One More Time

Is it really a new beginning for everyone?

8===>

Derek and Lacy were only a few weeks into wedded bliss, when the first of several traditions with the three of us would begin. I had been invited...no, more like ordered...by Lacy to come over for a home cooked meal on a Wednesday night. At both their urgings, that soon became an almost standing thing every Wednesday. I enjoyed the socializing but also needed the time away from Derek also. Being around him at the grocery store was more than enough tugs at my memories, and I didn't need to add to the struggle at accepting that things would never again be the same. Between work and a heavy school load, I usually had a reasonable excuse to give them to ensure they had plenty of privacy the first six months. Over the cold winter months, I did join them on an occasional weekend night to play cards or watch a movie, but never felt all that comfortable being a third wheel despite their declarations to the contrary. As time wore on through the summer and towards that first year anniversary, I became closer and closer to Lacy; mainly because she seemed to be making Derek very happy. She had become like a sister to me.

As I continued to heal from what I had once been convinced was an irreparable broken heart, I ventured out a little more. I still had no real desire to find anyone to replace Derek, but I also needed contact with my own kind too. I was still completely in the closet with everyone I knew, but had finally buried all possibilities that I was anything approaching straight. I would stop by the gay bar just off campus every so often, just to grab a beer and mingle. With school back in session for the fall semester, the bar was usually crowded. I regularly had offers made to go home with someone, but always rebuffed the proposals. No matter how much I would have loved to spend a night of passion with another guy instead of surfing gay porn with one hand and working myself to orgasm with the other, I just wasn't the type to get into one night stands. That self-imposed dogma was to be soon tested however.

* * * * *

The Friday evening that marked twelve full months since Derek and I had last been together was spent at their place. Lacy had cajoled me into helping them start off their one year celebration weekend by having dinner with them. It was almost total deja vu as Derek and I played Nintendo while Lacy finished cleaning up after the meal. The erotic memories of an almost identical night starting like this one year earlier were enhanced by the fact that Derek was wearing nothing more than a pair of running shorts. Marriage had done nothing to quash the sexuality he oozed when he was nearly naked. The longer we sat on the living room floor and played, the more I mentally chastised myself for the thoughts I was having. It had been a fucking year and I still wanted him!

Derek had just destroyed me at Mario once again, when Lacy sat down on the couch. He leaned back to give her a kiss and then shot me a big grin. "Want to see the latest addition to the library, Brad?" came with the devilish smirk. I knew that meant that he had yet another new porno he wanted me to see. His fascination with smut had constantly intensified since they got married, and surprisingly, Lacy seemed to enjoy it also. Even before I had answered him, Derek was up inserting a disk into the DVD player. I leaned back against the front of the couch as he hit the play button, assuming that it would be worth watching since he tended to record movies that also included nice beefcake for Lacy. I snickered to myself as I accepted that this was a form of foreplay for them and in a way, I enjoyed it too.

Derek had planted himself back on the floor too, and Lacy stretched out on the couch. The movie was a good one that had enough of a plot to follow, but quickly got down to serious business also. Derek's eyes were welded to the screen when the female jerked down the stud's jeans and took him in her mouth. My peripheral vision caught Derek's hand slide into his right leg opening at the same time I saw Lacy slip her hand over his shoulder to caress his bare chest. Between Lacy's fingers and the vivid close ups of the movie, Derek was so preoccupied he didn't realize the soft moans he was making. There was no way to miss the bulge that had formed in my best friend's shorts, and soon the head of his dick was peeking out from under the loose leg fabric. Derek began teasing himself with his own hand as if I wasn't even there, much less just inches away. Lacy was peppering the back of his neck with kisses and running her fingers through his thick brown locks. Much more and I would be getting as good a live show as the one on the screen. I quickly shifted my eyes back to the TV trying to deal best I could with the erection I now had also. By the time the third scene of the porno flick had played halfway through, I took the unstated cue that it was time for me to leave them alone to finish what was started. I stole one last glance at my friend's hard cock snaking down his thigh in the dark as I pulled myself to my feet, and after thanking Lacy for dinner, headed out the door for my truck. I was only one block away when I decided to not go straight home.

