Wee of the Big Three-Oh

*Author's Note: Any and all persons engaging in any sexual activity are at least Eighteen years of age.

*Disclaimers: This story has been edited by myself, utilizing Microsoft Spell-check. You have been forewarned; expect to find mistakes.

*.*

Robin Van Dorscht knew this day would come. He'd been with Superior Motors for nine weeks and thus far had made only one sale. So, when Andy Delacroix quietly asked Robin to come to his office, Robin gave a wan smile to Brian and Glen, his fellow salespeople and walked down the carpeted hallway.

A few moments later, Robin quietly wished Briand and Glen well, shook their hands, and left Superior Motors. Andy joined the two salesmen and they watched Robin climb into his Nissan.

"Numbers, gentlemen," Andy said firmly. "It's all about your numbers."

"Yepper," Brian agreed.

"Yepper? YEPPER? Does anyone even say that anymore?" Glen taunted Brian.

"Hey, uh, bitch? Three. That's right. Three sales this week. Oh. And uh, one pre-owned. That's right, the Mercedes Andy was about to trade off. So, uh, yepper, you can kiss my ass," Brian smirked as they watched Robin drive away.

Arriving home at his Eastlawn Condominium, Robin saw Nicole's car and frowned. She was supposed to be at work so it just made no sense that her car would be in front of the condominium at this time of the day.

"Robin! I uh, what are you doing, why are you home?" Nicole stammered when Robin entered.

"Sales were bad, so got let go," Robin said, unknotting his tie. "But, uh, what you doing home?"

"I uh, I'm," Nicole started, then seemed to puff up.

Robin watched as the thirty four year old woman set her jaw firmly and even got a smirk on her face. He calmly waited, idly wondering if there was any beer in the refrigerator.

"Well, the truth is? I've found a real man," Nicole said, triumphantly.

"Oh? How nice for you," Robin shrugged.

Then he surprised Nicole by grabbing her purse. Before she could react, he pulled her keys out of the purse and took his house key, and the key to the Chevy Malibu. He also removed her mailbox key.

"You can't, that, that's my car," Nicole screamed.

"Oh, no ma'am, it is not your car," Robin said. "My name on the title, my name on the insurance, my car. This uh, real man of yours? Get him give you a car."

"But all my stuff's in the car," Nicole shrilled. "And Gloria's and Debbie's."

"Call your real man, tell him he needs get his real ass down here and I'll let you unload my real car," Robin snapped. "Oh, and tell your real man, he comes anywhere near me? I'll assume he intends to do me some real harm and I will really hurt him."

"As if you could," Nicole sneered.

Nicole must not have warned Bruce Greg, because the first thing Bruce tried to do was grab Robin. Robin's foot swept out and put Bruce onto the ground, hard. He then stepped on Bruce's throat.

"I've had a real shitty day, 'real man,'" Robin snarled. "So, nothing would make me happier than putting your real ass in a real hospital. Now, both of y'all just need get her shit, and her two bitch ass daughters' shit and go. Got it?"

Smirking from the doorway of his condo, Robin supervised the hurried emptying of the automobile. Then, when Nicole tried to push past him, Robin shoved her back, hard.

"No ma'am. You no longer live here. There's any of your shit? Or the two cunts? I'll box it up and call you and tell you where and when you can pick up the shit," Robin said firmly.

With that, Robin hit the key fob locking the Chevy. Then he slammed the door of his condo shut over Nicole's protests.

Entering his bedroom, Robin surveyed the chaos. He straightened up, sighing heavily.

The room that Gloria and Debbie had shared was also in a state of disarray. Robin saw the two teddy bears he'd bought when Nicole had broached the subject of bringing her fourteen and twelve year old daughters and moving in with him. Gloria had sneered, and after a moment, Debbie had sneered at the teddy bears as well.

Robin did box up what was left of the girls' clothing. The last thing he did was toss the two teddy bears into the boxes, along with the two pillows from their beds. Then he boxed up the last of Nicole's things.

"Parking lot of Burns & Burns on Straightway Highway, thirty minutes," Robin snapped. "You're not there, I'll assume you no longer want your stuff and I'll bring it down to Goodwill."

"Why are you being such an ass hole?" Nicole snarled.

"Sorry, but that was rule number one in the handbook on dealing with treacherous back stabbing cunts," Robin said. "Thirty minutes, starts now."

Bruce Greg decided to try a lead pipe this time. Nicole's scream told Robin that she had no idea the buffoon was going to try this.

