Sally thought about what had happened, and about the note, on the bus home, and again later that night, and for the whole weekend, trying to understand what all it signified. She had sucked a boy's cock, before she knew his name, or even saw his face clearly. She had kissed him passionately and wrapped her tongue around his. She had kissed his girlfriend passionately. She had swallowed the boy's cum. Her sexual universe had been unexpectedly expanded. What did it mean? Did she do the right thing, or should she have refused them and moved to another seat? Was it a bit slutty to kiss strangers and suck an unknown cock in the dark? She didn't want to be a slut, but she didn't want to be so naΓ―ve about sex either.
The couple had seemed nice and ordinary when she saw them outside on the street. They looked interesting, especially the Matt guy. He looked like a university student, or someone who does an interesting job. She would have loved to go to University and study Literature or something, but it had all gone wrong after she moved. Maybe she should finish high school next year, she thought.
But the note preyed on her mind. Should she meet the couple again? They looked nice and she really needed friends she could talk with, about books, and films, and politics, and stuff. The people at the real estate office were so dull, only thinking about houses and money and families. Maybe Matt and Ash would introduce her to some other young people, to uni students, or interesting people. Probably she should call them and meet for coffee, somewhere near her office, or her home.
Then she thought about the cock, and the kissing, and the sexy noises in the cinema. Maybe they want to have sex with me, she thought. Maybe he just wants to fuck me, to have two girls together, sucking him and opening our legs for him. The thought gave her a strange shiver, but she couldn't get it out of her head. How did she feel about that, she wondered. Would she like this guy, who she'd just met, to be her first? It would also be so strange to have sex with a boy for the first time while another girl watched. The girl might judge her, and laugh at her when she did something wrong. Maybe the guy would have sex with her, and then the couple would laugh about her afterwards. It would be so embarrassing.
Mind you, Sally thought, the whole idea of sex and being naked with a boy and letting him touch you anywhere, and put his cock inside you, and having an orgasm, with all its noisy loss of control, in front of another person; all of these things were embarrassing. But there would have to be a first time, sometime. She would have to do it with someone, so that she would know how it felt and how she felt about it. She had imagined that she would meet a boy that she fancied, or maybe even loved, and that they would do it tenderly together, to ease herself into post-virginity. But maybe it would be better to do it with a stranger, who you would never have to see again, so that you could leave the embarrassment behind.
At night, she thought about the evening at the cinema, and the feel of the boy's hard cock sliding in and out of her mouth, and the kissing with tongues of the boy and then the girl. She became aroused and pushed off her knickers to touch her pussy, which had become slippery with her juice. She thought about being naked with the boy, and him touching her breasts, and pushing her down and putting his cock inside her. It had felt very big. Would it fit inside her? She would have preferred to start with a little one first, and then maybe work up to a bigger one.
When she was a bit younger, she had experimented by putting things inside her when she was alone, to see how big she was. She had started with a pen, and then a small carrot, and then a bigger one, before gently poking a long cucumber a few inches inside her pussy. They had all felt funny at first, but had gone in ok. Well, she found blood on the sheets after one of the carrots, and started to panic, thinking she had injured herself and would have to go to hospital and admit that she had been doing something shameful to herself. But when the bleeding stopped and she had calmed down, she realised that she must have broken her hymen. Afterwards, it was easier to put her fingers and other things inside her, and there was no more bleeding, which was good. But was the boy's cock bigger than the cucumber? It was certainly hotter and smoother.
She masturbated several times thinking of how it might be if she did it with the boy, coming the shuddering climaxes as she imagined the boy thrusting himself into her, and imagining his heavy weight pushing her to the bed. She didn't think about the girl at these times. Somehow the girl just magically disappeared when he took her clothes off and pushed her to the bed.
She returned to work on Monday, still undecided whether to get in touch with the boy again. It might be a great opportunity to make new friends; it might be a chance to lose her virginity and experience the wonder of sex in real life; or it might be a big mistake which she would be ashamed of forever. She was so indecisive, she scolded herself.
But after a few more days of agonising, and days of routine work with the same old people, and nights of dirty fantasies, and breathless orgasms, and strange fears, she at last decided to call the boy. She called after work on Wednesday. The phone took a long time to answer, before she heard a boy's voice.
'Hello, is that Matt?' Sally asked nervously.
'Yes, it is. Is that you Stephanie?' the boy answered.
Sally's heart fell. He must have a lot of girls calling him. He won't be interested in someone as dull as me.
'No, it's Sally. I sat next to you at the Cinema on Friday. You probably don't remember. You gave me your number, and...'
'Oh yes. Sally. You didn't tell us your name,' he answered. His voice sounded pleased to speak to her at least, although some people can fake it very well. 'How are you? It's great that you called me.'
'Oh, I'm fine,' Sally replied. She racked her brain for something interesting to say, but she had not done anything interesting since she had seen them. It had only been work and at home alone with her mother.
'I thought it might be nice to meet for coffee or something, to have a chat,' Sally said. 'I haven't been here for very long, and I don't know many people, and...' She trailed off, realising that she was sounding a bit of a pathetic whiner rather than an interesting person worthy of a coffee with this nice boy.
But Matt didn't seem to mind her lacklustre response. 'Great!' he said. 'Um, if you want... and if you're free, of course... would you like to come to my place for dinner on Friday? It won't be really special. I'll just knock something up, and invite Ash, if that's ok with you? I'm sure she'd like to meet in a place we can see each other, and talk too.'
Wow dinner, Sally thought. That was a big surprise. And at his house too. Amazing. Of course she was free, her social calendar was a wasteland, with tumbleweeds all she had to look forward to. What a generous boy.
'Well, yes!' she replied. 'That's so kind, so amazing. Are you sure it's not too much trouble?' She remembered all the fuss her mother went to whenever she invited her friends for a meal.
So Matt assured her that it was no trouble, and gave her his address and arranged to meet her at 7 on Friday. Sally put down the phone. She was stunned. She was excited. She was full of anticipation, and hope and fear jumbled all together inside her. A real dinner party of her own, without her mother watching over her!
Thursday and Friday sped past and, before she knew it, Sally was at Matt's door. He had an apartment near the University. When she heard his address, she was happy that he lived in such a cool neighbourhood. She had passed a number of cafes, bars and restaurants on the way here, and the streets were full of young excited people. It was so different to the quiet suburbia that her mother had chosen for them. Sally had agonised for two days about what to wear, but settled on a pretty yellow dress that she hadn't had a chance to wear before, due to her lack of a social life. It had tiny sleeves and hung loosely above her knees. The neckline was low enough to show a hint of cleavage, but not so low to look slutty. She wasn't really happy with her look, but time had run out, and here she was.
Matt opened the door with a big smile, and ushered her inside. He was wearing jeans and a half-open shirt with the sleeves rolled up. She noted the dark hair on his chest, and felt a funny little shiver, before turning to check out the room. It was a long studio, with a big desk covered with papers and drawings, a couple of bookcases crammed with books, an old sofa covered with an Indian throw rug over it, an old armchair, a wooden table and several chairs, some kitchen benches with a stove and fridge, and beyond that, a double bed at the far end. It was a studio apartment with everything in the one room. On the walls were some art prints (she was pleased to recognise a Chagall and some pre-Raphaelites), plus a historic map of Paris, and a few arty photos. It was cluttered, but cosy somehow. Sally promised herself she would check out the bookshelves later to find out more about Matt's taste.