Finding strength after the accident
Kyle sat slumped in the hard chair inside room number three of the intensive care unit at Strong Memorial Hospital. He kept alternating his stares from Josh's unmoving body in the bed to the numerous monitors that were attached to him. Everything the machines were constantly displaying said things were okay, but since the accident had happened more than four hours earlier, he was concerned that Josh had yet to regain consciousness. The emergency room doctors had assured him that the CT scan, multiple x-rays, and other tests that had been done, showed nothing seriously wrong and were diagnosing a 'Grade Three' concussion. Even though he knew Josh being transferred from the ER to ICU for the night was more precautionary than anything else...at least until he came to again...Kyle found little peace of mind. He leaned forward, took Josh's hand is his, and softly begged, "Wake up, Pooh. Please wake up and smile at Tigger."
He had just tugged at the large bandage on his arm when he heard the room door open. He immediately stood up when he saw his mother step inside. He was careful of the fresh cast on her right arm as they embraced. She kept hold of her son as she quietly asked, "How's he doing, Kyle? Any change?"
"He's doing okay other than still being out cold, Mom," was his first response. "More importantly, how are you holding up?" He reached out and brushed away the newest tear from her cheek, while ignoring the fresh one that had leaked from his own eye. "You really need to be home with Susan and Beth," he added.
"Pop is on the way to get me. My mom and your other grandmother are with them at the house." She paused and inhaled deeply before going on. "They haven't told them everything yet. I just hope I have the strength to do it." Her voice was quivering and more tears came.
Kyle looked over at Josh again and then turned back to his mom and said, "I'll come with you." His own eyes were also now seeping.
"No, Kyle. Stay here with Josh. The last thing he needs to do is come around and be alone." She managed a slight smile to acknowledge his concern and then continued. "Your sisters will understand you not being there and with all the grandparents there, we will be fine." She took his left hand and rubbed the wedding ring on his third finger. "I can't do anything more for my husband, but you can for yours by just being here." Her voice cracked as she finished with, "At a time like this, you think you have to make hard decisions, Kyle. Being beside the man you have pledged your life to, unquestionably tilts the scale though."
More tears flowed from both as they hugged again. "Thank you, mom," were the only words Kyle could get out between his soft sobs.
"I need to get downstairs and meet your grandfather. He should be here anytime and as late as it is, they will give him grief about trying to get up to the ICU floor." She turned to leave the room but stopped and looked back at Kyle again. "Have you called his parents yet?"
"I was going to earlier, but never got around to it. And as late as it is now, and with what the doctors are telling me, I decided to let them get a decent night's sleep instead of being up all night worrying." He managed a grin and added, "And hope that Josh wakes up and can make the call himself instead of me."
Diane Roberts smiled at her eldest child thinking how much of a man he had grown into when she wasn't looking. "Good decision, Kyle. Just call them first thing in the morning no matter what. And call us at the house with an update too. Okay?"
He leaned over and pecked her cheek. "Yes ma'am. Will do." As he stepped into the ICU commons area with her, he pleaded, "One other thing, mom. Let me give Susan and Beth, dad's message. All right?"
She only smiled and squeezed his hand. "Of course I will. It should come from you." Her lips trembled as she added, "The same way the words he gave you for me. That was his way of passing the torch to you as the man of the family."
Kyle watched her walk towards the elevator and even though they were barely audible, he couldn't miss the sobbing. Once he had settled back into the uncomfortable chair in Josh's room, he took his partner's hand and raised his eyes to the ceiling. "For whatever reason, God, you called dad home tonight. Please don't let me lose the other man I love with all my heart, too."
* * * * *
Kyle stirred when the nurse touched his shoulder early the next morning. He only nodded when she asked if he would like a cup of coffee. Somehow he had managed to finally find sleep in spite of his mind constantly racing and the uncomfortably hard chair he had pulled up next to Josh's bed. He knew the hospital was making a huge exception by letting him stay with him in ICU, but Dr. Bennett was both Chief of Staff and a long time family friend and had approved the request. He also remembered the words he used when the head duty nurse questioned the decision. 'He is a second year medical student. He probably has already had nearly as much training as you have. And that is his husband. Case closed.' Kyle realized that there was far more hyperbole than fact in that statement, but he was thankful for the special breaking of the rules that he was being permitted.
He had barely swallowed the first sip of the strong coffee the nurse handed him before going back to her station, when he saw Josh's eye lids flutter the first time. He quickly sat the cup aside and gently squeezed Josh's hand. "That's it, Josh. Wake up for me." When those words got another movement of the lids and a mouth twitch, he increased his grip slightly and practically ordered, "Open those beautiful blue eyes for me and say something, baby." He also used his free hand to hit the call button for the nurse. "I think he is coming around," he told her when she appeared next to him almost instantaneously. She began closely watching the various monitors, but turned to smile at him when Kyle looked back to the bed and begged, "At least blink for me, Pooh. Blink for Tigger."
As soon as his eyes flicked open, Josh tried to get them to focus. Everything was blurry at first and his head felt like it was in a vise. He tried to speak, but his tongue was dry and his throat was raw from lack of fluid for more than twelve hours. As he forced his throbbing brain to concentrate on the voice he was hearing, his eyes cleared enough to recognize Kyle's form. He managed to finally half smile and mumble, "Thirsty."
Kyle instantly grabbed the water cup with the straw sitting on the stand beside the bed. A quick glance at the nurse got him a head nod to let him know it was okay to let Josh have a little. As he worked the straw between Josh's lips, he knew that would be the answer, but didn't want to overstep any boundaries by not getting permission first. He smiled as Josh greedily sucked the water into his mouth. He also managed to pull it away from his lips before the nurse had to tell him he'd had enough. She smiled again and gave him a thumbs up sign for his timing.
"Head hurts, Kyle," came from Josh next.
"I know it does, baby," he replied. "This wonderful nurse will get the doctor for you and make you feel better. Don't push yourself yet."
Josh squinted his eyes from a sudden sharp pain. He looked again to Kyle and asked, "How bad is it?"
