the eye. Ok. I'll admit it. That made me nervous.
The silence went on. It became clear she was not going to break it.
"Er... Are you going to say something? Or are we done?" I said, eventually.
"I'm waiting for your next line," she responded, evenly.
Cheez!
"Er.. Well. Ok! It's this. I'm not much into speed-dating stuff....Y'know, marking cards, an' all."
I waited to see whether she would respond. She did not. Just kept looking me in the eye, expectantly.
"So, well, if you're interested, I'll be in the bar on the corner after the session. It's quite nice. They have booths. We can talk there.... If you're interested."
I suppose by now my nervousness was palpable. She was so calm. It was as if every guy she'd met asked her whether she liked sex. After a brief pause, she said,
"What's your name?"
"It's ...er .... it's on the card."
"I thought you're not into cards, an' all?" she said, mocking me playfully with my own words.
"I mean your real name," she continued.
"Er... Ron," I stammered. The card said 'James'.
"Well, Ron," the woman turned Goddess opposite me said,
"Are you good at sex?"
"Er.. Well, Yes! I suppose so."
"Suppose so?" Angela repeated. "That's not encouraging."
I found my cojones.
"Ok. Yes. I'm damn good."
"For me, or for you?"
"For both of us."
Brief pause.
"D'you mind if the woman takes the lead?"
"Not at all!" I said, hastily. Then, looking around,
"Maybe we could discuss this in the bar? More private."