Old Wounds New Love

Ethan woke the next morning to a constant ache in his ass that radiated down to his toes. It was a reminder of his shame, but he could never tell Mary. They'd come home late after the party and he went straight to bed after taking a long hot shower to try and scrub the smell of Afton off his skin. The emotional journey of what just happened had been too much. Not to mention Afton ignored him for the rest of the night. That was hurtful and confusing. Why would he have sex with someone in his study and then, what he was through? Was that how this worked? You fucked and then ditched your lovers? No way. Ethan wouldn't be like that, regardless if a part of him craved more of what he'd just experienced.

Mary rolled over to drape her arm across his bare chest and he had a wave of revulsion. She'd tried to have sex last night but it didn't work out so well. He'd convinced himself he was just spent which was why he couldn't get hard for her. That or he just wasn't interested. Either way, she wouldn't let up so he allowed her to give him a blow job, but the entire time, Ethan compared her to the mind blowing experience with Afton. Mary had a difficult time brining him to orgasm until he envisioned Afton's mouth suckling his long shaft; his tongue lapping at his tip. Scary that brought him to a violent explosion.

He was ashamed. He should keep his attention on Mary and not crave a man. He shouldn't. He couldn't...but he did.

Ethan hated the sick fact he had enjoyed any of a male on male experience and thought the only way to get over this was to just put it behind him. Yet each time he moved and his ass hurt, he was reminded that ten inches of male cock had been sheathed there. And he'd liked it. A lot.

He showered, dressed and was in the tiny NY studio kitchen by the time Mary woke up around 7am. She had to work today so rushed through her routine of getting ready and breezing out the door to the coffee shop. This left Ethan alone with his thoughts and he worried he go insane if left alone all day. Greta had slipped him a card before he left, on the front it was a typical business card for Afton, but the back it had a hand written note, reminding him that once Ethan made up his mind, to give him a call on his personal line which he included.

Ethan now toyed with the card, twirling it between his fingers but resisted picking up the phone. What did that make him if he did? Gay? No, he wasn't gay. He was straight. Wasn't he? The pleasurable ache in his ass reminded him he'd had a dick impaling him and it was a shocking realization that he couldn't be straight, not after that. He'd come three times! He never came three times – ever. Yet Afton had brought him there, again and again without much provocation.

Shit!

This sucked and he felt nothing by turbulent confusion. What was he to do now?

By ten O'clock he had lost all resistance and he picked up the phone. Before he could stop himself, his fingers were dialing Afton's private number while his hands shook uncontrollably. He no longer knew what he was doing or why, he was just doing.

"Afton Finemoore," the deep sexy voice said with a slight accent.

Ethan hung up.

He dialed again a moment later.

"Afton Finemoore," the voice was more annoyed.

Ethan hung up again.

His phone buzzed in his hand and he saw it was Afton calling him back and he panicked. Did he answer it? If he didn't it would go to voicemail and Afton would know it was him being a chicken shit. He had to answer. "Hello Afton," Ethan said defeated after hitting the green button.

"Hanging up on me isn't considered polite."

Ethan's head hung low while he ran the fingers of his free hand through his messy hair. "I know. I'm sorry. I just wasn't sure what to say."

"Try, 'hello' next time," Afton teased on a more playful voice. "Have you thought about what I proposed?"

"Yes." Single words seemed to be all he could choke out at the moment.

"Passcode on the gate is 8890. I am here and not going anywhere. I have cleared my calendar of all meetings anyway to relax after the fundraiser."

Ethan felt a chill of anticipation down his spin and shivered. "I don't know if I can come."

"Then don't. I hope you change your mind, but I won't force you. Just know, last night was the most mind numbing experience for me and I'd selfishly like to see where this goes."

Ethan could hear that Afton walked outside when the wind blew over the cell phone speaker. He envisioned him pacing around, maybe standing on his private balcony.

After a long pause, Afton sighed in frustration. "Why did you call, Ethan?"

"I guess I needed to talk to you. I don't understand what has happened." His shoulders slumped as he gave into the feeling of defeat.

Afton recognized his dilemma, filling his voice with a soft compassion. "I really do understand what you're dealing with. "

"I don't think you do. I came here to propose to Mary and I find myself having sex on a desk with a man."

