4th of July, 1994. I was dating a girl who lived about a hundred miles away, and I went out to visit her.
I should give you a little background here. It may be a clichΓ©, but I attended a "small Midwestern college." One night my junior year, during one of the wild parties that my roommate and I were known for, I met a girl named Emily who went to another small Midwestern college thirty or forty miles away. To keep this short, I'll just say that I spent the next two years trying to fuck Emily, to no avail.
Emily and her roommate Brenda were both about to graduate in May of '94, so they invited me up to help them celebrate. We all got pretty trashed, and Emily wound up passed out on her bed by 11 p.m. Brenda and I decided to take a walk to try and sober up a little bit. We stopped to take in a few minutes of the Naked Coed Soccer Game going on, then continued on to an open stretch of lawn along the small town's Main Street. Again, to make a long story short, we wound up wildly stripping off each others' clothing and fucking doggy-style right there.
So, I wound up dating Brenda, and spending the 4th of July weekend at her small house. Emily and several of their high school friends were also there, and the beer was flowing freely. Eventually, Emily opened her purse and pulled out several joints, which we immediately lit and began passing around.
It was close to Brenda's birthday, and a few of the girls had brought presents. Emily's was a gag gift, an adult coloring book for women. As well as coloring the various scenes, the woman was supposed to draw in her lover's penis. Brenda immediately started doing this, and shocked the other women with the size of her drawing. (Brenda told me nearly every time we had sex that I had the biggest cock she'd ever seen. Unfortunately, she's the only woman who's ever told me that.)
As the 4th turned into the 5th, people started to leave. Eventually, only Brenda, Emily, and I remained. Emily lit another joint, and turned her stoned gaze onto one of Brenda's more flattering portraits of me. "Is it really that big?" she asked suddenly.
"What?" Brenda responded, more than a little stoned herself.