"Might want drop it," Robin smiled, his .44 magnum in his hand before Bruce cleared the rear of his battered pickup truck.

"Bruce, get back in the truck," Nicole ordered.

Muttering angrily, Bruce did so. Robin put the boxes into the rear of the truck, then drove away.

*.*

That week, and the next week, Robin sent out resumes. He went on a few job interviews. The third week of his unemployment, Robin found it harder and harder to get out of bed. Once he did rouse himself, Robin would turn on his computer, then sit and stare at the screen before finally clicking onto the Internet.

He went through the job listings. He went through the employment sites. Then he would sit, sipping his coffee, staring at, but not seeing the screen.

Twenty four days after Andy Delacroix called Robin into his office, Robin got a call from Oakleaf Public Utilities. He was hired on, mainly because of his bachelor's in Business Administration from Connelly College. Robin hacked off his growth of stubble, ironed his shirts, brought his suits down to the dry cleaners and had them cleaned and pressed.

"Must have got a job," the old man at the dry cleaner's commented.

"I uh, yeah, yes I did," Robin agreed, surprised.

"Bunch of suits, and you're smiling," the man explained, filling out the ticket on his computer screen. "Usually, guy brings in whole bunch of suits? He's smiling, it's because he's got a new job. He's got that hang dog look? Just got fired and is looking. Nothing? It's just another day for that guy. You're smiling."

"Yes I am," Robin smiled, taking his claim stubs.

"Good luck buddy," the man said.

Robin went back to his condo and logged onto his computer again. During his depression, Robin had fallen prey to an addiction; on-line pornography.

At first, it had been the straight suck and fuck pornography, man on woman. Then, after tiring of that, Robin had looked at some man and man on woman, man and man and man on woman. After growing weary of that as well, Robin perused anal. Lesbian. Extreme lesbian, fisting, inserting large objects into vaginas and rectums, et cetera.

Then Robin clicked on Gay pornography. He watched as men pleasured other men. He watched as men used other men for their own pleasure.

Once, when in high school, Robin had been touched by the boyfriend of another classmate. Robin had been drunk and the other guy had fondled Robin's fat cock and balls. Then a third drunk had staggered into the bathroom and Robin and the other guy had left the bathroom. The guy and his girlfriend left shortly afterward; Robin never saw that guy again.

Right when the third guy had walked into the bathroom, Robin had been reaching his own hand out for his new friend's cock. Robin always wondered, just what would have happened if they'd locked the bathroom door. Would they have jerked each other off? Would his new friend have sucked Robin's cock? Would his new friend have forced Robin onto his knees and fucked Robin's protesting hole?

Robin fit in well in his new job. His supervisor at Oakleaf's Public Utilities appreciated Robin's dedication; at twenty nine, Robin was not a child. Robin had a home to pay for, bills to pay, and the knowledge that, job or no job, those bills would continue to come in. Those bills would need to be paid.

"Mom and dad died when I was sixteen," Robin said when he and his supervisor went over his 90 day evaluation. "Kind of made me realize, no one's going wipe my... Nose for me."

The older woman smiled, thrusting her sagging chest toward Robin. Robin smirked as he signed the evaluation.

At the end of August, Robin realized he was about to turn the big three oh. And he had a three day weekend, Labor Day to celebrate.

"Jesus, what? Been four, no, no, been five months since you been laid," Robin said when he crawled into his car at the end of his work day.

He was now driving the Chevy Malibu; it was newer than his old Nissan. It was a nicer car, and was more fuel efficient as well.

"Turning thirty. You've never done it, you know you want to do it," Robin argued with himself. "Got a whole three day weekend."

Logging onto his computer at home, Robin found a Personals web site that said it was free. He looked at listings for men looking for men and found a few within fifty miles of Oakleaf. Even more surprising was that three of them were in the Oakleaf area, two of them were students at Connelly.

But clicking onto the 'Respond' link directed Robin to sign up for a six month membership. Robin nodded stoically. He almost did sign up; he could easily afford the $49.95 member ship fee.

"Connelly, Connelly," Robin muttered. "They've got an on-line newspaper, don't they?"

Sure enough, the local college did have an on-line newspaper. And that newspaper had a classified section, which in turn did have a 'Personals' section.

Robin was about to respond to the profile of a very handsome Connelly Cougar football player's advertisement. Charlie claimed to be curious; Robin reasoned that he too was curious. But something kept Robin from clicking on Charlie's profile.