"Mind numbing sex," he corrected, "And I was fifteen when I had my first experience. I had a girlfriend, was captain of the wrestling team and a total jock. I was supposed to take a job in my father's office and get married. But all that changed when I encountered a wrestler from another school alone in the locker room one night and he liberated me from the lie I'd been living. I felt your shame, humiliation and pain. While I worked through it, I thought my life was over. But once I accepted my new reality that I craved men, for the first time in my life, I felt free. Would you say my life is ruined?"

Ethan frowned, "No."

"It's not. Listen, my pool is calling me, so I am going to hang up. You have what you need if you change your mind." Afton paused and added, "I hope you do. Good-bye Ethan."

Ethan looked down at the disconnected call. Afton had ended the discussion before he could say anything else. It was arrogant and powerful. It made him want to rush over there and finish what he had to say, but Ethan knew that would be a mistake. He should take Mary out for a nice dinner instead. That only made him anxious and his mind kept drifting the handsome European looking man with an athlete's physique. He wanted Afton.

The clock jumped into his vision, blinking 10:30 at him. It was like a reminder that Mary would be home around 3 and that made his stomach churn. He couldn't face her right now, not when he was this confused.

Passcode on the gate is 8890. I am here and not going anywhere. I have cleared my calendar.

Afton had given him the freedom to choose to come to him and the tools to do so. Now he just needed to find the courage to go.

Gripping his hair in frustration, Ethan yelled loudly, cursing over and over. He wanted to go. He felt compelled to go. He craved the man that sat by a pool. He was standing before he knew it and grabbed his jacket and keys. Upon inspection, he realized he had just enough cash for a cab before racing out the door to hail one in the street.

He trembled violently for a few minutes as the adrenaline raced through his bloodstream. When he finally calmed down, he realized he hadn't left a note for Mary and called her cell. "Hey, Mary. I forgot to leave a note at home, but I am out running an errand and won't be back for a few hours. I will call you later. Love you," he closed and hit end on the call.

The cab driver parked at the gate and turned around, "You want to be dropped off here?"

"No, pull forward and I'll type in the code." He did and the massive iron gates swung open and his heart beat erratically. What exactly was he doing here? Did he expect Afton to erase all these erotic feelings that made him feel dirty? Or was he hoping Afton would pleasure him like he had last night? That thought had his dick hard in an instant and he realized he wished for the latter. He craved having sex again with the man and that scared the shit out of Ethan.

The toll on the meter blinked $30.00 so Ethan handed the man $40 and waved him off. "Thanks," he said as he exited and watched as the man drove off. Now he was stuck. He couldn't do anything but walk up to the door now. Walking home was out of the question and he had no more money to hire another cap to take him back if he changed his mind. Taking a deep breath, he walked up the steps and rang the doorbell.

An older man answered, "Mr. Finemoore is waiting for you by the pool."

Ethan choked, "H-he expected me?"

"Of course, sir. If you will follow me."

Oh my God

Ethan thought.

What the hell am I doing?

Out on the back patio, Ethan could see the pool down below. It was a large Olympic size black bottomed pool with a tribal design in blue tiles in the center. From here, he could see the symbol clearly. But he wasn't staring at the pool for too long. The tan and well muscular man lounging naked next to the pool had his full attention. And his body responded by throbbing to a hard erection. He was sleek, sexy and exuded a raw sexuality that few men had. Afton Finemoore was a supermodel and he wanted Ethan.

Afton hadn't heard him arrive yet and rested with his head back, eyes closed drinking in the afternoon sun. His cock was rock hard and rested against his stomach while he casually stroked it as if he imagined it were someone else's hand caressing him.

When Ethan turned, the older man was gone and he was left alone. The instruction was clear – he should go down. Slowly at first, his feet carried him down until he stood at the base of the stairs, gripping the railing with a white knuckled hold.

Afton looked up, paused and then a sexy smile promising all sorts of pleasure curled at his lips. "Ethan."

"I really don't know what I am doing here, Afton. I just need answers and you're the only person who can give them to me."

Afton stood, his erection bouncing from the movement. It was so large that it didn't remain flat against his chest but pointed outward, directly at Ethan. There was a glistening on the tip as if he had been aroused by whatever he'd been thinking and a clear substance pooled there. "I am glad you came. I was just thinking about you."

"Y-you w-were?" Ethan stammered, his heart beat faster.

