This Can’t Be Happening

My continuing account of my first experience with exhibitionism and male to male sex. This is a longer chapter with a fair amount of background contained, but I think it's important to my story. All names and locations are changed to maintain anonymity. Thank you to all who have voted, commented and followed. I'm not sure whether people expect me to respond to their comments or not? And thank you to all who have chosen to read my account. It's very encouraging for a newbie like myself.

As Phillip tucked his cock and balls back into his trousers he told me to get washed up and he'd drop me home. I walked to the bathroom, acutely aware of my new shaven self. My cock was still hard. I washed my face and took the opportunity to feel my smoothness. It felt so good and seemed to emphasise my sensitivity. It also wasn't lost on me that it marked something in my relationship with Phillip.

I had a lot of thinking to do.

As I finished stroking myself and drying my face, I saw Phillip standing in the doorway with my clothes. "How does it feel?" he asked. I couldn't lie and told him it felt good. "It doesn't only feel good David," he told me "It looks fantastic on you. You have the perfect body for it." I blushed as he stared at my erection. I was still trying to understand why my cock wouldn't relax.

"Let's get you home," he said. He handed me my clothes and watched me dress.

As we drove he told me how lucky he felt to have found someone like me. Explaining that, for an older man, a true exhibitionist and masochist was hard to find. "When you came for the interview all I could think about was how good it would feel to spank your cute arse and stick my cock in your mouth," he said. "I never imagined it would happen." Again, I found myself turned on by his choice of words. So different from his normal self. I loved the fact that I turned him on. So much had happened in such a short time but I knew I didn't want it to stop. Not yet anyway. I wanted to explore this new side of me.

"You know," he said, "you really are a natural cocksucker David. I'm not sure I can think of anyone who's sucked me off that's taken to it the way you have."

I didn't know what to say really. I was actually flattered, but told him I just did what I thought was right. It helped that I found his cock so beautiful to look at and told him so. He just smiled, then went on to say that what we had was purely sexual. "You understand that don't you?" he asked. I nodded my head. "I'm old enough to know it won't last and that we can't have proper relationship. We're just two guys having fun." I accepted that but told him I wanted to have as much fun with him as we could.

As he pulled up outside my home, he reminded me to keep myself shaved and then told me that from now on, when I arrived for work I wasn't to wear underwear. That made me very excited, but I hid it quite well, just saying that I understood.

As I got into bed I knew it would feel like a long time until Thursday. My mind began to race with everything that had happened and the things Phillip had said. I was excited at the prospect of not wearing underwear to work. It turned me on that only Phillip and me would know. It would be our secret. Why did he tell me that? Did he have plans already? I had so many questions.

I masturbated before I began to drift off to sleep, but as I did I remembered I had swimming club tomorrow, well that day actually, as it was nearly 2am.

I woke quite late on Sunday but went about the day as usual. I arrived at swimming club at the normal time. I was a decent swimmer and when I was asked to swim for the club while still at school, I jumped at the chance. Now, 5 years on, I was one of four other guys in my age group. Lewis, my best friend, was one of them.

The pool had a communal changing room and until then I'd never had any issues with being naked in front of the others. I wasn't ashamed of my body despite not having a particularly large cock. We are what we are, I always told myself.

But today everything was different. Now, I was shaven. Now, I realised I enjoyed being naked in front of another man. Now, when I saw my swimming buddies naked, I saw their cocks differently. Now, I saw the beauty of a cock and had experienced sucking and swallowing cum.

Everything had changed.

Somehow, I managed to get changed without anyone noticing. I did get a slight semi erection, but managed to sort myself out before getting into the pool. Training went as usual and my mind was distracted from anything "untoward"

When we finished I made an excuse for not showering with the others in the communal shower, telling the coach I had to get home for a family event. I was drying myself at my locker, trying to be as quick as I could before anyone saw me, when the coach arrived at my side. He was naked, carrying a towel. I'd seen him nude many times. It wasn't unusual. But the events with Phillip had changed everything.

