Rory and Philip

This chapter is long, and spends a lot of time exploring Rory's relationship with Angie. He and Philip get back together later in the chapter to explore more sexuality. The story involves male-on-male sex, so if that's not your thing, please find a different story. If nonstop fucking is what you are after, then you may want to pick a different story, or skip (way) ahead to the "After Angie drove away, I went to find Philip."

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I headed back to my dorm room, needing to address some homework and get some things for my volleyball practice. I knew that Angie, my BFF from high school was coming to meet Philip and see if she approves. Since I'd not told my parents anything about being gay, she'd been my only confidant before hooking up with Philip. Her coming to "check up on him" was a little aggravating, but mostly sweet that she was so concerned about me.

I also started to think about telling my mother. I suspected that she suspected, but I'd never said anything, and I certainly did not tell my father. He'd never understand, and if I told my mother, I was afraid of it being a wedge that would go between the two of them. I struggled with all of this. I loved my father, and he'd taught me a lot of things growing up, but he was also a part of that "God hates fags!" church, and I was certain that he'd disown (or worse!) me if he knew. And my mother, well, I didn't think that she'd disown me, but it would make things even harder between her and my dad.

I walked into my dorm room and was greeted by my roommate, Scott.

"More video games?" he asked with a knowing tone in his voice. I could feel that my face went crimson and I'd just told him the answer without speaking.

"Well, yeah, more than just video games, this time," I confessed.

"Hey, like I told you before, it's all OK with me - in fact, good for you! Good for both of you! I've known Philip for a while and he seems like a nice guy, and so I'm glad you two are getting along. By the way, I'm going to leave in about a half an hour to go home overnight - my girlfriend's mother is turning 50 and she wants me to be there for the party tonight."

"Hey, do you mind if my high school friend stays here for the night, then?" I asked, "She's a frosh at UK, but is coming for a visit."

"She?" he asked.

"Yeah, but not like you're thinking. She knew I was gay even before I did, and she's just been my rock in all of this. She may not stay, but just in case?"

"Sure, no worries, but change the bed?"

"Yeah, I will."

Scott left and I got to my homework. I'd been working for an hour or so when my phone rang - it was Angie.

"Hey, Angie!" I said into the phone.

"Hey, yourself!" she replied, "I'm here, where can I find you?"

I told her how to get to my dorm and went downstairs to let her in.

We hugged tightly, and she kissed me on the cheek.

"I'm so happy for you!" she said, then added, "And a little bit concerned!"

"Concerned, why?" I asked her.

"Because, you've never dated or anything, and I'm worried that he's going to just break your heart, or use you up and throw you away. Or that you're going to mistake lust and sex appeal with real love and throw yourself at the first person who came along and gave you an orgasm."

Aside from getting into details that I never thought I would with Angie, I noticed a couple of people in the lobby area looking at us and suggested that we table the conversation until we were more private.

We walked up to my room, where she continued.

"Look, Rory, after talking to Philip the other day, I feel a little better, but I am still a bit worried about your text - the one where you said, and I quote 'I think I'm in love!'. Lots of people fall for their first partners - especially if they don't just fuck and run, but then they get their hearts broken. Have you two talked about this? Are you ready to have an exclusive relationship? Is he?"

"I - I don't - I guess I don't know. No, we have not discussed it, we've just been having fun together, but so far we've also been keeping up with classes and other things. When I told him that I needed time to do homework and such he was quite easy about the whole thing."

"Well, that's all fine and good, but look, just don't fall in love too fast. Sex is wonderful and all, but there's more to a love life than just sex."

I just looked at her. This was all very surreal - having this conversation with her. It seems like one I should be having with a parent, but that's impossible. Without warning I reached over and hugged her.

"I can see that you are doing all of this because you care - thank you for caring!"

"Rory, you big dope! I love you! I've told you that a million times now! Of course I care! Now when do I get to meet this predator?"

"Angie, don't call him that!"

"I'm kidding you, Rory! If I thought he was a predator I'd have been talking you out of seeing him altogether. I just want you to be cautious, that's all."

"Well, we have a volleyball practice session in half an hour, you can come along, or we can meet you here afterward, what's your preference?"

