Guys go through everything together without having to say a word, sometimes, especially without saying a word.
You don't find a lot of groups of friends like the one I have. We met in third grade, all of us completely different, but we played together and never stopped hanging out after that. Bad grades, parents' divorces, grandparent's dying, that incident with the cop, girlfriends, they all came and went but we stuck together. There were six of us. Jerry was the cool guy, always gel in his hair, always a girlfriend on his arm and the newest clothes. Jacob was the smart one, he spoke four languages and got into Stanford recently, we're all only 21 and yet he already made national news speaking for unemployment rates for Latin-American youths. He's going to make it far.
Franz is the loser, a punk rocker who takes drugs for breakfast and aspires nothing but will cheer you up like no boy ever will. Darryl is the artist, he plays piano for us, sometimes all evening, or blows us away with another kick ass group portret he drew on Photoshop. Zafar is the quiet one, he cares for only two things; working out and reading, he sort of comes and goes when he pleases but when you need him he's there.
Then there's me, Tom, I'm the boring one. I don't have a glowing career working at the local food market, I didn't get into the college I wanted and I've never had a girlfriend. I always felt like I tried to be like the other guys but I'm not. Yet, they hang out with me all the same. They're more my family than my family.
I lost my virginity to one of Jerry's girlfriends last year, in his backseat while he was driving. We were all drunk, and they were arguing. Out of revenge, she sat on my lap and started riding me, continiously looking at him. Jerry looked back through the mirror and I came so fast thinking of how he was watching me, the girl got mad I came inside. Aside from that night I never had sex again. Not until one strange night in november.
We were at Franz' house, hanging out, smoking weed and watching porn. We'd do that together so often it wasn't a big deal. It was more like background noise while we discussed life and the world and girls. Mostly Franz' many sisters. I'm sure Jerry has been through them all, but me and Darryl still fantasized away. Heck, I'm sure even Franz did, the pervert. At Franz' place, Darryl couldn't do much with his restlessness so he played on Franz' ancient game boy. Seeing Darryl do anything wasn't like seeing normal people do stuff. When Darryl ate he savoured every flavor and bite, when he drank he looked like he was in a commercial, and when he played his eyes opened wide and he immersed himself in the game, as boring as it was. It's not uncommon that our evening activity was just watching Darryl do stuff in his weird, almost zen like manner. I loved it.
I don't know what it was about that night, but one of Franz' sisters, Lora, had joined the party, fascinated by the porn, and the conversation with Zafir and Franz (which is a hilarious duo about topics like sex) turned to what guys found erotic. Not hot, not horny, erotic. When Franz and Lora were in a heavy discussion and Zafar only interjected when he really disagreed, I kept looking at Darryl. And in that moment, I realized, it was he who turned me on. His long black curly hairs which looked so soft and healthy, were draped over his face, bouncing with the wild movements of his head. His big rugged fingers, which had carved many statues, played many strings or dugged in many soils, strongly pressed the buttons on the device. His eyes, his piercing eyes, focused on the toy, never waning, never seizing to have that addictive spark. And that smile. His thin lips revealed shining white teeth and a happiness I'm not sure many of us ever experience. He wasn't playing a game, he was living it. And that enthusiasm, I found, was highly erotic. As Franz' described nothing short of the porn he was seeing as being erotic, I looked at my friend, whom I had known for so many years, who was heartbroken over his recent split with his girlfriend and hadn't thought of women or sex since, and I wanted to kiss him. Shocked by my thoughts, I returned to the conversation.
"Licking a clit is not erotic, idiot, that's just your porn addiction. You wouldn't find one if you tried," Lora said jokingly.
"I have found so many, I'd bet I could find yours," Franz quipped.
"I swear mom was drunk when she was pregnant with you, you're sick!" Lora threw a pillow at her brother and took the last hit from the joint.
"Hey! That was my last one, bitch" Franz threw the pillow back and Lora had to cough. We all laughed, well, those who noticed. Franz was so pissed he decided to get some harder stuff from his local dealer, and off he went. Which left Lora rather uncomfortable with us watching porn.
"I'm heading to bed for the night, pervs" she laughed as she walked away. I could see the disappointment on Zafir's face. He probably wanted to bang her. She turned the TV off because of the noise and left.