He was in his late 30s and tall, around 6'5" with body honed from years of competition swimming. He'd even been in the UK swimming squad earlier in his career. He had blond short hair and always seemed to have a tan. I would say he was a good looking guy. He did have a large cock. Even soft it was around 7 inches at a guess, quite thick too, but until then I hadn't thought much about it. I saw it differently now.

He sat down on bench in front of the lockers with his legs open, his cock just hanging there and asked me if everything was alright. "You seem distracted today Dave," he said. I was terrified of taking my trunks off and tried to assure him that I was ok. I couldn't stop myself taking a short look at his cock. He started to chat with me about training and mundane stuff, but all I could think about was how would I hide myself from him. I just stood there trying to chat without making him curious as to why I wasn't getting undressed. Fortunately, he seemed satisfied that I was ok and got up to head for the shower. This was the moment I chose to get undressed. So I dropped my trunks and stood up to get my clothes.

Just as I reached for my jeans coach reappeared next to me to remind me about a competition next week. I didn't have time to cover myself. He noticed immediately and as soon as he looked at my cock I got an erection. He laughed it off. "It happens to the best of us at the most awkward times," he told me. I was mortified. "What's more concerning are the marks on your buttocks," he said. Oh god! I'd forgotten about that. I quickly came up with a story about falling backwards at work and landing arse first on a wooden pallet. He seemed to believe me. He then asked me why I'd shaved. My face was beetroot red with embarrassment and I fumbled for an answer before saying that a girl I was seeing had asked me to do it as an experiment.

What surprised me most was that I didn't try to get my jeans on. I just stood there with my erection on show while he made some joke about the things we do for women. He told me I'd be amazed how many competitive swimmer's shave. "I used to shave my whole body. Legs, armpits, everything," he said smiling. Then he headed off to the shower.

I stood there briefly, almost in shock. I was rock hard. What the fuck was happening to me? I quickly got dressed before anyone else could see me and left.

The journey home was about 2 miles but I'd always enjoyed walking and the weather was pleasant. I couldn't get over my coach seeing me both shaved and hard. Why hadn't I tried to cover myself? Or put my jeans on instead of standing there with an erection while he talked to me? Perhaps he'd seen that kind of thing before. After all, he'd been a coach for quite a few years so I was sure he'd seen lots of things. As with Phillip though, I began to think if he'd liked what he saw. I also thought about his cock. It was so big compared to my own. I started to fantasise about sucking it. Wondering how much bigger it might be when fully hard.

God, I must try and stop these thoughts. Maybe Phillip was right when he told me I was a natural cocksucker. Is that what I was? Whatever, I needed to relax and be happy with myself. I enjoyed Phillips cock in my mouth. What I didn't anticipate was thinking about other men's cocks. I decided to accept that I enjoyed it. As long as I was sensible and able to realise that not every guy was like Phillip, I should be fine. But I must try and find a way to deal with my exhibitionism in normal circumstances.

I was about half a mile from home, still wondering how I would overcome my excitement in everyday situations, when I heard a car pull up next to me. It was my coach. He smiled and said he was glad he'd caught up with me. "Hop in," he said. "I'll drive you home so you're not late for your family event." It took me by surprise. He had never offered to drive me home before. "I think we need to have a chat but I don't want to make you late," he said as we set off. I explained it was ok and that I'd only used a family event as an excuse not to have a shower. He understood right away asking if it was because I didn't want the others to see that I'd shaved. I nodded and told him I was scared what they might think. "Competitive swimmers shave all the time," he said. "Don't worry what the others say. I'll back you up if they try taking the piss." I thanked him saying it would definitely help.