"How about you go and I'll stay here and do some of my own studying, and I'll see you after?"

"Um, I need to get changed," I told her.

"Don't let me stop you!" she said, "We both play for the same team, so it's no big deal, right? Besides, I have to study so I won't pay any attention!"

I looked at her a little surprised, and thought that she was joking.

"OK, I'll just do it," I said to her.

"Go ahead, I already told you to!"

She started to open her book bag and just continued doing what she was doing, and I decided that I just needed to change, so I did, stripping out of my loose shorts and boxers and pulling on some supportive sport underwear and a different pair of shorts and t-shirt.

"Damn, Rory," she said, "if you weren't gay, and my best friend forever I'd be very tempted by you!"

"Hey, you said you weren't going to pay any attention!" I protested.

"Well, I lied - I'll return the favor sometime, maybe!" she said laughing.

I headed out to our practice. We had a good session and when we were done, Philip went back to his place to shower and change, and promised to stop by my room when he was done. He was nervous, saying that he felt like he was meeting my parents or something.

"Oh dear God no!" I said, "it's just Angie!"

I went back to my room and grabbed my shower stuff and some clean clothes and started for the shower. Noticing my clothes, Angie said, "Aw! No show this time!"

I flipped her a bird as I went out.

When I returned from the shower I found Philip already in my room talking to Angie. They were chatting away like old friends when I went into the room.

"Hey!" Angie said as I walked in. "We were just talking a bit!"

"I promised you dinner, I believe," Philip said, "Shall we make it a threesome?"

"Sure," I replied, "if it's OK with you?" I nodded toward Angie.

We walked to a nearby restaurant - not a fancy place, but good for college students on a limited budget. We sat and ordered food, and then got to talking.

"So, Philip, I'm going to be direct, here," Angie started, "I love this guy - he's the brother I never had, and I'm very protective. He's been kind of sheltered, and I guess, kind of held prisoner, so he doesn't have a lot of experience with dating and relationships, not to mention sex. I want to know what you're looking for - are you a love 'em and leave 'em kind of guy?"

I was totally embarrassed by how directly she was going after him.

"Angie, we haven't even talked about most of that, I think you're going too fast!" I complained.

"No," Philip said, "it's OK, Rory. I think she brings up good points, and again, she's protective of you, and that's OK. I appreciate her concerns, so let me address them. First, and foremost, I've never been a 'love them and leave them' kind of guy. I've had only a couple of real relationships, though I have dated several guys - usually things didn't last because I felt like the other guy did fit into that category. When I first met you, Rory, I did not know of your inexperience, and I don't think of myself as a predator, I just saw a cute guy who carried himself well, and I wanted to get to know you. I didn't force you into anything, at least, I don't think I did."

"No, on our first meeting we just played video games and talked," I said.

"That's right," he continued, "though I wanted more, I'll tell you that, but you did not seem ready. So, Angie, as to what am I looking for? I am just looking to get to know Rory better. We've had a physical relationship, and I've enjoyed that a ton, but we are still getting to know each other, and I'm enjoying that."

"Are you looking for a long term relationship?" she asked, "or just a 'friends with benefits' kind of thing?"

"I don't think it's either one, really. More the long term thing, but again, we're just getting to know each other. He's a freshman, I'm a sophomore - I'm not looking to settle down yet, and I don't think he should be either."

I wasn't sure how I felt. I was infatuated with this guy, and I loved the sex - I was learning so much - but he was right, we were awfully young.

"I'm certainly not looking to hurt him or break his heart," Philip continued, "but if you are looking for me to say that I want to spend my life with someone, then I'm not ready for that!"

"And I'm not either!" I interjected.

Angie took in what we were saying, and eyed us both

"Angie," I continued after a bit of silence, "realistically, I will probably change majors at least once, and so might you, and maybe even Philip. We are all too young to know. Similarly, it's way too early to be thinking about a life partner. That being said, I like Philip - a lot! - but I don't want to rush things. I hope that we stay friends forever, and lovers for a long time, but we have to let it all play out. I know enough about him to feel that he's not just going to dump me, but we have a long way to go."

