Just a little back story real quick. I am 34 and have been suppressing and ignoring my submissive sissy urges for a long long time. Honestly since I was probably about 18 years old when I started exploring my sexuality through the internet and found trans porn and deep dived into all sorts of videos and erotica. For years I tried to ignore it but eventually gave in and tried to find the right dominant man a few times. Unfortunately for me the three times I tried were complete disasters. Lied about age or looks, position and dominance, couldn't perform etc. Left me really disappointed and I just went back to my shell and tried to ignore the feelings and urges.
Lately I have been experiencing urges I can no longer control or ignore. For years because of my disappointment and nerves I would chat and possibly setup a meet and I would chicken out or the other guy would flake etc etc. Well several months ago I made up my mind no more. I will be patient and smart and find the right guy in the right situation that is discreet and fits all the parameters I desire and understands them and has the same desires on his end. After 4-5 months now and many chats and sharing of pics etc I finally got a message on Sniffies from a local guy who was into exploring all the same kinks as myself. I immediately got excited. For several days we chatted and shared things back and forth and a lot of sexually driven conversation as well as some normal chit chat which I enjoyed and made me feel more at ease. He immediately gave off the vibe of understanding what role he is in and what role I am in. That also was a huge plus and turn on.