When I Am Gone

As When I am Gone is concluding, I want to thank everyone who has read this and enjoyed following the lives of Scott and Aaron. Even though this story is made up, it doesn't mean that this could not happen to someone else and that everyone is special for being themselves. I hope you enjoy the final part and please leave a comment on how you wanted the book to end.

Chapter 29

I woke up days later, but I felt very different. As I saw Aaron in the chair sleeping and no one else in sight, I started to freak out. I was tossing and turning, when the machines started to beep and make a lot of noise.

Aaron woke up and saw that I was worrying. He got up and laid me back down. He said shhh, it's alright you're in the hospital. As I continued to look confused at Aaron, he said that I just collapsed at Ashton's.

He asked do I remember what happen, but all I could remember was me hitting the floor. He said I'm sure it'll be alright and that I must have just been tired. I asked Aaron how long has he been here and he said he has never left my side.

With all the medication I was on, I began to get tired and just like that, I was out. I remember hearing Aaron calling my parents and telling them that I was just awake, but I went back to sleep. It must have been hours because it was night time.

I woke up to the sound of mom crying. I also heard Aaron getting angry and throwing something. My mom walked in and wiped her tears, she kissed me on the head and said I love you. I woke up and said hey mom.

She smiled and said hey sweetie, go back to bed it's late. I said where's Aaron and she said oh I sent him home so he could get some actual sleep. I knew that wasn't the reason and I asked her what's wrong as I saw the tears go down her face. She said nothing and I shouldn't worry about it, but I should go back to sleep.

The next day, I woke up to doctors in my room, they introduced themselves. I asked what was wrong with me and they said, you should ask your parents. I almost lost it, everyone in the room knew what was wrong with me, except me. So I lost my cool and I screamed, would someone just fucken tell me what is wrong.

As everyone stared at me, mom was the only one to speak. She said I had a tumor, in my brain. I sat there and began to cry, but as soon as Aaron heard that, he left the room. As mom tried to comfort me, I asked them, what is the treatment?

They looked at me and said, I'm very sorry to tell you this, but at the position of the tumor, it is too dangerous to remove it. Your percentile of surviving the operation is five percent. I looked at him and asked what caused this and he said it is probably because of the swelling of the brain.

He asked if I have ever hit my head and I told him yeah a bunch of times. He said that multiple injuries to the brain when it hasn't healed from the last injury can result in tumor or seizures.

As the doctor kept talking about the tumor, all I could think about was my life and how I haven't accomplished some of my goals. I asked the doctor how long do I have?

He told me that I have less than a year or maybe 5 months, it all depends on how the tumor spreads and affects your brain. When the doctors left, I tried calling Aaron, but he didn't answer. Mom said that I have to give him time to process this. I told her that, I need someone to hold my hand and be with me.

Mom said I'll be with you and I said thanks, but I want Aaron. Just like that, I was asleep again, this damn medicine couldn't let me be awake for more than an hour. After about a week, the doctors said that I could go home and that I should come back weekly for my medicine.

When I got home, my legs were so weak, I could barely walk to the front door without help. Mom told me that she was going to move me back down to the guest bedroom I was staying in before. All I could think about was not being next door to Aaron.

I wasn't going to share a bathroom with him anymore and I wasn't going to be close to him. When I got home it was the middle of the day and Aaron was just sitting on the couch staring off into nothing.

The door closed and Aaron wiped his tears and came over to me and helped me to my room. He got me into my bed and told me that if I needed anything, I would to just text him. As soon as he let go of me, he saw something on my arm.

He asked me if I could lift my shirt and when I did he could see the marks he just made on my skin. He started to tear up and said I'm sorry and left me alone, I said no Aaron come back, it's alright, but I was alone.

Chapter 30

I began to see how different I looked, the medicine that allowed me to use some of my leg muscles took all of my hair. For weeks Aaron wouldn't come around me. One day I fell out of bed and I called for help, no one came for hours. Finally, I heard Aaron come through the door.

I yelled for him and he came running into my room. He helped me back onto my bed and tucked me back in. He was just about to leave when I asked him to stay and lay next to me. He said ok and we cuddled the rest of the afternoon.

It was Christmas and the first time I was spending the holiday with Aaron. Mom got me a hat with my name on it and Aaron gave me the photo of him and I at the lake house. It was the first time we were ever there and I can't believe how far we have come.