"I'm going too guys." Darryl suddenly said. I was shocked and caught myself with the same look as Zafir on my face. This is Darryl to the max. He's so random he will up and leave because he absolutely has to in that moment and there is no stopping him. I don't know what came over me but I got up and gave him a hug goodbye. We never do that. At most we bump fists and at the very least we say "like we care, faggot!" But there I was hugging him. Of course Darryl returned the hug, Darryl encouraged all expressions of love.
He smiled, with that beautiful smile at me and said "yeah man", while patting me on the back. He nodded to Zafir and left. I was left standing with a raging hard on, turned away from Zafir. I wanted to go home and jerk off, but was afraid to walk right now. So instead I sat down in the hopes of getting rid of my bulge.
Unfortunately, Zafir turned on the porn again, on mute.
"Damn, that chick is so god damn sexy". Zafir suddenly said, to my surprise. Zafir never used that kind of language. He was eloquent, respected religion and when he spoke of women it was with a feminist message. But when I looked over I didn't see Zafir, the guy who didn't eat for a week all in school because of some dying children somewhere. I saw a big, grown up man, masculine and dominant, who was looking at the screen but fantasizing about a girl in another room with relentless horniness. He turned to me, his eyes malicious and sly. "I'm too fucking horny, aren't you?"
I laughed the comment off. I was suddenly completely insecure. Was he always like this? Were his impressive intelligent debates with Jacob mere smoke and mirrors? Was his silence just a calculating horniness?
"Let's play a game." He said, staring at me without interruption. I couldn't even say "alright" or "no", I was so intimidated. "Go into Lora's room and get her dirty panties off the floor."
"What?!" I thought, but didn't say. "How do you know she took them off?" I asked, surprised by my own train of thought.
"I know because me and Franz have sneaked in to watch her sleep before. She sleeps naked. He smiled duplicious. The thought of them staring at her turned me on, strangely and the thought of Zafir daring me even more so.
I don't know why I got up, but I did. Everything told me this was wrong, stupid and shameful, but I did it anyway. Zafir's eyes followed me and encouraged me to complete a mission. I wanted to impress him, I wanted to be as much of a man as he was.
The door of Lora's room squeeked, but Lora was vast asleep. The linnen was only half draped over her, exposing one beautiful rounded breast. It reminded me of a painting, but more importantly, it did nothing to me compared to Darryl's smile. On the ground, lay her bra and thong, which strangely did arouse me. I creeped closer, but her breath exellerated and I got scared. "No, Zafir will think you're a pussy if you come back empty handed". I got so close I could feel the warmth of her breath and saw the boob up close. I kneeled before it and picked up the underwear. I stared at her for a moment too long when she snorted and looked to wake up. I sprinted to the door, it squeeked open and I closed it behind me, certain I awoke her and pretending I didn't. She didn't make a sound nor got up. I breathed out.
Triumphantly I returned to Zafir, teasingly bungeling the pieces of clothing before me, pretending to sniff them. Zafir, however, gave me no validation at all. Instead he looked at me, angry almost, and commanded "put them on". I laughed again, but knew he was dead serious. I looked back at Lora's room and confirmed she was still asleep. "What?! What does it matter if she's asleep, you're not considering this!" I said to myself. But I did. Zafir's stern eyes commanded me and I didn't want to make him mad.
I walked around the couch and almost like I was at the doctor's office, I removed my clothing. Zafir didn't look at my body, he looked at my eyes. It was strangely comforting. Without hesitation I pulled down my boxers, standing naked, with my lean, slim body, in front of the big guy in the tight shirt that always looked like it would rip under the stress of packing those muscles. I knew Zafir wasn't turned on by my nakedness, or my dick, which had turned hard. I nodded and put on the thong and tucked my small hard dick in. Damn that felt soft and comfortable, no wonder women love to wear these. The thread in my ass crack was amazing. Then I put on the bra, at least, I tried. I had no idea how those clips worked. Annoyed, Zafir stepped towards me, spinned me around and clipped them tight himself. I got nervous, feeling his big hands on my naked skin, his heavy breathing in my neck. In front of me a slut was getting pumped by two guys.
