Role Model Behavior

"Hey, Kev!" my sister called from the other room. "Telephone, Kev." I slid my tv dinner in the stove real quick to keep it warm and wiped my hands before padding over to the phone.

"Hello," I said into the receiver while carrying it into the kitchen with me.

"You ready?" asked a familiar voice, a voice I'd been dying to hear for almost 7 months now.

"Raymond?!" I exclaimed. "Shit, I can't believe it's you!"

"Whoa, kid. Watch the language," my uncle teased. "Save it for when I kick your ass at bowling tonight. You're gonna be swearing up a storm!"

I just smiled ear to ear, more than happy to take a few insults from Uncle Ray. He and I had always been very close and bowling was our "thing." It was something we used to do at least one weekend a month together, but a bad marriage had brought that to a screeching halt. As an ex-policeman Ray was a fighter. He was the type to stick anything out, but I think all of that patience and determination only crippled him in the end when it came to women. There were so many times early on in his marriage when he should have just walked away. I guess something inside wouldn't let him give up.

I saw Ray less and less beginning around a year ago. Then one day something just sent him over the edge. He never told any of us what, but we all knew it had something to do with his wife. His visits from Reno came to a stand still and so did all of his phone calls. The only way any of us even knew he hadn't died was because a family friend and co-worker of his let us know that he was still showing up to the job everyday, yet his behavior was distant and seemingly disturbed. I remember how much it hurt me to hear this because Ray had been one of my greatest role models in life, especially after Dad (his older brother) had been promoted within his company and it required him to be on the east coast more often than not these days. My uncle sort of filled in as a father for me.

I figured I wouldn't ask Ray any questions about his disappearance when he arrived. It was something he'd obviously rather keep out of mind. When he finally swung by to get me that night I nearly leaped into his truck. "How goes it, Kevin?" he asked me while pulling out of the driveway.

"It's goin' great, now."

"I see you got a new bowling bag. Remind me to buy another one too when we get to the alley. I think the one I've been using all these years is finally shot."

[No kidding,] I thought to myself. The bag was splitting near the handles and had tiny chew marks in it from the two weeks he spent pet-sitting for a friend's new dog.

When we arrived at the bowling alley it was only half-full. Everybody must've been waiting for the Friday night discount prices that begin around 9:30, but my uncle and I were ready to play through.

I set up the board with our names on it while Ray hit the in-house bar. He brought back a couple of beers and tossed me one. My eyes flew open a bit and I started looking around cautiously. "Cool it," he whispered with a grin. "Nobody knows," he assured me, referring to the fact that I was still two years under drinking age. The beer was cold, refreshing, and well appreciated by my entire body. Something had gone wrong with the air conditioning unit in this place and the huge fans everywhere just weren't cutting it. Before I knew it, it was time for another beer. "Well, hot damn..." Ray whispered while running a hand through his shaggy brown hair that was almost long enough to touch his shoulders. "You've gotten real good. I can't believe you beat me this time," he remarked.

"Yeah, one game out of four," I reminded him. We were both quiet for a moment while I collected my thoughts. It was important for me to say something. "I'm really glad you came down, Ray. And I don't just mean that in a small way. I look up to you, ya know...it was hard not hearing from you all this time," I said genuinely. It wasn't often that I opened up like this.

"Well..." Ray wouldn't look anywhere near me. He just stared at his beer bottle while gently peeling the label off with his thumb nail. "I just needed a break from some stuff and...and now I'm back." He tried to smile at me finally, but it looked pitiful. I could tell he still had a lot on his mind.

We played one more game before Ray decided that it was time to wrap things up. We drove home talking about me and school. He recounted one of my favorite stories from his own schooldays about the time he accidentally tripped the administration lady and she fell into a garbage can. "Alright, bud. It was nice seeing you again," said Ray as we pulled up toward my house.

"What?" I asked. "Aren't you commin' in?" My uncle shook his head. "Don't tell me you're driving all the way back up to Reno tonight. I thought you were gonna stay the weekend like usual."