One night, I began to have these night terrors of Aaron and I splitting apart. However, I was so loud he could hear me from his room. He came down and woke me up, we stayed up talking about school and how everyone missed me.

After Christmas, I had another accident and I fell out of bed. This time I broke a few bones and I was sent to the hospital. Mom was so happy to see me, she also said I was so lucky that it was only a broken arm this time.

I returned home and began to feel sick, I started to puke every morning. One day when mom wasn't here, it was just Aaron and I in the house. I called for Aaron and he came as fast as he could. I asked if we could cuddle because I needed to warm up.

When I went back to the hospital, the doctors decided they needed to keep me overnight for observations. As Aaron spent the whole day with me, we played games, talked and slept. However, when Aaron came in the next day with a black eye, I was concerned.

I asked what happened, but he wouldn't tell me. Then he said when he was walking around town he saw his step dad. His step dad saw him and asked how that fagot was doing? I completely lost it and started throwing punches at him and he threw a few back.

I yelled back at him and then I realized something, that I should've known all along, I'm gay. Aaron said he was sorry for shoving me away before because he didn't know if he was gay or not. Now it is so clear, that I am.

I love you, Scott Hall, I'm just an idiot for realizing now. As I began to cry, he came close to me and said, don't worry baby, I'll always be here for you. As our eyes met, he leaned in and kissed me. After waiting 4 years, he finally did it.

I was so happy, I kissed him back and we started to make out. I said ok not here, relax I'll be home in a couple of days. When the weekend was over, Aaron brought me home and said that your parents are a gonna be home late tonight.

As he tucked me back into bed, I asked if he could stay a little while longer with me. He laid with me and we kept our silence, until I asked him to do one thing, have sex with me. He turned and looked at me and said, I'm sorry Scott, but I'm afraid I'll hurt you.

I said it's alright if I'm gonna die, I don't want to die without having sex with you. He first said no, but as I kissed his neck and then took off his shirt, he couldn't resist. I kept kissing him and working my way down to his abs. He took off my shirt and started to do the same and I started to unbuckle his pants. I pulled down his pants and underwear and started to kiss him some more.

I got on top of him and started to work my way down to his dick. When I sucked it, it felt so good and tasted great. Then when he made me stand up on my knees. He pushed me onto my back and pulled my pants down. He began to suck me off and I said I was ready for him.

He flipped me over and before he stuck it in he said are you sure? I said go ahead, and when he did it, it hurt really bad at first, but then it was nice. He began thrusting and it started to hurt more and more.

He said do you need me to stop, but I held in the pain and said no, keep going. He kept thrusting and thrusting, over and over, then finally he began to moan and it was all over for him.

He turned me over and I was too tired to do any work, so he said it is alright I'll help you. He began to suck my dick and stroke it, within minutes, I said here it comes and he stopped moving, opened his mouth and then I moaned and groaned.

He said I tasted good and that maybe, we could try this again. As we continued to make out, he had to go get dinner for us. All I wanted was more of him, but he wanted pizza. We ate and watched a movie in my bed, it was so sweet that he held my hand the whole time.

Chapter 31

We woke up the next morning and I couldn't sit on my butt. I looked in my mirror and there bruises all over my ass. Aaron came back and saw my ass, I turned and saw he was standing there and I pulled up my underwear.

He said I'm sorry that I hurt you, then walked out of my room. He didn't come back the rest of the day. Mom came home and asked how I was feeling, I wasn't feeling great, but I said fine. When I went back to get my medicine, the doctors asked if I could walk.

I tried getting out of my wheelchair, but I couldn't. Then all of a sudden, I started to have a seizure in the middle of the hospital. The doctors found out the tumor has spread to almost 50 percent of my brain. So they determined I have only a few months leftt.

They decided to keep me in the hospital so it'll be easier to get me the medication. When I called Aaron, he picked up in the middle of class. I told him that I am gonna stay in the hospital for awhile and asked if he could bring my stuff. He left class and went home to pick up my belongings.

When he got to the hospital, mom pulled him into the hallway to tell him what the doctors told us. He came in and gave me a great big hug, he promised he wasn't gonna leave my side, he grabbed my hand and held on tight.