"I was." Afton approached with the grace of a stalking cat. Every muscle rippled and his eyes never left his prey. "You're over dressed for a day at the pool." When he stopped before Ethan, his long fingered hand caressed his cheek, trailing down to torso until he tugged at the shirt. "Why don't you come and join me?"

"Can we talk for awhile first?" Hell, he sounded so weak!

"Of course, by the pool though. I don't want to stand around or go back inside. It's too nice of a day to waste." Before Ethan could resist, Afton took his hand and led him back to the chase where he'd been laying and pushed Ethan to a sitting position. He then straddled behind him and began massaging Ethan's shoulders. Ethan let him. "What did you want to talk about?"

Ethan melted under the massage and leaned back into Afton's strong hands. He felt his dick thicken, pressing against his jeans. So he adjusted to give it more space. "You."

"Ah, my favorite topic," Afton purred, his hands dipping over Ethan's shoulder, down his strong chest to where he toyed with Ethan's erect nipples. "But in this case, I'd rather talk about you."

Ethan couldn't speak. The sensation of Afton's hands on his chest was driving him to insanity. He turned his face to say something and found Afton's lips waiting, claiming him and stealing his words with a sizzling caress of his tongue. Ethan moaned.

When Afton released him, he smiled, "That is what I thought. You don't need words right now. You need touch. Lay back."

Afton shifted so he stretched out on the chase and invited Ethan to between his legs. Ethan complied. The fabric of Ethan's clothing chafed, but the pressure of his body against his raging hard on helped to ease some of his need to be touched. He then wrapped his arms around Ethan's chest beginning a slow exploration of his body, starting with the chest. Afton rubbed, stroked and finally slipped a hand under the fabric of his shirt to trace the hard ridges of Ethan's muscles. "You've an incredible chest."

Ethan leaned his head father back against Afton and closed his eyes. He hated himself for feeling any sort of pleasure from this, but he did and felt his hips pumping, begging Afton to go lower. Afton was toying with him though, and wouldn't touch his thick cock. He spent a considerable amount of time rubbing his chest instead.

"Can I take this off now?" Afton asked in a heated voice. He tugged at Ethan's shirt again. "It's uncomfortable."

Ethan only nodded. He couldn't even open his eyes to look at the gorgeous man seducing him.

Once Afton had it off, he made a tortured throaty sound that made caused Ethan's stomach and balls to tighten. It was a sound of pure desire and it made Ethan want to fuck him. He hated himself to admit it was a sound he wanted to hear again.

Afton continued a slow and lazy tickling of his now bare skin, but didn't talk. Instead, he let Ethan feel the sensations that caused his groin to push out of the top of his jeans.

Ethan couldn't stand the silence and asked softly, "What does this mean, Afton? Why am I feeling this way?"

Afton was beside himself. His dick throbbed, his ass craved invasion and his mouth watered with anticipation of tasting Ethan again. "You like men, more importantly, you like me."

"Am I gay?" He whispered, but that turned into a soft moan when Afton twisted his nipple gently. He liked that. A lot.

"Could be. You could also be Bi, too. I don't really care right now. You are here, I want you and you," he passed his hand over Ethan's throbbing cock, "want me."

Ethan convulsed with pleasure at the feeling of Afton's strong hand caressing his dick. "Oh God, what is wrong with me?"

"Nothing." Afton lowered his face to suckle the sensitive skin along his shoulder and bit down gently. He loved how responsive Ethan was and toyed with that for a while longer. He wanted the man practically exploding when he fucked him again. He also wanted to reciprocate today, not like last night that was all about seduction. He wanted, no needed to be fucked as well.

"I shouldn't like this."

"You should. It's who you are." Another sensual kiss along his neck caused Ethan to turn his head to allow him more access. It made Afton smile.

"How did your family react when you discovered you were gay?" This had been gnawing at Ethan in addition to the shame of feeling any sort of attraction to the gorgeous man.

Afton sighed against his skin and wrapped his arms around Ethan's torso to hold him. "Not well. My parents were immigrants from Ireland and were extremely devout. They didn't accept my choice and kicked me out when I was 17. I have found my own way since. I finished High School, got into college and made a new life for myself without them in it."

"Don't you miss them?" Ethan turned enough to look into Afton's insanely green eyes.

