Part Eleven - Senior Year, Fall Semester
It's easy to think of what happened over our senior year and get distracted by the terrorist attack that occurred in March of 2001, but we'll get to that in time, because the fall of that semester had a lot going on to keep us distracted. It was the last autumn I would be coming onto a campus as a student, although I would eventually return to other campuses a few times as a guest lecturer and one time even as a visiting professor, although I don't have any real accreditations in education. I think Oxford decided my writing spoke for itself.
We were all certainly nervous about our last year, because at that end of that year, we all knew we had to go out and make our marks on the world. People would have to go out and get actual jobs, take on real responsibilities and be actual adults.
Of course, the only reason we were worried about any of that was because we were holding ourselves to our already high (bordering on ridiculous) standards and wouldn't accept anything less than what we knew we were capable of, which was
changing
the world, improving it, leaving it a better place than how we found it.
I know what you think of me by this point, Agent Shetterly, but you have got to believe me when I tell you, myself and the rest of the CARP students, we only had the world's best interests at heart. You once described me in your reports as "rather bloodless, more reptile than human, able to weigh the cost of human lives without remorse" and that's true, although perhaps not as true for me as it is for many of my fellow graduates. You know, the ones I asked you to protect? The ones who keep mysteriously turning up dead? There's a reason I didn't trust you with my family, and why the last few years we've been particularly difficult to keep track of - because I'd like my entire family to remain breathing, thanks, and you lot seem to be miserable at that.
Yes yes, I've heard your apologies several times, Assistant Director Caulfield, and they mean as much to me now as they did the first time. I've got a yearbook full of enough dead friends to fill up a cemetery by myself, and you seem to somehow still think a handful of regretful words somehow absolves you of the amount of blood on your hands from your years of inaction.
I assure you, it does not.
You and your fellow FBI agents did not take me seriously when I came to you suspecting something regarding the death of Special Agent Costello. You did not take me seriously when I came to you with my suspicions about Will Bierko's death. I have been
trying
to get you people
ahead
of curve with all of this, and instead, I have been met with derision, mockery and even suspicion that I was the
cause
of all of this, when, in fact, I brought all of it
to
you after Costello's death. So don't tell me to calm the fuck down, lady, because I'm as cold as ice.
When we came back for our senior year, the first thing we got was a letter in the mail reminding us that each Alpha was responsible for their own 'senior project,' an actionable plan on something in our world that we could fix, within our lifetimes, with a reasonable amount of effort. Among the remaining 36 members of the Senior class of Alphas, we would come up with enough influential projects that we would change the face of the world in just fifty years' time.
That was the plan anyway.
It's worth noting that a lot of the senior projects that were put together that year did not rely on the survival of the architect to see them through to completion. In fact, it almost felt like we were a bunch of fatalists, expecting ourselves to die long before our work would come to fruition. I suppose there's something to be said about Dr. Igarashi raising an entire graduating class prepared to martyr themselves for what they believe in.
My plan wasn't so doom-and-gloom; it required me surviving to at least year twenty-five of its implementation.
We'll get to that.
I know what you're most curious about, the prudes that you are, and so I'll indulge your compulsive need to know about my sexual history first. The student rally for returning seniors was an unusual one, simply because we were told that
just
the Alphas were to be there - not to bring any of our partners with us. That came as something of a surprise, because in all the previous years, we'd been encouraged to bring our partners with us. They wanted them to find out when we found out, normally, so the fact that they wanted to do this one differently was more than a bit surprising to all of us. It felt a lot less like a rally and more like a large lecture, especially since this one was being held indoors, unlike all the previous ones, which had been held in the outdoors auditorium.
"Greetings my senior class of Alphas!" Dr. Igarashi said from her confident place on the stage to us. "I've brought you here today to inform you about your final partners, your mental equals. I'm sure you've been giving it some thought over the last few years, and maybe even a few of you have guessed at what I am about to say next, but your final partners... are right here in this room already. For the last few years, we as a faculty have been guiding you towards one another, and now, two different Alphas will join together, intermingling partners, forming one large Squad.