* * * * *

The bar wasn't as crowded as I thought it would be for a Friday night. There were plenty of guys packing the place, but finding a table off to the back after getting a beer wasn't a problem. I didn't want to be alone at home, but really wasn't looking for company either. I slowly nursed my beer as I let my eyes survey the wide selection of young males that made up 95% of the partiers. If I had wanted to play the meat market game, this was definitely smorgasbord night. I tried my best to avoid staring at one tall, dark-haired stud in particular that reminded me far too much of Derek. I was just giving him the once over again for about the fourth time, when a single word question entered my ears.

"Brad?"

My head snapped to the left in shock as I heard my name and my eyes ricocheted off a very familiar face. Jeremy was a hunky 20 year old Kent State junior that had just started working at the store a month earlier. He was all of maybe a couple inches taller than me, sported a head full of bushy dark brown hair, had deep blue eyes, a decent build, and resembled me enough that several people at work had asked if we were related. Before my mind could process any kind of comment, he sat down on the other chair and very matter-of-factly stated "Imagine finding you here!" The grin on his cherubic face said there was no way I would get away with denying I knew it was a gay bar.

"No one at works knows, Jeremy," was all I managed to sputter out.

"Not even Derek?" was the totally unexpected question that came back. "I thought you guys were really close."

As my brain processed a dozen different ways to answer that one, I went with the safest: "Pretty sure he has a clue, but we've never talked about it." I quickly shifted the conversation to work, school, and then broached the topic of where we both were in the coming out process. Jeremy had been out since his junior year of high school but said he had nothing serious going at this point in his life. From other things he said it was obvious that he had many more notches on his belt than I did. I had managed to get away with only generically talking about still fighting the small town closet attitude and a very quiet, single high school fling that lasted longer than it should, but avoided saying anything that might connect Derek and me. He was married now and I had to protect him. Thankfully, Jeremy didn't push for details.

By the time I was sucking down the last drops of my beer, his hand had found it's way to my thigh. Whether it was the earlier stimulation created at Derek and Lacy's; or the complete lack of any physical contact for an entire year; neither my body, nor my brain resisted him. Quite the contrary in fact, as I placed my arm behind him on the chair back and rubbed his shoulders. We were silently staring into each other's eyes when Jeremy leaned into me and brushed his lips over mine. I shuttered my eye lids as his tongue forced its way between my lips at the same time his hand crept up and found my engorged crotch. I held him in an embrace as our tongues battled inside my mouth and he massaged the erection I couldn't have hidden with a steel jock strap. The very kisses I had wanted from Derek all this time, were coming so easily with Jeremy, and I didn't want them to stop. The only reason they did, was he suddenly broke off and licked the ridges of my ear before throatily whispering, "Let's find someplace a lot more private, Brad."

I had been so captivated by the attention, that all I could do was nod my head and mumble "Yeah...let's," before getting up and heading for the parking lot with Jeremy. At that point I didn't care whether this was a good idea or not...and getting involved with someone from work probably wasn't...but I knew I what I wanted tonight. More importantly, I knew what I needed: someone and something to help me smother the torch that was still burning far too brightly for Derek.

* * * * *

Since he lived in a dorm and had a roommate, we decided that Jeremy would follow me to my apartment at the lake. As we stood in the shadowy entry way, he had his arms around me, lustfully pinned up against my ass and undoing my pants from behind as I unlocked the door. I promised myself that this was just going to be a physical thing, but at the same time hoping it would be a release of everything I had held back for nearly five years. Maybe some passion-filled, one night flings were exactly what I needed to clear my head I thought as we entered the living room and Jeremy's tongue invaded my mouth again. As I held him tight to my quivering body and returned the kiss, the grinding of our hips began. Whatever he had in his jeans was fully erect and pressing against me with ever increasing eagerness. As we navigated towards the bedroom, lustfully stripping off each other's shirts along the way, I said a silent prayer that he understood just how much of a virgin I really was in so many respects. I also added to that request, that whatever was to come, would be a learning experience and not something to be regretted.