"Listen Kev, I love spendin' time with you and all, its easy being with YOU...but I don't think I can face your parents or the rest of the family. I don't want them asking questions. Not about my marriage, where I've been lately, nothin'," Ray shrugged. "I really just came down to see you. I'm 38 years old and you're the closest thing I have to a son. I knew I had to find the time."

"But, but..." I was so disappointed. "Then let me go with you. I'll follow you in my car and drive back down Sunday night before school."

"No, you'll be bored," Ray shook his head slightly while gently rubbing his short beard with one hand.

"I'm goin'!" I insisted. I could tell that Ray wanted me to. A quick venture back into the house for a change of clothes, my car keys, and we were off.

+++

Ray's house was just as I remembered it. The only thing different were all the empty spaces on the walls where pictures of him and his wife had once hung. I didn't want to be nosey, so I tried not to stare.

My uncle seemed different once we got to his house. I thought he was just tired at first, but now I could tell that something much deeper was bothering him. "The uh, the guest room's all set up if you wanna go ahead and put your stuff in there now. I think I'm gonna turn in early, but feel free to stay up as long as you want. You know the rules around here," said uncle. "Sure, that there are no rules."

"Exactly," Ray smiled and messed up my hair by running his hand over it backward. "Night, Kid."

"Night."

Poking around the kitchen, I found some deer jerky that the ever masculine Ray had no doubt made himself. He was an excellent hunter and firmly believed in making good use of everything he caught. He always talked about how the Native Americans had it right and how it was necessary to respect the goods that nature provided for us, which included the art of hunting and not letting any part of the kills go to waste. Eating the jerky opened up the flood gates of hunger and I started whipping up some waffle mix. I added whatever I thought would taste good and poured it into the iron. The smell was intoxicating. I felt like someone was watching me, so I flipped around quickly. It was Ray. All the noise I was making probably woke him up. His hair was in front of his eyes as he sleepily walked into the kitchen with just a pair of boxers and a fitted white t-shirt on. "Sorry, Ray. Am I being too loud in here?" I asked apologetically. "Don't worry about it," my uncle shrugged. I haven't had a good night's sleep in months," he said while leaning on the kitchen counter and watching me flip the waffles onto a plate. "I didn't even know that thing still worked," Ray said, referring to the waffle iron.

"I don't remember it ever being broken," I replied. As a waffle-fiend I would know this. I always used it when coming up to Ray's house. It was messier, but much better than eating the frozen waffles that Dad always made Mom buy just because they were quicker. At Ray's house we did everything the old fashioned way because anything worth having was worth working for.

"Joanne and I were in the middle of an argument when she dropped it once...long story."

"Can I ask what finally made you kick her out?"

"I didn't. She left."

"Figures," I snickered and started pouring syrup all over the waffles on my plate. I felt as if she had wronged me as well by association and a fire started building up inside me. "If I ever see her again--,"

"Listen Kev," Ray interrupted. "Don't feel like that about her. It really wasn't her fault that things went like they did."

"The hell it isn't!" I turned toward Ray and barked. What the hell had gotten into him? "After all that damn cheatin' she did, runnin' around and making you look like a fool at work."

"It's not like how you think, okay?" Uncle straightened up from his reclined position against the counter. He looked frustrated and started pulling at the collar of his shirt as if it was choking him somehow, but I knew it was just nervousness. "I wasn't faithful either. We were messin' around with other people at the same time"

"Alright," I replied thoughtfully. "But still, you never left. If she had tried half as hard as you did to keep things together, maybe you'd still be married. She shouldn't have just given up like that!"

"Kevin, she caught me with another man," came the deafening words. I knew I heard them, but I wasn't sure if I'd listened correctly, so my mind kept trying to re-arrange the syllables in different patterns, trying to find any meaning other than the one I didn't want to hear. "She left because of that, not anything else. I don't blame her. At first she thought I was seeing another woman, so she cheated right back to get back at me. Then when she found out it was a guy...she couldn't take it."

I just stood there staring at him. Ray was supposed to be my hero, not some fag. He was the kind of guy you went to for help with your car, he was the kind of guy you picked first to be on your football team at Thanksgiving get-togethers, and the kind of guy who you got mad at for getting the most attention from girls. How could he be gay? I started to hate him for it. He was ruining everything. What did this all mean? Could I still look up to Ray, could I still hug him? Or would 'that' be gay? I didn't say a word at first, but somehow I found the breath to forge some. "I...I think I should drive home in the morning," I said.