"I agree, I like Rory - a lot, too!" Philip said looking toward me, and taking my hand, "and I can assure you that I'm not 'using' him in any way. We genuinely like each other and we are just going with the flow right now. We'll see where it takes us, but we are being honest with one another!"

Angie sat there looking at us - first Philip, then me, then Philip again.

"OK," she said, "I'm satisfied - for now - but," she said looking right at Philip, "he's my brother, and I'll stand up for him through hell and back, so I better not hear that you've done anything to him, you hear me? I will kick your ass!"

"I know you will!" he said, then added, "I really do appreciate your fierce loyalty to him - it helps me know how special he is!"

Our food came and we ate and talked - about more light subjects this time. When we'd eaten, Philip asked if we all wanted to go to his place and play some video games. Angie was less enthused than Philip or I, but she agreed. She would play video games with me when she came to my house, but was never really into them much.

We sat in Philip's room playing until it was getting late.

"Hey, I need to go," Angie said, "It's a long drive back to Lawrence."

"What?" I said, "you can't start driving back now, it's way too late!"

"Are you my mother?" she said to me.

"No, lest I need to remind you, I'm your brother, and I don't want you falling asleep driving back. My roommate is out for the night, so you can sleep in my room."

She looked at me with her eyebrow raised.

"Don't look at me in that tone of voice!" I said, "You know darn well I don't mean that! You need sleep and there is a space for you to do it in without driving all the way back there now!"

"OK, I'll take you up on that," she said, "but I have to leave right after breakfast, OK?"

"Sold," I said.

We got ready to leave and Philip took me in his arms and whispered to me "I was kind of hoping you'd stay here!"

"How about tomorrow after breakfast?" I asked.

"I can't wait!" he said to me.

Angie and I left and walked back to my dorm. We walked arm in arm.

"OK," she said, "I like him. I like that he likes you and you like him. I want you to talk to me, though, please? Let me know if there's anything going on in your head or in your heart, you got it?"

"OK, sis!" I said.

"Sis is it?" she laughed.

We got to my room and she headed to the bathroom. I told her that there was a ladies bathroom down one floor, but that it was not unusual for women to use the one on this floor.

"There are stalls, but there's also a bank of urinals and guys will just walk in and use them no matter who's in there. The sinks are around the corner, so once you are there you're usually safe. Oh, and sometimes there are people who have sex in the showers, that's not too unusual, either."

"So, I can walk down the stairs and use a relatively clean ladies room, or skip the stairs and use a disgusting guy's room? Stairs it is!"

"Well, I've never been in the ladies room, so I can't vouch for it being clean or not, but yeah, the bathroom on this floor can get disgusting!"

She headed downstairs, and I went to the bathroom on our floor, and peed and brushed my teeth. When I got back, I quickly put clean sheets on Scott's bed.

Angie got back and noticed the freshly made bed.

"Oh!" she said, "I thought I was sleeping in your bed with you!"

"That would be pretty cramped!" I replied.

"I don't mind getting close to you, that way you don't have to change your roomie's sheets again tomorrow."

I was getting really tired.

"Well, OK, whatever, I'm getting too tired to argue with you."

I scooted to the wall side of the bed, and pulled back the sheet for her. She kicked off her sandals and immediately pulled off her shorts, draping them across my desk chair, then grabbed the hem of her t-shirt and pulled it over her head, also depositing it on the chair. Now standing in front of me wearing only her underwear, she reached behind her back and unsnapped her bra, letting it fall forward and put it on top of the other things on the chair.

"Angie, what the hell are you doing?" I asked.

"Getting ready for bed," she replied, completely unfazed by standing in front of me with only her panties.

"Like that? With just your panties on?"

She put her hands on her hips and looked at me.

"What are you wearing?" she asked.

"A pair of boxers," I replied.

"Right, so this is how I sleep, too!"

"No bra?"

"Have you ever tried to sleep with a bra on?"

I just looked at her, "Of course not!"

"Well, they bind up and pull and pinch, and I just don't do it!"

She got into bed next to me. It was a really small bed for two people. I'd shared the same sized bed with Philip, but that was different as we were trying to touch each other. Angie and I lay there, side by side with barely enough room.

"Thanks for letting me stay," she said. "I really did not want to drive back tonight."

