Happy 2015! This will be the last chapter of
Irkutsk
. I had no idea when I started this story over a year ago (well before the first installment was posted) that it would take my characters through quite the experiences you have read about. To those of you who have enjoyed reading this tale (even those who have enjoyed it just a little), I thank you for your support, whether by feedback or by adding to my hits. I know my imagination and/or my writing style are not to everyone's liking and I am pleased that words have fallen in part upon good ground.
For those who represent the stony or thorny ground, who did not enjoy the story, I say thank you for visiting, and I hope you find elsewhere what you sought here. I, too, found stories on this site that I did not like, but I also found some genuine diamonds.
For those who did not enjoy this story, but who persisted in reading chapter after chapter and continued to tell me that it was not to their taste, I can only refer to Albert Einstein's famous quote about insanity being defined as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Thank you again to all my readers.
*****
It was the day we were due to cross the equator. I had done this before by ship, and I knew something of the shenanigans that went on. I had discussed it with the Captain, and he had told me we would all be unharmed, except perhaps for our dignity. I then spoke to my Ladies as a group. Most of them had never crossed the line by sea, and they were keen to be treated like any other "pollywogs" or first-timers of the maritime equator.
We had fallen into the habit of sharing meals with the few other passengers on board and those crew not actually on duty, and we were finishing off our dinner. I knew we were scheduled to cross the line just after 7.30 pm, and it was now 7.35. Everything seemed normal on the surface, but I knew my Ladies were a little apprehensive about what was to come. We had been told not to wear good clothes. And then it happened. Two of the senior officers walked up and stood behind me, one each side.
They grabbed my arms and lifted me roughly to my feet. I was frogmarched to the low stage at the front of the dining room, where my shoes, pants and shirt were removed, and I was dressed instead in a grass skirt, a bra made of two half coconuts, and my head was covered with a wig made of dried seaweed. It smelled a little, but not too bad. A weird set of fins ibn the shape of a fishtail was attached to my feet, effectively hogtying me, and I was given a trident and a (real) dead fish to hold.
One member of the crew (the Bosun, I later learned) bowed to me and spoke some words I could not understand, except the single word "Neptune". He put a bucket in front of me, and picked up a piece of wet seaweed out of it, draping it over me saying in English, "Hail, Son of Neptune!"
One by one, everyone in the room followed suit, until my fish, my trident and especially myself were dripping and smelling of seaweed.
Then seven other passengers were arrested as I had been. It was interesting to see that Tina, Astra and Chris were among them, along with four other passengers. Everyone knew that Tina and Astra (at least) could easily have resisted their arrests, and I thought perhaps Chris could too. However, they meekly went along with the game. They too had "wreaths" of seaweed placed on their heads. These were clearly Neptune's attendants.
Seven of the crew danced a strange dance around me, then took my seven attendants, making it clear that they were to follow suit. The fourteen then took fourteen of the others, and twenty eight were dancing around me to strange sounds that started over the PA. Then more and more, until everyone except the Captain was dancing like idiots around me. I felt half honoured and half ridiculed. In some weird way they balanced each other out. The Captain was wearing a very solemn expression, and waving his hands around as if conducting the strange goings-on.
After a while a conga line started. Several crew members left the dance, and two formed an arch, lowering the booms every now and then to capture a victim. Others brought each victim before me, and indicated that I should choose with my trident whether they should go right or left. Those I sent to the right were given a certificate and escorted back to their seats.
Slava was the first I sent to the left, and I noticed that she, and then others I sentenced the same way, were sprayed with a bright green liquid and then assisted the crew, bringing yet more victims to me.
It was not until I had sent three or four victims to be sprayed and the main lights dimmed and a black light strobe started, that I realised the paint was fluorescent. These selected victims glowed intermittently in the dark. And for the fraction of a second each time the black light flashed, Slava's tattooed clothes vanished and she was revealed as naked. Two crew members quickly caught on and brought her a grass skirt and coconut "bra" like mine, and she was respectable again.
Eventually the dance came to an end, and the Captain spoke to us in a very formal voice, telling us in English and then in some strange made-up language that we had all passed the test and were qualified nautical equatorials, or Shellbacks. Certificates were given to those who hadn't already received them, and we all had a good laugh and slowly dispersed. One of the crew members approached me with a wink and gave me a portable light. I switched it on for a moment and it flashed with a black light. I got the message and smiled at him, and he vanished.
Two crew members then removed all the wet seaweed and my dry seaweed wig along with the fish. Then another four crew members lifted me bodily while the Captain removed the fishtail.
Several of my Ladies lifted my "throne" with me still on it, and walked me out of the dining room, bumping my head on the doorway in the process.
As we returned to our cabins, I noticed Slava removing her grass skirt and bra, returning her (in the absence of flashing lights) to her usual appearance. But I had the portable light.