"Uh huh, and y'all run into each other at Rustler barbeque," Robin muttered. "You sure Charlie's going keep his mouth shut?"

Robin got himself a beer. Cracking the top and taking a hefty gulp, Robin slowly walked back to his computer.

"What was that shit ass school..." Robin asked himself aloud. Drake, driver, shit, come on Robin, you're turning thirty. Too young already be losing your memory."

He sat down and typed out 'Louisiana' into the search box. Just after he hit 'Send' he sat up.

"DeGarde!" Robin cried out loud.

The University of Louisiana at DeGarde did have an on-line newspaper. And just like Connelly, that on-line newspaper did have a classified section, with a Personals section.

Harold Melancon had a military style haircut and a tanned body. The handsome young man's photograph showed Harold posing, shirtless and in a pair of quite short gym shorts, that looked to be full. Harold claimed to be just looking for a casual hook-up, some no strings attached fun, man to man.

Robin's mouth was dry as he clicked on the twenty year old man's profile. Robin was then directed to create a membership profile and Robin did so.

Searching through his cell phone photos, Robin found a photograph Nicole had clicked of him as he was modeling some novelty boxers she'd bought for him. The boxers were white satin with bright red lipstick prints all over.

He had needed a haircut at the time, so his blond hair looked messy in the photograph, but it was the sexiest one Robin could find, so he attached it to his profile.

Then he carefully wrote out his reply to Harold Melancon. Robin explained that he'd be in DeGarde, Louisiana only a day, possibly two and was looking for some Man On Man action.

"I'm turning 30 and I've always been curious. Well, I told myself, no time like now to find out, right?" Robin typed.

He read and re-read his response, then, after a deep gulp of beer, Robin hit 'Send' and let out his breath.

There were a few other profiles that intrigued him. Robin thought he'd give Harold Melancon 12 hours to respond, then he'd try another, maybe Josh Lacombe, who had a cute picture with his profile. Josh looked just a little on the chubby side, but had a cute smile. And, in his photograph, he was brazenly reaching into his jeans, reaching for a fat package.

Robin logged out of the U.L.D. web site and went to one of his favorite pornographic sites. He pursed his lips in impatience; there were no new posts. So he found a favorite post, one that showed three football players. The three well-muscled young men did 'rock, paper, scissors' and one apparently 'lost.' The 'loser' got down on his hands and knees and opened his mouth. One football player knelt down and presented his thick cock for the loser's mouth. The other football player gripped the loser's buttocks in his hand and spread the young man's buttocks wide.

Within moments, the one fucking the loser's mouth pulled out and sprayed his semen onto the loser's face and open mouth and outstretched tongue. The other football player pulled out of the losers buttocks and sprayed a large load of semen onto the loser's buttocks and back.

Again, the three men did 'rock, paper, scissors' and again, the same young man lost. This time, he lay on his back. The one that had fucked the loser's mouth now knelt between the young man's spread legs, while the other young man presented his hard cock for the loser's wide open mouth.

As he watched, Robin noticed that all three of the young men had no hair on their legs, on their scrotums, on their buttocks. He also noticed that all three young men had their dark brown pubic hair trimmed to just a neat little patch above their hard cocks.

Robin closed that clip and went to another clip. This clip showed two young men in a side by side 'sixty nine' position. While they used their mouths on one another's cocks, they fingered each other's asses. This clip also showed him that the two young men had very neatly manicured patches of pubic hair, hairless scrotums, hairless buttocks.

Robin shut down his computer and decided he'd had one too many beers to drive, so walked to the small drugstore three blocks away from his condominium. The drugstore was open 24 hours a day; once when Debbie had the flu, Robin had made the trek at three o'clock in the morning to get the child some medication.

Robin briefly wondered how Gloria and Debbie were doing. Neither girl had shown him any respect, any consideration while living under his roof, eating his food, sleeping in beds he had paid for. But Robin still wondered how they were faring.

Isabella, a friend of Nicole's had seen Robin a few months ago in Burns & Burns grocery store and had let Robin know that Nicole's 'real man' had turned out to be abusive. He had broken Nicole's nose and knocked out two of her teeth. Furthermore, according to Isabella, Gloria was accusing that Bruce had touched her.

"Isabella? Listen, Nicole made her choice," Robin had said politely but firmly, then walked away.

