"Why don't you come over for dinner tomorrow night?" my new friend Mark said.
"I'd love to," I said. "What can I bring?"
"We'll be having surf and turf," Mark said. "So bring some wine if you'd like."
"I'll do that," I said.
This would be the second time we got together. I guess you could call it our second date. The first date had been arranged by a friend of mine.
Well, maybe not exactly a friend. John was a guy I had been with three times. "Been with" describes it. I had met him on the internet, looking for someone to meet for sex. Specifically, I was a bottom and enjoyed sucking cock. John was in a committed but open relationship with another man, had a good-sized cock (a turn-on for me) and loved being sucked.
While I wasn't a great cocksucker, I was enthusiastic, and a quick learner, and he enjoyed giving me directions. By the third time we were together, I had him moaning quickly as I moved my lips up and down his big, hard shaft and before too long his cock was pulsating in my mouth and I was greedily drinking his cum and swallowing as much as I could. Some of his cum leaked out onto my chin as I knelt between his legs and I swiped it off with my finger and licked it off and swallowed that, too.
"You're getting pretty good at that," John said, as I got up and sat next to him on the couch. We were both naked and at this point, and we were pretty comfortable with each other. I enjoyed his company (and his big cock), but I knew he wasn't looking to get out of his relationship and I didn't want to interfere with it. We were together purely for the sex (well for me to suck his cock) and that was fine.
"Thanks!" I said. "You're a good teacher." We sat and talked for a while like any good friends might. Every once in a while I'd reach down and caress his cock just because, well, I love big cocks. I knew that once was enough for him but I still liked touching it.
"I've been thinking," I said
"Oh?" he said.
"Yeah," I said. I enjoy getting together with you. It's fun, you're a nice guy, and basically sane, which isn't that common. But I've been getting together with guys like this, mostly married or attached, for a long time. I mean it's really the only way I've ever gotten together with another man, casually, for sex like this. It's fun and up until now has been what I've wanted. I'm thinking now that I might want more."
"Really? He said. "Like what are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking that while I've been thinking I'm bi, because I have been with women, that I would like to maybe find more with another man. I'm thinking I'd like to look for a man to have a relationship with, a committed relationship, not just to fuck and suck."
"Wow," he said. "Big change. Are you sure?"
"Yeah," I answered. "I've been thinking about this for a while. Being with you has helped push me that way because you're someone I feel friendship with besides just being someone I want to have sex with. It gives me the idea that maybe there's someone out there that I can have both with. A more committed relationship, or maybe more than that, plus good sex."
"You're sure?" he asked. "That's a big decision. Your life would change quite a bit."
"Yeah," I said. "I know. But just coming to this decision over the past couple of weeks really started to feel right. I started to feel more...I don't know...honest with myself? Something has changed and I know I want to find someone to be with as more than a sex partner, maybe more than a friend."
"How can I help?" he said.
"Well," I said. "You have a lot of gay friends. I'm thinking you may know someone who knows someone who might be willing to let me explore this. I know it's kind of weird to be looking to just 'try it out.' But I really do mean it, I really would like to meet someone who I could be with. I'm not just bullshitting myself or you. As long as someone knew going in that this would be all a new thing for me..."
"Okay," John said. "I believe you. I can't promise anything but I'll ask around." At that, he kissed me (we both like to kiss), we got dressed and headed our different directions.
He did his best to help me out. He set me up with a couple of guys over the next couple of weeks. I met them for coffee or drinks. Nice guys, but just no chemistry.
A couple of weeks after the last meeting, I got a text from him. He said that coincidentally a friend of a friend had broken up with his boyfriend a few months ago, and wanted to start dating again. I told him about you and thought he'd enjoy meeting.
"He knows where you're at, and he's fine with that. According to my friend, Mark is one of the nicest guys he knows. He's also a pretty big guy which is good, I know you like big guys." I'm 6-2 and not skinny and a total bottom, and I like to be with guys as big or bigger than I. That's not always easy to find.