I was still fumbling with the button on his jeans as my cargos were swiftly undone and being pushed down my legs. They ended up bunched at my ankles, and I stepped out of them at the same time I managed to get Jeremy's zipper down. As soon as the well-trimmed pubic hair came into view, I realized he was dressed commando and shoved the jeans lower to reveal the hardness that had been pressed tightly to me just seconds earlier. I audibly gasped as a very thick cock at least two inches longer than my own popped free. My panting quickly gave way to a deep moan as Jeremy's hand began to knead my own, still covered, boner. My head wobbled backwards and I was staring at the ceiling when I felt Jeremy's lips begin suckling at the indentation at the base of my neck. The kisses and licks and suction from his mouth on my neck was making me crazy. His hand roughly, but lovingly, continued to tease me through my boxers as I finally encircled his raw shaft with my right hand. The notion of how so much different it felt from Derek's slender cock, was but a fleeting thought.

Jeremy pushed me backwards towards the bed, and was gently chewing on my ear lobe when he whispered, "Just so you know, I don't fuck on the first date...but damn do I love to sixty-nine." With that pronouncement, he dropped to his knees and used his teeth to drag my boxers from my hips. He quickly had me completely naked also, and was taking my begging tool in his drooling mouth; all the while with eyes looking up across my stomach and wordlessly saying: 'Enjoy this!' After more than a few moments of serious attention from his mouth, Jeremy pushed me onto the bed and climbed in beside me. His legs intertwined with mine and our hips grinded together as our mouths meshed again. Our hands were all over each other as I released passion with my lips and tongue that had been kept totally restrained for far too long. We were both on fire and I took the next initiative by rapidly rotating and snaring his huge red bulb with my lips. The loud moan that spilled from him when I began using my curled tongue like a miniature penis fucking his piss slit, said that I was hitting the right nerves. I slowly chewed my way down his long, thick, flesh baton, and soon felt his boy shrubbery against my chin. The tip of his mushroom was just at my tonsils and I mimicked a couple of swallows to let my throat muscles bring him even more pleasure. I had just started to work myself into a good tempo of bobbing and slurping on his silky wonder, when the last intelligible words either of us would say for the next fifteen minutes filled the air.

"Motherfuck can you ever suck cock, Brad!" The endorsement came with a hip thrust and a simultaneous re-stuffing of his own mouth with my secreting bone. For the next quarter hour, we rolled on the bed and uttered one muffled moan after another in what appeared to be both of us attempting to give the other the best blow job ever.

Even though I was certain Jeremy wanted to make this last as long as I did, we both finally felt the tremble in our nut sacs. The up-and-down rhythm of our heads intensified and was instantly matched with an increasing ramming tempo from each other's hips. Jeremy was tugging at my balls in a futile attempt to stave off my inevitable detonation. I was digging my fingers into his butt cheeks when I felt them clench and go as rigid as his cock was in my mouth. His head slammed on me once more and I felt my cock slip to his throat at the same time his balls erupted. I was greedily taking his load as my back arched one last time into his face and my own multiple wads finally succumbed to his talented mouth.

I had barely stopped coming when I was yanked up from his crotch and had a wet, sticky tongue wedged in between my lips. Jeremy's arms enveloped me and I willingly folded into them while we snowballed our juices together. We stayed that way for a quite a long time; wrapped together; kissing and fondling; savoring the unique taste of the combined man jam on our tongues; and doing something else that I had never done before...experiencing the real meaning of after glow as we cuddled and talked.

* * * * *

The next day at the grocery store, Jeremy and I shot each other more than a few mischievous and playful glances throughout the day. At one point I was positive that everyone in the place was seeing him catch my attention, look at me, and lick his lips. This type of overt teasing was something I was completely unused to and my reaction tended to be little more than a deep blush. I did ultimately join in with the flirting some, but he upped the ante when we hit the back room to grab some more stock for the canned soup aisle. After looking around to be sure we were alone, he huddled up against me from behind and gave me a few humps. Then, as he brazenly groped me from behind, he kissed the back of my neck and softly murmured in my ear, "I want a second date, Brad."

I had turned to tell him to chill a little when he shoved his tongue in my mouth and squeezed my crotch, creating an erection it would take a good ten minutes to will down. It was all could do to mumble out a 'Yes...Sure...Me too,' as our tongues battled. I did finally take charge and told him, "We need to cool it down some at work though, Jeremy. We don't need to get fired for getting busy on top the cases of Charmin."