But, truthfully, Robin had felt no joy in hearing about Nicole's misfortune. He also felt sorry for Debbie and Gloria. Those two girls had no idea who their father was; Nicole claimed she didn't know. They were the real victims, being dragged around by their mother from house to trailer to apartment to house, from man to man to man.

In the small drugstore, Robin looked at depilatory creams. He also looked at razors and shave gels. Then he saw a box of and read the instructions on how to safely wax his unwanted hair.

"Enough for legs and underarms..." Robin read to himself.

"Yeah, if you're a woman," Robin reasoned with himself. "But if you're a one hundred and seventy two pound, five foot ten inch tall man..."

He bought two boxes, as well as an enema bag. If the gray haired woman behind the counter thought anything about Robin's purchases, she did not offer her opinion. She simply wished Robin a good day.

Home again, Robin poured himself a whiskey, neat. Then he prepared the first of the waxes. Finishing his whiskey, Robin gripped onto the edge of the tape.

"Mother! Fucker!" Robin screamed.

One kit did prove to be enough for legs, scrotum and butt crack. Robin applied the lotion provided with the kit, and sipped his second whiskey.

Waking up, or coming to, Robin saw that he'd fallen asleep on his couch. He logged onto his computer and saw that he had an email.

"Saturday works for me," Harold Melancon had responded.

Robin logged on, reserved a room at the DeGarde Inn and alerted Harold that he would be arriving in DeGarde, staying at the DeGarde Inn on Saturday. Harold must have been waiting for Robin's reply; his response was less than a moment later.

"Text me your room number when you get it," Harold typed, along with his phone number.

Robin used the last of the lotion to slowly stroke himself as he thought about meeting the handsome Harold Melancon, finally satisfying that niggling curiosity.

Again, Robin logged onto the U.L.D. on-line newspaper. There were no new posts, and Robin sat, wondering about any other curiosities he had.

"Never been with an Asian chick," Robin said.

But there were no Asian women in the Personals. Robin then found Josh Lacombe's profile and jotted out a quick note, telling the cute young man he'd be in town Sunday. He then logged back onto the DeGarde Inn's web site and extended his reservation for Sunday as well.

His alarm jolted him awake and Robin warily got ready for the day ahead. Thankfully, everyone at Oakleaf's Public Utilities was anxious to get a head-start on their three day weekend and Robin could nurse his hangover in relative calm.

Arriving home, Robin limited himself to two beers, and only after eating a light dinner. He packed a small duffel bag, making sure to have his enema bag and a tube of lubricant. He jerked off again, fantasizing about what he and Harold would be doing on the motel's bed in less than twenty four hours.

Logging onto his computer again, Robin saw that he had a response from Josh Lacombe. Josh had responded with a happy note, saying he looked forward to meeting Robin. His email had an attachment and Robin clicked on the link.

The first photograph showed a nude Josh, hard cock in hand. Robin's eyes opened wide; Josh's cock was rather large and fat. The second of the three photographs showed Josh bent double, performing auto-fellatio. The third photograph showed Josh from behind, hands spreading his buttocks, displaying his cute, hairless rectum.

Robin replied with a simple note that he looked forward to meeting with Josh. Then, on a whim, he snapped off a selfie of his nude body, hard cock in hand.

"Yum!" was Josh's response.

Saturday morning, Robin was awake an hour before his alarm clock. He showered, took extra care with his shaving, then debated with himself on what to wear.

"It's not a date, dude," Robin finally said. "I mean, y'all going meet at the hotel and then..."

Robin couldn't say it out loud. He could not say that he was meeting with another man, for sex. Resolutely, he selected an attractive pull over shirt, cardinal red with alternating horizontal pin stripes of blue and green. He pulled on a pair of cotton boxers, then a pair of cargo shorts. He jammed his feet into a pair of topsiders and he was ready.

Robin carefully shut everything off, made sure his alarm was armed, and left. Even though he had a six hour drive ahead of him, and would not be able to physically take ownership of his hotel room until four pm, Robin's heart was pounding.

Managing to survive Houston's traffic, Robin's heart slowed to a normal rate. He stopped at a Wendy's, ate lunch, then used the restroom. Then he drove east again.

It was just after two in the afternoon when Robin reached the DeGarde Inn. With a friendly smile, the clerk checked and said Robin's room was ready. She handed Robin the key card for Room 209 and wished Robin a good stay.

"Room 209," Robin texted to Harold.

"Kewl," was Harold's response.