"No need to thank me Dave, but that's not the thing I need to talk to you about," he told me. knew what was coming and I started to feel uncomfortable. We were nearly at my house by then but he diverted telling me he'd drop me off when we'd finished. I could feel my face flushing already. "I'll just come right out with it Dave. Are you gay?" I told him I wasn't. "It's just, well, that was some display you put on by the lockers. You didn't even try to hide it Dave." I was struggling to respond. "That's not something I see very often. So I need to make sure it won't happen in front of the others," he told me. "I don't have any issues with your sexuality, but the other lads might not be so understanding"

I told him I understood what he was saying and that I couldn't explain why it happened. I explained that I would do my best to make sure it didn't happen again. "It's ok if you're gay Dave," he said. "You can be honest with me, but it is something I need to be aware of. We wouldn't need to tell the others if that's what you're worried about." I wondered why was he being so insistent about me being gay. I could feel how red my face was and I could feel my cock getting hard. I adjusted my position so it didn't become noticeable. "You were staring at my cock and you got an erection Dave," he stated. His face was deadly serious.

I scrambled to think. I don't know what made me say it, but I just told him I was going through some confusion about my sexuality, but again assured him I wasn't gay. I told him I was sorry he'd seen me doing it. "Doing it?" he asked and I nodded. "You mean staring at my cock," he stated. I nodded numbly. 2 days ago this would never have happened. My life was fine. "Say it" he told me.

"I'm sorry you saw me staring at your cock," I admitted, my face flushing even more. My erection was so strong at that moment.

"Dave, it's ok. You're a young guy and probably just going through what most young men go through. It's understandable to be curious. We've all been there. Just make sure that if you're going to look, do it so the others dont see and keep your dick soft," he said with a smile.

With that the conversation was over and he went on to talk about next week's competition before dropping me home. God, how embarrassing I thought as I got indoors. Then it hit me what he'd actually said. Was I being stupid or did he just give me permission to look at his cock? The more I thought about it the more certain I was. I went straight upstairs to my bedroom and masturbated.

Now my coach was the second man to see me naked and erect.

I had swimming club again on Wednesday. I did my best to put thoughts of Phillip and my coach out of my head over the next few days. The more I tried, the worse it got. It was easier during the daytimes. I continued to search for a full time job, do errands for my mother and socialise during the evenings. In bed at night it was different. My head was a mass of fantasies. Images and wild thoughts that flashed through my mind. The porn magazines, photos and polaroids of Tracey filled my night-time thoughts. Not forgetting what had happened with Phillip. I masturbated furiously. Often more than once.

It felt like a Phillip had unleashed a beast inside me and I couldn't keep it caged. Everywhere I went I looked at men's crotches and arses. I even began to look at Lewis sexually. Not to mention women. I found myself searching for ladies with large or extra large arses. It was becoming an obsession. Unfortunately most women with bottoms that large were much older than me and I naturally thought they'd have no interest in a youngster. However, it didn't stop me looking.

On Tuesday I shaved myself. It was difficult at first but I quickly learned how best to do so. When I was finished I was very satisfied with the results. I loved the feeling of being freshly shaved and would always get an erection afterwards. It reminded me that I was doing it for Phillip.

On Wednesday I arrived at swimming club and had decided I was just going to get undressed as normal. It was a huge thing for me when Lewis and the others saw me shaved. A couple of guys actually laughed, but the others, including Lewis just stared. Coach was true to his word and backed me up, even suggesting that if I was going to "shave for competition", I should go the whole hog and do my legs, arms and armpits too. The others were shocked by that but they quickly assumed I'd discussed it with him. Lewis even said he might give it a go. So it was left like that. Somehow I managed to keep my erection under control. On the way to the pool I thanked coach. He just patted me on the back and said "No worries."

Training went well and we all showered together afterwards with no accidental erections from me. I went out of my way not to think of anything sexual or look at the other cocks, although I admit it was difficult. I purposely stayed in the shower longer than the others so as not to see them naked and getting dressed. When I got out the only people left were coach and Lewis. Coach was still drying himself but Lewis was already dressed. He told me he'd get me a drink the pool cafe so I thanked him before he left. I started to dry myself off and coach sat down on the bench next to me, saying I'd done well. "That must have taken a lot of courage Dave," he said. When I turned to say thank you for his support he was sitting on his towel on the bench with his legs wide open. It actually looked like he was showing his large cock off to me deliberately.