"Yes and no. I didn't get along with them anyway. They were content to be poor, and I wanted to be rich. I am happier now than I ever was, to be honest. I've also found some amazing friends who are loyal and strong, people I can rely on in a pinch. I could never with my family."

"I would miss my family," Ethan stated sadly.

"Do they love you?"

"Of course!"

"Mine didn't, so the rejection was simple. If your family loves you, they will eventually understand. Choosing an alternative lifestyle doesn't taint you, Ethan. It makes you stronger because now you are free to be who you should actually be. No more hiding, no more lies."

"I don't know. They are devout, too."

"Yeah, that might be harder to crack, but you have to be true to yourself. Are you living this life for them or for you?"

Ethan thought about this and released a tortured sound. "Me."

Afton grinned, slipping his hand under Ethan's waistband and squeezed his hard dick. "Then let me take your pants off."

"Oh fuck, I want you to, God I do, but shit, I don't know if I can, Afton," he waffled in shame.

"I won't hurt you, Ethan. I am one of the people who will catch you when you fall. Trust me," he said with possessive arousal that wormed through Ethan's resolve.

Ethan turned his tormented face up wearing a confused expression. "You were gay when you started seducing me, I am just finding out what I am!"

Another squeeze on Ethan's dick sent the man into a writhing mass as he rolled off the chase to stand before Afton breathing hard. The tip of his cock poked out of the top of his pants and was purple with the strain of being this engorged.

Reaching up, Afton traced the length with his finger, toying with the slit at the tip. The teasing promised incredible pleasure. This intention was mirrored in Afton's eyes and Ethan couldn't fight this any longer. He ripped off his jeans, stepping of them. When he was about to pull his boxers down, Afton stopped him.

"Wait, let me." Sitting up, Afton took hold of the elastic band and slowly, with extreme care, pulled the garment down. Ethan's cock sprang free and was immediately captured in Afton's waiting mouth. He sucked, licked and devoured him, enticing the blond man to let go of his inhibitions. When he felt Ethan's balls tighten firmly, he knew he'd succeeded, which of course caused him to release another heated sound in his throat.

Ethan stood holding onto to Afton's hair, pumping in perfect unison to the motion of Afton's mouth. His head was thrown back and loud grunts emanated from his throat as Afton swallowed him completely again. This is exactly what he needed and lost himself in the overwhelming experience. He felt powerful and alive. Ethan had no idea that a blow job to feel so damn good! He couldn't stand it any longer and pinned Afton in place while he unloaded his release with an anguished grunt of completion. It felt so good that it almost hurt. It took four waves of orgasm before his balls had emptied and loosened his grip on Afton's hair.

There were tears in Ethan's eyes when their heated gazes locked. "That shouldn't feel so damn good."

"Stop feeling ashamed. You deserve to enjoy this life to the fullest and if making love with me gives you that, so fucking what?" He stood up, pulling Ethan into a tender embrace followed by delivering a teasing kiss that promised so much more. "I need to take a swim." He didn't wait for a reply, taking two steps and then dove into the cool water.

Ethan guiltily watched his sleek body slide into the pool and felt his dick twitch. Afton's paler skin stood out against the black bottom as he swam through the water to the far side. Ethan didn't need an invitation and jumped in less gracefully, moving quickly towards the object of his desire.

Afton was waiting for him in the shallow end, sitting on a bench just below the surface. His arms were extended out to his sides while he watched Ethan approach with a feral hunger. "Come here," he purred.

Ethan followed like a moth to a flame and flowed into Afton's arms and lips as he was thoroughly kissed into further submission. They remained like this, changing positions a few times, and who controlled the kiss, but they were both heated to a frenzied state. Their hands stroked each of their bodies, while their cocks slide against bare flesh. It was maddening. Afton needed more.

"I want more than a blow job today. I need to bury myself in your tight body again." He reached outside the pool to a box in the cement and pulled out a butt plug similar to the one used last night. He kept toys out here for this exact reason – he loved to screw in the pool. "I need you, Ethan," he stated, his voice tight with aroused need. "Turn around and hold onto the edge."

Ethan didn't even think about it and turned around, offering his ass to Afton. He found it slightly amusing that he was so eager. He was a farmer by trade, strong and robust. He enjoyed doing sports and playing football with the ranch hands during breaks. Yet he reacted with wanton need, offering his body up without much resistance.