Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Thanks to Richard and Jerrie for the edits.
I burst through the front door, making a point to slam it behind me, before going to the kitchen to find a beer. I twisted off the cap of one, and screamed in pain.
"Mother fucker." That hadn't been a twist off. I throw the cap across the room cussing loudly and then looked at my freshly cut palm and cussed at it. I chugged the whole beer down, getting mostly foam in the process. I grabbed the bottle opener from the drawer before getting another bottle.
"What the hell?" I heard Mac yelling. He came into the kitchen, a baseball bat in hand, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. "Camble?"
"Yeah," I said, willing myself not to yell at him. I was in great need to go off on someone, even if I had spent the last hour over by the lake screaming and cussing at everyone's existence.
"What is the matter with you?" he asked. He hadn't let go of the bat, but he did let it drop to his side. "Where's Reed?"
"Where's Reed? I'll tell you where Reed is; he's at some bar making out with his fucking boyfriend, that's where Reed is." I growled, and drank the rest of my beer. I needed something harder then beer. I opened the cupboard over the frig, hoping Rhonda hadn't finished all the booze they kept at home.
"What are you talking about?" Mac asked, sitting at the table. I found an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels and brought it, and a shot glass, to the table. I took three shots, one right after the other, before Mac took the bottle away and gave me a stern look. "Cam, you have to talk to me here, okay? I don't understand a single thing coming out of your mouth."
"There we are, sitting in this bar that Reed loves right? We've been there for about a half hour, having some beers, talking, laughing, and just being us right?" Mac nodded and I take the opportunity to steal the bottle back. "So, everything up to that point had been great. His parents were wonderful, and the city really wasn't as bad as I'd always thought it would be, right?" I took another shot, and wiped the back of my hand across my lips.
"Okay," Mac said, urging me on.
"Okay. So this guy walks in. I see him when he walks in, and he's looking for someone. He's looking fucking hard. Then, I guess Reed noticed me looking at the guy and turns to see who it was, and guess what?" I asked laughing. "It's Seth." I started laughing uncontrollably. Because really, looking back, it was all so hilarious; in a not-funny-at-all kind of way.
"Who's Seth?" Mac asked, which made me laugh harder.
"I have no idea," I said, giggling, while I took two more shots. "Reed has never mentioned him, not a single fucking time. And it turns out he's known the guy for years. They were best friends, did you know that? I sure the fuck didn't. And Seth just kept going on and on about missing Reed; how he was so sad when he'd left. And Reed? Fucking Reed just swooned. Like a love sick puppy. Like a big bright eyed love sick puppy. He's never looked at me the way he was looking at Seth."
"Cam," Mac started, but I cut in because, now that I'm talking, I don't want to stop.
"So, I'm sitting there for another hour while they 'catch-up', trying to get Reed's attention. Because really, I feel extremely low and he doesn't even notice that I'm just sitting there outside the conversation. Or that I don't have a single idea what they are talking about. And I mean, I could understand a little at first, because he hadn't seen his friend so long, right? But after an hour? Come on; a man doesn't ever have that much ego, or self-confidence left.
"So finally I just get tired of sitting there. I tell Reed that I'm going to go back to his parent's house, so he and Seth could talk more, right? So I don't have to sit there feeling terrible for no reason. But then, Reed just looks up at me, giving me this look. I can't even explain it; it was like he was scared, or like he was trying to tell me something, but I couldn't really get it." I rubbed the back of my hand across my eyes, willing them to stop tearing up. I took another shot, staring at the empty bottle in front of me.
"Camble?" Mac asked. I looked up at him, realizing I'd been somewhat lost in my thoughts for a minute. I smiled at him and started to peal the label off of the Jack Daniels bottle.
"Stupid me; I sat back down, thinking, well, more like knowing right then that he didn't want me to leave." I pulled a cigarette out of my pack. Usually Rhonda hated it when Mac or I smoked in the kitchen, but I think, just this once, she'd have allowed it. "So Reed and I are sitting there, kind of just staring at each other; then Seth takes it upon himself to ruin everything."
"What did he do?" Mac asked; he was on the edge of his seat.
"He kissed him; just grabbed Reed's face and pulled him to his lips and laid into him good." I took a long drag off my cigarette and brushed the tears off my cheeks again. I didn't think it would have hurt this much; I never though that I would lose Reed so easily. That he would be taken from me right in front of my eyes. "And Reed kissed him back. It was like they'd completely forgotten that I was there." I should have stayed, should've beat the crap out of Seth. I just wasn't expecting it, not from Reed.
"He couldn't; he wouldn't do that. Reed loves you."
"I think I know what my boyfriend's tongue looks like, and trust me; it was inside Seth's mouth." I bit my bottom lip. 'My boyfriend'? It suddenly hurt to call him that.
"Camble," Mac said and took my hand in his. I look up at him, and the look on his face told me how sad he was for me. I wished that he would have tried to convince me more; tell me that there had to be some reason why it happened. But he didn't. He knew, as well as I did, that the whole situation sucked.
"I hate that I was just this side trip for him. I hate that it was just fun and games for him. I love him so much, and I thought he loved me too, but now? It feels like everything was a lie between us. This entire time I've been walking around on cloud nine, knowing in my head and in my heart that, without a doubt, Reed loved me just as much as I love him. But, really, he didn't, and it hurts so much to look back and think about all the times we shared." I was rambling. I knew it, but the alcohol had finally gotten to me. "Why am I always part of a one-sided love? Why do I always have to deal with shit like this? Haven't I already had enough? I mean, like my fair share?"
"Camble, I don't really know what to say. But Reed does love you. I think you are taking this too far, and thinking things we both know aren't true."
"I don't know." I dropped my head to the table and felt comfort in the rush of pain to my forehead. I'd been almost completely numb for the last three hours.
"Get some sleep okay? And call him in the morning. I'm sure there is a reason for all of this, and it would be better if you found out now, rather then later." Mac stood and left me there in the kitchen, alone, where I'd drunk the last of their alcohol.
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"You have got to be kidding me," Wes said, pacing in front of me. I was sitting at the end of my bed in my parent's house, watching his feet, Camble's shirt in my hands. "Do you even realize what you've done?"
"Yes," I mumbled and closed my eyes.
"You have no idea what you've done, you stupid little boy." Wes continued on like I hadn't said a thing. "Camble is probably a wreck, and still you just sit here, staring at the floor. You don't deserve him."
"I know."