"I'm not sure about this," Ella called to me above the noise of her hairdryer.
"You're the one who agreed to go. If you'd asked me I'd have told you to say we're busy." I shifted on the sofa and flicked aimlessly through the channels full of celebrities I've never heard of.
The hairdryer noise ceased and a few seconds later Ella appeared at the doorway of the living room.
"Going like that are you?" I joked as she pulled her bath robe tighter. She's always been conscious of her body and even though we're married it's still a task to get her naked.
"At least I'd know what I was wearing. I hate fancy dress."
"So you should have said no! Plus it's not fancy dress, it's a costumed masquerade party," I said, reading from the invitation on the coffee table.
"Same thing," she said as she perched on the arm of a chair. "You know I couldn't say no. She's my boss."
"She's not really your boss, is she? She works with your boss."
"Yeah."
"At head office."
"Yeah."
"Where you don't have to see her," I said with a stare that let her know I blamed her for dragging me along.
"I'm going to finish getting ready," Ella sighed and left the room.
I took another glance at the invitation. It didn't give much information other than the theme of Heaven and Hell and an address. Obviously I'd looked on Google maps but all I could see was that it was a big house in a street of big houses. All of which had high hedges and large gates that prevented nosy people like me from seeing much online.
I watched TV for a bit, almost dying of boredom, before the doorbell startled me. I waited for Ella to answer it but soon realised she must have been upstairs.
"I'll get it then," I muttered to myself as I rose from the sofa and went into the hallway.
I opened the door with a smile and an enthusiastic "Hello" and hoped our guests would believe the fake sincerity.
"Hi, you must be Ella's husband. We've heard so much about you," said the woman already pushing past me.
"Nice to meet you," said her companion as he nearly crushed my hand.
"Where is she then?" she asked as she peered in every door she could find.
"Upstairs I think..."
Before I could say Ella would be right down, she had rushed up the stairs.
"You'll have to excuse Collette; she gets very excitable about parties like this. Well, I'm sure we all do." He smiled as though I was part of an in-joke.
"Oh, absolutely." I shut the door and showed him into the living room.
From what I had glimpsed of Collette, she was a reasonable looking woman in her early forties, although she dressed in a way to make her appear more youthful. Her short blonde hair framed her glasses nicely and she seemed to be in decent shape. Not that it had been easy to see under her long coat and the bag she clutched.
"So you've been married for less than a year then?"
"What? Oh, yes. Only a few months," I replied.
He had already sat down in my place on the sofa and was glancing at the TV.
"Married life is great," he said. I still didn't know who he was.
"So you're married to Collette then?"
He looked at me as though I were stupid. "For nearly twenty years now. Can't believe you watch this shit," he said as he pointed to the screen.
"I don't really. It's just there's nothing on."
He picked up the remote and typed in a number. "You don't even have the footy channels? Jesus. I wouldn't let Collette control me like that. Tell you what, you get us a drink and I'll get our costumes ready."
"Yeah, sure." Nobhead.
I went and took as long as I could to get us a beer from the fridge. This was going to be a long night. Still, if it was a big party then we could always sneak away from them. Or maybe just kill him and bury him in the huge garden. I eventually carried the cans through to the living room.
"Jesus," I said as I saw what he was wearing.
"Not quite," he grinned and took a can. He was dressed in a monk's habit. It looked like an oversized brown bath robe tied with rope. "There's yours," he pointed to the other habit on the table.
I put my beer down and picked up the costume. I got my arm halfway into the sleeve before he commented.
"You don't wanna do that. You'll be roasting."
"So you aren't wearing a shirt underneath?"
He scoffed. "Wear as little as possible." He opened his habit to show me what he had on, or rather didn't have on, underneath. All he wore was a pair of white underpants that left little to the imagination. Coupled with a physique that said he regularly frequented the gym it meant I was more than reluctant to strip off.
I removed my shirt and slipped the habit on. Only then did I take off my jeans and socks. Letting him see my slim upper body was one thing but I wasn't going to let him see my boxers or chicken legs too.
With the habit on, I then had to put the sandals on. I hate sandals and they only added to my discomfort.
"Perfect," he said.
I picked up my wallet but caught his gaze which told me I'd made another mistake. "Won't I need it?"
He shook his head. "Drinks are free, you have your ticket."
"What about ID?"
"It's a masquerade party. Surely the whole point is to be anonymous?"
I placed my wallet back on the table. It was probably too late to ask his name so we sat in almost silence drinking and watching what he wanted to. Eventually we heard footsteps on the stairs.
"Is heaven ready to see hell?" Collette called from outside the room.
"Absolutely," her husband replied.
Collette entered almost dragging Ella behind her. I could see why and my eyes went wide at the sight. They were dressed as devils although that was little more than a set of silk horns they wore. Collette had on fishnet stockings, a red corset that fitted well over her small breasts and a black thong. She made a point of giving us a twirl to see her little devil tail. I tried to avoid looking through embarrassment.
Collette's husband wasn't embarrassed to look at her or Ella. She was dressed in things even I struggle to convince her to wear. A black underbust basque covered her stomach beneath a red and black bra. Always self-conscious of her large breasts, Ella had one arm up to cover them but it was futile. She wore black stockings that accentuated her legs. Despite her own thoughts, I've always found Ella's body sexy. Medium height, not too skinny but no real excess fat anywhere. As Collette turned Ella to show her tail, I saw the only victory Ella must have had. The basque had come with a thong but instead she was wearing black French knickers. She looked incredible but it felt awkward that it wasn't only me watching her.
"Come on then, let's get going," Collette said enthusiastically.
She went out first with her husband not far behind. I took the opportunity to pull Ella to one side. "We don't have to go."
"It's a bit late now." I could tell she wanted to stay.
"What if we go but make an excuse to leave early?"
"OK," she nodded.
I picked up my keys and followed Ella outside. Before I'd turned to lock the door, Collette pushed past me, holding Ella's coat that she hadn't managed to get on.
"We're only going from the car to the house and back. It's warm enough to leave it behind."
I looked to Ella who was obviously struggling to think of a reason to protest. "We were going to put our keys in her coat," I said to Collette as she stepped back outside.
She snatched the keys from my hand, locked the door.
"Nonsense. Damien will drive."
I was dumbstruck as she placed the keys behind a plant pot and dragged Ella to the car.
I had hoped the ride would give Ella and me a chance to plot our escape. Instead she was in the back seat with Ella whilst I sat in the front alongside Damien. Quite appropriate really, travelling to a Heaven and Hell party with a man named after the son of the Devil.
From what I could overhear, Collette spent most of the journey telling Ella how wonderful the night would be. For most of the ride I was subjected to Damien showing me every feature of his car, from the music system to the built-in sat-nav and DVD player. Each thing he showed me was followed by me having to tell him our car didn't have it. Apparently if I kept working hard I'd be able to afford a car like his. I think he meant to come across as encouraging and friendly. Instead he seemed smug and annoying. I was almost relieved when we reached the road full of huge houses. All of the gates appeared the same but we soon slowed at one and waited as the gates slowly parted.