"Ah, Kevin," my uncle winced with a tinge of disappointment in his voice. "Don't act like this is such a big deal. You think I don't remember how I used to catch you peeking at your brother in the changing rooms when we'd all go up to the lake together? And you ran off cryin' one time 'cause he caught you lookin' at his pecker."

My mind rewound itself by 10 years, back to a distant memory that I had allowed myself to forget. During the summer months it was typical for our family to go up to the lake or the seaside. And it was true; I had been fascinated with my older brother's body for years. He was so much bigger than me in more ways than one and I wanted to see it all, so I kept peeking in his dressing room while he changed into his swim shorts. Eventually he'd had enough of my staring and to teach me a lesson he smacked me right in the head with one of his flip-flops. I ran away upset, but Ray followed me to my hiding spot behind a tree and calmed me down once I felt safe enough to seek his comfort.

Uncle tilted his head at me. "My point is that you can't help who or what you're attracted to. I'm sure you would've kept on looking at your brother and perhaps other boys too if no one had ever caught you and scolded you for it. It isn't so strange to be curious."

"Well!" I began defensively. "Well, I like girls and that's all there is to it."

"That's 'cause you've never been with a man," Ray snickered. His words were based on self-experience. He knew what he was talking about because he'd tried it and the revelation felt admittedly erotic to me. "If you weren't my brother's kid I'd break you in," he joked. But it wasn't a joke to me and I could feel my penis begin to swell. "Hand me those waffles if you're just gonna stand there and let 'em get cold," he insisted and I slid them over. "Mmm, you did a good job. Nice and crispy on the outside."

Feeling something wet inside my underpants, I quickly made my way to the bathroom. I unzipped and took a look. Without even realizing it, my pecker had started to leak pre-cum while talking to Ray. I wish he hadn't brought up the thing about my brother or about "breaking me in." Just thinking of those words made my penis twitch. "No." I told it while looking down between my legs.

"You okay in there?" I heard on the other side of the bathroom door. "Just want to make sure you didn't fall in."

"Very funny," I responded.

When I emerged from the bathroom, Ray had his back against the adjacent wall and his arms were comfortably folded over his chest. Something else that suddenly crossed my mind, something I hoped that Ray didn't remembered was that my brother wasn't the only person I'd been peeking at that day at the lake. I started to feel very nervous and flustered. Ray was saying something about how it'd be a shame for me to just up and leave in the morning, but I absolutely wasn't even listening. "You okay?" he asked me.

"I just...I..." my eyes started roaming over Ray's body, recalling everything now and it felt as if I had X-ray vision as the vivid memory of his anatomy revisted my brain. I was in such a trance from the experience that my eyes wouldn't turn away from his form. Again, my penis reacted and was pressing against the fabric of my pants. I had to excuse myself before things took a turn for the worst.

+++

When I finally hit the bed it was just what the doctor ordered, but a sound from outside kept waking me up. I looked out the window and saw raccoons going through the nearby garbage. When one of them triggered the side door's sensory lights, it illuminated my uncle's truck. The passenger's window was still rolled down which was my fault and I remembered what happened years ago when my Dad accidently left his car window rolled down while we were camping and raccoons were around. They climbed in and trashed the place before attacking Dad when he tried to get them out. Lesson learned: raccoons are not cute and cuddly; they're a nuisance who will scratch your eyes out.

I crept out of bed and grabbed the truck keys before steadily making my way over to the vehicle, minding the raccoons and careful not to draw too much attention to myself. The creatures just kept feeding and occasionally looking over at me while I turned the car on and pushed the button to roll the windows up. Then just as smoothly as I'd come out there, I locked up the truck with the remote key and headed back into the house.

As soon as I entered the front door, someone grabbed me and shoved me into the wall. "It's me!" I shouted.