I have no idea what he was talking to me about because I just couldn't take my eyes from it. It looked slightly larger than usual and I admired his light brown trimmed pubic hair. I had the thought that I'd never noticed that it was trimmed before. He had a full foreskin that covered the glans completely with a little excess skin. It looked thicker too. Probably as thick as Phillips was when he was erect. For the first time I noticed the long thick vein that ran along the length on the left side, then up and on to the top of his foreskin to the tip. The skin was light and the vein blue. His balls were about the same size as mine but hung loosely, whereas mine always seemed to sit tighter to my body. I must have been mesmerised because I didn't even realise I was erect until I looked down to see my cock pulsing.

He continued to talk as if nothing was unusual, but his cock definitely began to thicken and grow a little. I just stood there bone hard nodding or making affirmation noises. Then he stood up and moved to get dressed, telling me he'd see me on Sunday.

It was definitely a moment. I was certain of that. There was no way he wasn't purposely showing me his cock. The way he was smiling at me as he held his legs wide apart. There was no way he hadn't noticed me looking at it or my solid erection.

I finished dressing and joined Lewis in the cafe. We chatted and he asked me when I'd thought about shaving. I told him I thought some of the Olympic swimmer's looked like they shaved so had asked coach about it. He'd confirmed some did, believing that body hair could be the difference between winning or losing by as much as 1/100th of a second. So I'd decided to try it but had forgotten about my legs and arms. He didn't disbelieve me and asked me what it felt like, so I told him it was weird at first but I soon got used to it. I told him I'd be completely shaved for the competition on Sunday. He was impressed by my courage to do it, even suggesting he might consider doing the same thing at some point.

When I went to bed that evening I went through what had happened with coach. I'd definitely enjoyed him seeing me so hard. I liked the thought that he knew his cock had that effect on me. Yet he didn't do anything other than talk to me. It was bizarre what was happening to me. It almost felt like people suddenly saw me differently. As if they knew what I'd been doing with Phillip, but I knew that was impossible. Was I somehow different and people new I was bisexual? Even Lewis was talking about shaving. Had he looked at me and been turned on by what he saw or was he just interested in doing it to improve his swimming times? I also knew I had to shave the rest of my body to keep up the facade too.

It just felt like my life had suddenly changed and everyone around had changed with me.

The following day was a rush. I was back at work later, I'd see Phillip again and he knew I wouldn't have wearing underpants. My mind raced with fantasies and I suffered with repeated erections. I decided to shave the rest of my body too, hoping Phillip would like it. I had to do it anyway otherwise everyone at the swimming club would think I was lying about why I'd done it in the first place. The only places I had hair on my body were my legs, arms and armpits anyway. Other that those areas I was smooth. When I'd finished the feeling was immense. Completely hairless from the neck down I felt simply awesome, albeit slightly strange.

As I walked to work I considered whether I should tell Phillip about what had happened with coach. He would probably be able to explain it to me. He was so knowledgeable about these things, of that I was certain. I also knew I wanted to taste his thick cock again. I'd missed it and with everything that had been happening, I was highly turned on. I needed the release that Phillip and I shared. I needed to feel the embarrassment of exposure. I needed to feel his eyes on my nakedness and I hoped my additional shaving would be a nice surprise for him. I wanted him to see I wasn't wearing underpants, just as he had instructed.

Phillip was his usual self at work. Nothing was mentioned about sex. He acted like my employer, although he did seem a little more preoccupied than usual. I assumed he had worries like any other person and went about my work duties. Strangely, even this act of normality turned me on. Watching him interact with customers, I wondered what they might think if they knew he enjoyed pushing his cock in my mouth. That he had spanked, belted and shaved me. It turned me on so much watching this ordinary man knowing how extraordinary he was to me.

My evening shift went by quickly and before long it was closing time. Phillip locked the doors. As he went upstairs he told me to sweep and mop the floor, then call him when I'd finished. I rushed to get the tasks completed and within half an hour I was calling upstairs to let him know I was done. He told me to wait and he'd come down.