"We've been developing these pairings over the years together, and right now, I'm sure it's coming as no great surprise to you to learn that the Alpha whose suite is across the hall from yours in the dormitories is your new partner. Them and the rest of their team. You've had projects with them for years and because of the nearness of their suite to yours, I'm sure your team and theirs already know each other quite well, on a friendly basis. Well, now it's time for them to become friendlier than that. As always, it is up to you on how you want to intermingle your two teams, but our research has established that variety is the spice of life, and that by offering your existing partners a bit of 'new,' it will help prolong their connection with you as an individual and make the bond between your two teams form even faster.
"Now, one thing we do want to make sure of is that all your partners get the same amount of time to adjust to this, so no one is allowed to leave this room until everyone has come up and signed their name on the call sheet, stating that they're ready. In fact, in case you need verification about what the pairings are, they're all listed up here. And again, as it was with all previous pairings, they are merely our strong recommendations - if you feel a pairing doesn't work for you, all you need to do is come up to the podium and explain to me why, and I'll set about trying to find another pairing for you in the junior class, but I'm hoping I've done my job well enough that that won't be necessary."
It wasn't.
I was partnered up with Brianna Greene.
Yes, I've mentioned Brianna before, obviously, because she and I would often hang out and discuss Alpha problems, the kind of things that would've been impolite to complain about to our existing partners. It wasn't as though I had serious problems with Julia, Chelsea or Abi, but when I was struggling to make myself fit into the social identity Abi needed me to have to blend into her existing social stratosphere, I found myself struggling to reconcile the two identities within myself.
To be the sort of ladder-climbing chameleon Abi needed me to be, I had to be able to present a false front of whatever the situation called for. That meant, at any given moment, I might need to be anything from a high-class silver spoon egocentric one percenter to a scrappy, pulled-myself-up-by-my-boots, built-my-fortune-from-nothing self-financed ideocrat. Abi knew her world well and knew how to get me to fit within it, if I was anyone
but
who I really was. Oh, I never gave out any false names, but you ask anyone in Abi's social circles what I'm
really
like, and you'll get a completely different story for each person you ask. Sometimes even multiple stories from the same person.
Brianna had been forced to learn a similar skill when she picked up her social beta, Tom Kennedy. Yes, of
those
Kennedys. I know, I know, I've also been a little surprised that Brianna didn't take Tom's last name when they got married, but she was adamant she wanted to retain her own full name and not make that last compromise. The last year had been especially challenging for her, since she wanted to establish herself as a power player in the political arena on her own accord. She's often told me that using Tom to get her there felt like a shortcut in, but also a handicap once she got in there. She had to work three times as hard to get taken seriously by those in the political sphere, many of whom just wanted to consider her arm candy for Tom, whom she is at least a dozen times smarter than. She said with the Kennedy name, it would've been 'far too easy,' and one of the things I like most about Brianna is that she isn't one to shy away from a challenge.
Along with Brianna would come all three of her betas, Tom, who I just told you about, as well as Kelly and Casey, whom I mentioned earlier. Kelly and Julia were already close friends, each of them having Olympian level physiques, with Kelly making it to the Olympics for a variety of swimming activities. You've probably seen him and his nine gold medals on television at some point, where as Julia's had to relegate herself with her fourth-place finish at Wimbledon as her peak, although I keep telling her that her career has plenty of time left in it. I get that the average retirement age of tennis players is in their late 20s, but as I keep reminding her, we as a cohort are going to defy every convention and expectation set before us, so why not that one also?
I remember looking over at Brianna when Dr. Igarashi announced the Alpha pairings and seeing a huge grin on her face. "I'm down for this if you are," I told her, once the Doctor had allowed the group to break down into individual discussions.
"I've had a recurring dream about you and Kelly spit roasting me for years now, and you're telling me I get to make that happen anytime I want it?" Brianna giggled. "Yeah, I'm fucking down for that. In spades."
"Julia and Kelly'll probably want to fuck," I told her, as we kept talking through the permutations that we knew we needed to prepare for. "Shit, I imagine both Chelsea and Abi will want a crack at Kelly too." I couldn't help but laugh at the situation. "I mean, I'm not into guys, but he's probably in better shape than almost any guy on this campus."
"Oh, he's my lovely slab of Boston beefcake, although thank Christ he's slowly letting go of that goddamn accent," she giggled, shaking her head. "'BAHstun! I'm from BAHstun, sweetHAHrt!' Oh god, it was so fucking horrible when we first met!"