Jeremy only grinned at me before giving my bone a last snatch through my khakis as we broke the embrace. "Yeah, I know what you mean, Brad. Wouldn't look good as a reference would it?" It was impossible to miss the hard on he was sporting in his pants too. "So...your place after work then? We can grill some steaks and maybe watch a movie. I really don't wanna go to the bar."

"Sure," was my almost non-committal reply, but I accented the desire for another evening alone with him with my own playful grope of his box and a wide grin. That evidently temporarily satiated his lust and the rest of the day went by with the ongoing teasing being subdued enough to keep us from raising any eye brows.

* * * * *

Even with sun being down, the mild temperature of a final Indian Summer day had us down to just our shorts on the deck...me in a pair of cut off 501's and Jeremy in cargos that hugged his ass like he had been poured into them. While we cooked dinner on the barbeque, Jeremy had done his best to pry some more details about my sexual past from me. It took some doing, but I managed to tell him most of my sordid story without implicating Derek directly. All I admitted about him was that we had jacked off together. "Derek always had a thing for pussy," was the explanation that seemed to work and stop any more poking around in that dark corner. I rationalized in my mind that it was a true statement...just not a all-encompassing one.

"So there has only been one guy and you had a long term thing with him, but never did anything but suck and beat each other off?" was the skeptical question Jeremy put to me.

I merely nodded my head as an answer. I was still trying to get used to being so open about what I had done in bed.

"Damn! Five years of specialized practice!" The grin that came with the crack was huge. "No wonder you made me blow like a volcano last night! I thought I was good at sucking cock, but let me tell you Brad, you are the best!" I was blushing at the compliment as he leaned in to me and pressed his lips to mine. "You make out like a cheerleader in heat, too," he breathed into my ear as he broke the quick kiss. I felt his hand caressing my crotch as he added, "Tonight, you let all of it out dude and enjoy the whole thing." Before he grabbed the tongs to pull the steaks from the grill, his tongue circled the ridges of my ear and I ended up with a boner that lasted halfway through dinner.

* * * * *

The embers in the grill had long since turned to cold cinders as things began to heat up in he living room. Since I had never seen it, Jeremy had brought a copy of 'Brokeback Mountain' and we had curled up on the couch together to watch it. It was easy to understand why the film had received so much buzz and acclaim. I did my best to take in all the messages it sent, but thanks to Jeremy's hand occasionally roaming my chest and abs, and kissing the back of my neck every so often, I knew I would have to watch it again when I could totally concentrate. By the time the credits were rolling at the end, both of us were sporting Sequoia-style wood thanks to an hour and a half of being cuddled up together and the very subtle foreplay.

Just as the screen went blank, I felt Jeremy's hand fumbling with the top snap on my cut offs and moved my hips back into him. My head turned to meet his face and he rolled me to my back as his tongue wet down my lips. While I parted my lips to allow his tongue access, my hand meandered to his box and gently kneaded the huge lump trying to escape the cloth prison that held it back. As I sucked hard on his tongue, his hand was continuing to work the buttons on my jeans, popping one after another until he had them all undone. I moved my hand and began my own efforts at getting his shorts loosened at the same time his fingers began playing in my bushy pubic hair. Just as I finally got his zipper to cooperate with my fingers and slide down, Jeremy's hand closed around my hardness and he let out a long moan. "Shit, how I want to bury my face in that cock hair forest of yours," spilled from his mouth.

Now totally in the mood also, and at long last losing my inhibitions, I grabbed his massive erection and boldly replied back, "And I want that lick this delicious hunk of flesh like a popsicle too." The smile that was on both our faces said that a wall was coming down and that tonight looked like something that would be remembered for a long time. I punctuated my newly found bravado by jumping to my feet and taking his hand in mine. As I pulled him from the couch, I ordered, "Come on you fucking stud...this little party needs to move to a more suitable setting." The look he gave me was delighted surprise combined with full comprehension thanks to what seemed to be an identical desire. With our arms wrapped around each other's waists, we headed for my bedroom trading spit the whole way.