"You're welcome," I said back to her, "I didn't want to think about you driving all that way this late."

I also did not want to think about her lying there next to me wearing just her panties, or me with just my boxers.

"I bet you wanted to stay with Philip, didn't you?"

"Yeah, but that's OK. We have time - you're right, we shouldn't move too fast."

I was lying there, petrified. She turned on her side and propped her head on her hand. I did my best not to notice her tits.

"You know that I mean it when I tell you that I love you, don't you."

I just lay there looking straight up at the ceiling.

"Yes, Angie, I know. And I appreciate you everyday. I can't talk to Mom and I sure as hell can't talk to Dad about any of this. It's good to know that you have my back, even if you are overprotective."

"Overprotective?" she replied.

"Yes, but I love you for it."

"Why won't you look at me?" she asked. I didn't move, or speak. "Rory?"

"Because you're half naked, and it's confusing me," I confessed.

"Confusing you how?" she asked.

"Because you're like my sister, and I'm gay."

"So?"

"Well, you're lying here in bed next to me half naked, so why do I want to look at your, um, your breasts?"

"They're just boobs, Rory. I live on a coed floor and half the girls there walk around topless in the hallway going to or from the shower, it's not a big deal!"

I was still staring at the ceiling.

"Look at me. Look at my tits. They're too big and saggy for a 19 year old, but they are what they are, and I'm comfortable around you, and it's OK."

"OK because I'm 'safe'?"

"A little, yeah, but OK because I love you, my brother. Remember you got changed in front of me earlier."

"Yeah, but..." I started, then stopped.

"But what?" she pushed me.

"But why do I feel excited? I'm gay, you're a woman, why do I find this exciting?"

"Exciting like... like what?"

"Like down below!" I said. I was still just staring at the ceiling.

"Oh! Wow! Well, Rory, I'm flattered, and a bit intrigued, but I love you like a brother, not a lover. I'll admit there was a time when I wanted you more like that, but realizing that you are gay changed that. I love you so much - I really do! - but I know that you are meant for someone else - maybe Philip, maybe someone else - but you will only be completed with another gay man. I know that, and you know that. I'm comfortable with you - comfortable enough to sleep with you in this small bed and be here topless with you. You can look if you want - I'm OK with that. I'll strip completely for you if you are curious, but I won't have sex with you - that's between you and your boyfriend. I do want you to stop staring at the ceiling, though."

I finally turned and looked her in the eye.

"That's better!" she said. "You know, I keep telling you that I love you like a brother, but it's more than that, I think. I don't want us to sleep together, well, not have sex together, but I do want to do this!"

She leaned in and kissed me on the lips. She put her hand around my head and pulled me closer to her and we kissed for a while. My cock was definitely stirring, but deep down I knew that she was right, I could not deny who I am.

She sat back, and I was still looking right at her face.

"I love you, too, Angie. Even if my sexual responses are confusing me, I know that you're right. I'm so lucky that I grew up next door and have you as a friend. I don't know where I'd be without you."

She smiled at me. "I'm lucky to know you, too, and I'm happy that we can share like this. I can't imagine sharing like this with anyone else. I know that we're all to young to commit to a life partner, but promise me that we'll always be friends."

"Whoever my life partner is, if I'm lucky enough to find one, they'll never replace you and they'll just have to get used to you and me having something extra special."

I leaned in and kissed her. I sat back, and my eyes moved down to her breasts. I'd seen her in a swimsuit often while we worked as lifeguards, so I knew that they were large, but bared in front of me like this, they seemed enormous.

"See? Too saggy for a 19 year old."

"You sell yourself short, Angie, they're beautiful, though this is still very weird to me."

"Still turning you on?" she asked, then quickly added, "No! Don't tell me that - this is not about sex - I'm just going to sleep."

"Right, just going to sleep - sure!"

She rolled onto her side, facing away from me.

"Good night, Rory, I love you!"

"Good night, Angie, I love you, too!"

"Now, this bed is too small for anything else - spoon with me!" she said.

I scooted up next to her, keeping my crotch clear of her butt, and draped an arm over her, being sure to keep it at her waist.

"Very good! When I get back to school I'm going to tell people that I slept with a gay man!" she said, laughing.