"Come on Rex, Jimmy, Alice' waiting already!"
"Wait up, I need to tie down Jimmy's shoes! Dad?"
"I'll tie them up, go to your Papa."
"Okay."
It took a while but finally my sons got their act together and bundled up into Alice and Bruce' car, and off they go for their weekend with my sister. It was the high point of their holidays, playing army and camping with their cousins, all of whom were close to their age, well except for Simon, a lanky sixteen year old. I watched the car trundle off into the distance. Rex was six, and Jimmy Jr was four and a half. It seemed only yesterday they were babies, and now they were off conquering made-up countries.
Suddenly I felt cold. Rex and Jimmy Jr were gone for the weekend, and now that left me and Jim. And Jim was going to collect on his promise - my promise - this weekend. I felt... delirious, like the time when I had to much coffee and could not for the life of me calm down, my heart palpitating like drums from deep inside a cave, palms sweaty and cold and clammy, feeling like standing at the precipice of a cliff, with only a hair separating me from the unknown.
I felt a warm hand tap on my shoulder. I turned and looked into the warm eyes of my husband who was smiling, perhaps aware of my whirling emotions. He was so handsome to me, my beloved husband, the man who took me, warts and all, and made me his, and gave me two beautiful sons whom I loved more than life itself. Funny saying that, how things turned out, why we were in this... predicament.
"Are you okay?" he whispered, still smiling.
"I am, just a bit nervous that's all."
"Nervous is good. Nervous means you care."
"I do." I kissed his hand, the hand that carried his ring. "Does it have to be... you know, him?"
His smile was unwavering. "You know it does. Then it will be fair. Now, be a good boy and help me dress."
It was funny business dressing your husband for his date. I determined to present him as handsome as possible, so that his date would seethe in the fact that after everything, at the end he would come back to me. Though now watching as my husband adjusted the cuffs of his dress shirt I wasn't so sure.