"Oh...Oh, Kevin. I'm sorry! I thought you were an intruder." Ray's rough grasp, the weight of his masculine body pressed up against mine, his male scent, and husky voice all aroused me. His strong hands still had a tight grip around my arms and one of his legs was between mine. My balls were sitting on top of his thigh. "Shit!" he said. I couldn't see his face well because it was all dark inside, but I could hear a slight smile in his voice. He started rubbing my arms where he'd grabbed me and apologized again. "Come here," he said, pulling me into his body and held my frame tightly. "I really could've hurt you , ya know. I thought you were a thief or something. Damn, that almost gave me a heart attack..." he breathed. Then he pulled back a little to get a look at my face. I knew now that he could feel the boner I'd been trying to kill by thinking of math equations and other neutral things. Upset with myself, I struggled out of Ray's arms. He was trying to tell me that it was okay and not to worry about it, but the words fell on deaf ears. I practically ran back to the guest room. "Kev!" uncle called after me.

I shut the door behind me and just stood there in the light of the moon with my hands on my head wondering how the fuck I could explain myself or make it so that it'd be something easy to forget about. I heard the door creak open and shut again before a pair of arms snaked around me. I felt Ray's chin on my shoulder and his chest against my back. My first thought was to just break away, but then I felt his lips caress my neck and he took my left earlobe between his teeth gently. He lessened his grip a little waiting for my response. Wrong as it was...I wanted to know what came next. I just sort of looked over my shoulder at him and he knew that it meant he should continue. I spun around once I realized he'd taken his shirt off with one quick tug and threw it to the floor like a warrior ready to throw down. I looked at his bare chest and nervously pressed my hands to it, closing my eyes as my fingertips rode down to his muscled abdomen and then back up to the stiff nipples poking through his sparse chest hair.

Uncle Ray held my face then turned his own sideways and connected our mouths together. His short beard was rough against my face, but his lips were soft like a woman's. He passed his long tongue into my mouth and I accepted it a lot more eagerly than I thought I might. As close as we were now, I could feel something hot radiating through my uncle's boxers and without even looking I knew it was his angry cock. Ray's chest rose up and down as he stared at me, trying not to ravage me, trying to ease me into the idea of going further instead of using force. But men are impatient creatures by nature and arousal got the best of him. He grabbed the top of my shirt with fury and tore it down the middle. My eyes widened with surprise and I started to feel too vulnerable. I attempted to pull away, but Ray wouldn't let me go. He held me in place and shoved one of his big hands down my underpants.

What was happening? How was I letting it happen? I mean I knew better didn't I? "Ray..." I moaned out my uncle's name. All he did was drag me over to the bed. He stepped out of his boxer's and took a seat on the edge of the mattress. It was obvious what he expected, so I planted myself between his legs with one hand on his hip and one around the base of his manhood. I could smell how much he wanted me through the dribble of pre-cum that had escaped his penis. The moment I allowed the substance to touch my tongue, I rubbed it against the roof of my mouth. As my lips began to massage the crown of his penis experimentally, I felt Ray's hand at the back of my neck and I knew it was time to take him all the way in. My mouth slid down his erection, orally noting every contour.

Hearing uncle sigh and push my face down onto his lap even harder excited me to no end. I couldn't help myself from slathering up his penis with spit, rolling his balls around in my hands. "Ohhhh..." he moaned, grabbing a fistful of my hair. I massaged the perineal area between his anus and his testicles gently. "Yes," Ray sighed. He spread is legs further. "Lick my asshole." It seemed like a silly thing to do at first, but the amount of praises, words of worship, and lustful groans that uncle showered me with were enough to convince me that this was a very good thing. His tight ring began to hug my tongue as it entered. "That's right, lick my inside ass you fucking brat!" Caught up in the moment, I started sticking my finger inside his hole next. "Not too much, boy," uncle warned me. I didn't listen though. I was too fascinated by the sight of my finger sinking into the hole of Mr. Tough Guy, Uncle Ray.

When I tired to be sly and stick two fingers into Ray's opening, he grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me up on top of him. "Ah!" I yelled, completely caught off guard. He bent me over his lap, with one leg holding me in place while he pulled my underpants down and spanked me. This was a real spanking mind you, the kind that someone gives you when they're really mad.