It was March and I told Aaron to try out for baseball. He thought that is what going to be a waste of time, time he couldn't waste, the last precious time I was gonna have with him. But I let him go and told him, he must, for his future.

Every time he came home from a game, he told me how it was hard for him to stop thinking about me. I wiped his tears, and told him it is alright I am here now, I'll always be here for you. He says I know, every time I win a game, I'll remember, you will always be my guardian angel.

As he crawled up into my hospital bed, he held me like he's never held me before. The next couple of weeks, I was still in the hospital, not much better. As I felt my finals days countdown, I knew that I had to make them count.

As the doctors grabbed my mom, dad and Aaron I knew it wasn't good. They began to tell them that my tumor has grew to 90 percent of my brain and that I won't make it 2 more days. As Aaron began to scream and cry, he came running into my room and I told him the championship game is tomorrow and should be getting ready.

It is gonna be alright, I promise I'll be here when you come back with the trophy. As he began to say he's not going I told him, I know you're angry, and if you have to, get angry, break things, yell at things. But I want you to promise me, promise me that you won't hate yourself because this is not your fault. Promise that you'll go to that game, play the best that you can a win that trophy for us.

The day of the championship, I told Aaron that I would be watching. But as I felt weak, I knew that my time was running out. So because I love him, I didn't tell him, I didn't tell him that I was gonna die today because I knew it would mess with him during his game. As my last request, I needed to make a podcast. So I named this one Smile.

Hey, I'm back, but not for long. I know that I haven't been doing these for awhile, so whoever is watching I want you to know that this is it. As tears ran down my face, I said I am not afraid anymore.

I have looked death in the face once and I am ready when she is, however, I want to stay to see Aaron win. Whoever is listening, go to the game tonight and you will see my boy win because he is a champion. I will be taping all the way till the end with you, so you won't miss me.

I turned on my tv and they had the championship game on. Aaron pitched first, he struck all the players out. As I watched on tv, I could see all the fans had their phone out watching me. I said to all you guys at the baseball game watching Aaron and I, thank you.

Aaron managed to stop the other team from scoring more points and the Jaguars were winning. As I grew weaker and tired, I began to thank everyone who was with me throughout my life. You all have helped change Jefferson high and I know there have been many rumors about me and most of them aren't true.

I am sorry I will not get to graduate with you guys, but I hope you have a great life in your futures. Remember that there is light at the end of every tunnel, it just depends on how long it takes for you to get to the light. As I was distracted with the podcast, I see Aaron look over at the fans and see what they were watching.

As he heard me speak, he knew it was my time. He said, I'm sorry coach, but my boyfriend needs me now. He dropped his glove, got in his car and drove as fast as he could to the hospital.

It took him five minutes and he was out of breath when he got to my room. As he saw me on my bed with my eyes closed. He pulled up a chair and said hey, I'm here. I opened my eyes and saw his beautiful smile. He grabbed my hand and said he was never letting go. I said the camera is rolling, you know. He said good because I have a statement to make.

My name is Aaron Baxter, the love of my life is laying here. You know him for changing Jefferson high, changing the life of students, and being a badass when he kicked Mikey's ass. I am in love with Scott and I always will be. He wiped my tears as I held his hand and said, you are gonna grow up, you are gonna meet a nice guy, you will look back to the time we spent together and smile.

Thank you for coming up to me freshmen year and being my best friend, I never had before. No Scott, I've never told you this but I only came up to you because I thought you were hot and I wanted to get to know you. As tears down my face I was speechless.

Then I looked at the camera and said when I am gone, don't be sad. Cherish the time, the memories you share with me because, without you, I wouldn't be me. As I looked in the corner of the room, I saw her. She looked and walked towards me. No one else could see her, but me. She asked me if I was ready. I told her no, but I'll go anyway.

As I squeezed Aaron's hand tight and said I love and I will always be with you. You may not see me, but I'll be there listening. As I squeezed his hand as tight as I could, she placed her hand over mine and Aaron's. I told Aaron to kiss me and when I felt his lips one last time, I was ready.

When he backed away from my lips, he felt my grip loosen and my last heartbeat beat. As I drifted away from my body, I could see mom, dad, and Aaron all crying, with tears down their faces. I realized that now I am gone, someone will miss me.