Chapter 1
I haven't seen Brandon the rest of the week. Every day at school I would try and look out for him, but with no luck. I asked my mom if she saw him at the house or knew anything.
"No Honey. I haven't seen him. Maybe he left to go visit a family member or something." My mom replied the Friday evening when I asked her for the third time that week.
Ever since the Monday night when he came to see me, I have been looking forward to seeing him again. My heart would race when I think of how he laid next to me in bed. How we kissed in secret. I woke up the Tuesday morning excited to go to school, knowing I would be able to see him there if not on the road where I walked back from the bus stop.
But I was left with disappointment as the whole day passed with no sign of him. And so, it continued the whole week. Nothing.
I left my mom in the kitchen as she was preparing a quick meal for me, before she had to go back to the mansion. Every fourth Friday of the month, they would meet with Mr Berkley and discuss the next month's plans and arrangements for the staff schedule.
I walked into my room and laid down on my bed.
"Where are you..." I quietly asked myself.
It just felt weird. I couldn't make heads or tails from it. I should have asked for his number, but for some reason it never occurred to me.
I laid on my bed and stared towards the white ceiling for what seemed like hours.
"Lucian. You didn't eat anything." My mom popped up next to me.
Her sudden words bringing me out of the trail of thought I had. I imagined his dad sending him away to some sort of "Straight Camp".
"Sorry. I wasn't feeling really hungry. I'll go eat something now." I replied and got up from bed.
"You ok honey?" she asked whilst placing her hand on my forehead as if to feel for a fever.
"Yeah I'm fine." I said while hugging her.
It was dark outside, I noticed as I walked into the kitchen. The baked potato my mom made me was ice cold. I placed the plate in the microwave and turned it on. I could hear my mom in the background running herself a bath.
My mind was wondering again. The loud beep of the microwave pulling me back. I couldn't understand it. How can he just disappear from sight?
I grabbed the plate and went to go sit down on the couch. I flipped through the channels on the small TV my mom got from Bill the caretaker. I wasn't paying much attention to anything. By the time I finished eating I noticed I landed on some reality show.
I flicked the TV off and washed my plate. I had to know where he is... Is he sick? Maybe the rain on Monday gave him the flu? We were both completely drenched and maybe he picked up some sort of bug. But then surely my mom would have known that.
I looked outside the kitchen window towards the mansion. There were a few lights still on and I could see Brandon's bedroom light on. My mind was racing. I knew what I was about to do, but its risky. What if someone sees me?
I knew my mom was busy taking a bath and she usually takes about forty-five minutes. I quietly opened the door and walked into the night air. It was dark except for the light shining from the mansion. I quickly jogged past the large pool and moved closer towards the rose bushes for cover. I could see Brandon's room, but I couldn't see the inside as the curtains were rather foggy from this distance.
I nearly crawled towards the back garden that's attached to the main wall of the house. Large Ivy were growing over a wooden frame that leads up towards the house and windows of the seconds and third floors. Brandon's room was on the second. I knew I should be able to make it up as I am sure Brandon came down from there on Monday night when he came to see me.
I slowly climbed the frame, trying to not make any noise. As I steadily ascended the frame, I could hear voices coming from Brandon's room.
"I said NO!"
A man's voiced broke loudly. I recognised it as Mr Robertson.
"WHY?! I don't understand! I can make my own decisions in life!" I heard Brandon yell back to his father.
I stopped dead in my tracks and listened.
"You will not embarrass me like this! My son! My own flesh and blood! A faggot!" His dad spat the last word.
A loud thud noise nearly made me lose my balance. It sounded like someone dropping to the floor. I quickly pushed my head past the frame and peered inside the room. Trying not to be seen.
I gasped out loud. Brandon was lying on the floor with his dad standing over him, clutching his face. Mr Robertson's right hand in a fist.
"If you so much as even look at another boy, I swear to God! I will break every bone in your face!" his dad screamed and stormed out the room leaving Brandon on the floor holding his lip that was now bleeding.
I didn't know what to do. My heart was racing and an anger such as I have never felt before was boiling inside my stomach. Hatred towards someone I don't even know.
I looked inside again to see Brandon getting up and going towards the bathroom on the other side of his room. He was crying silently with tears falling down his cheeks. Should I do something? I wanted to break open the window, touch him and hug him, but the fear of his father coming back in made my feet climb down the frame again. Five minutes later I was back in my room. Staring through the window, looking out back towards the dark hill. I couldn't see anything, but I still pictured Brandon standing outside it with his toothy grin like he did on Monday.
I couldn't believe how awful his father was. Why would any parent hit their child for being different? I felt pity for Brandon. He was alone in his room and now his father was abusing him for being himself.
I couldn't sleep that night. I tried, but my mind wouldn't let me. When my mom's alarm went off, on her phone in the other room, I got out of bed to make some coffee. It was six in the morning and still dark out.
"You're up early sweetie." My mom said in between a yawn as she walked into the kitchen.
"I made coffee." I said and handed her the warm mug.
"Thanks."
I walked back towards my room when my mom stopped me suddenly.
"Lucian. Is everything ok?" She asked before I could leave.
Should I tell her? I thought to myself. What if she freaks out? What if she doesn't accept it? I'm not even sure myself how I feel, and should I tell her I saw Mr Robertson hitting Brandon? That means I would have to admit that I snooped and climbed the walls.
"Yeah everything's fine mom. I just slept bad." I replied and smiled at her.
I couldn't do it. There is just too much I don't understand myself and I need to talk to Brandon, to see if he is ok.
Chapter 2
The bus stop got closer as I walked down the familiar road. It was the following Monday and I still haven't seen Brandon anywhere. My mom told me the Robertson's were going to Italy for a week tonight and I wanted to ask about Brandon but decided to let it go. In my mind I already made a decision. I was going to go see him. Even if I have to scale the walls of the mansion again.
When the last bell rang for school that day, I could barely keep my mind straight. I knew there was a possibility that he might leave with his parents tonight, but deep down I hoped he was going to stay.
At around six I looked outside the window to try and see if there was any movement inside the mansion. My mom was still there setting up new curtains Mrs Robertson ordered from France the week before. Mr Berkley had everyone work late the whole week. I made myself a sandwich and wondered at what time they were leaving for their flight.
A loud knock on the door snapped my mind to alert and gave me chills down my spine. I walked towards the door and opened it. Brandon was looking at me with his great blue eyes.
"Hi." He said and moved his gaze to somewhere behind me.
His lower lip had a small bruise and his left eye had a purple mark around it.
"Oh my God! What happened to you? Where were you?" I quickly asked whilst trying to calm my heart trying to beat out of my chest.
He moved his hand to his lip and gave me a smile.
"Oh this? Haha. Don't worry about it. I was really sick with the flu and I fell in the shower. I obviously lost the battle there and the shower won. Should pick my battles more carefully." He said and looked up towards the sky as if to wonder about something.
He was lying to me I thought to myself. Maybe he was ashamed and didn't want to say anything. I looked into his eyes and felt my own pity for him burn for him inside my chest. He was wearing black shorts with a white hoody and flops. I was getting cold for his sake now as well.
"Do you want to come in?" I slowly asked. Not knowing why he was here.
"Err... I can't stay... I have things to do. My parents just left for the airport." He replied as he moved his feet around.
He looked as if he wanted to say something but couldn't. As if something was stopping him.
"Look... I..." Be he stopped mid-sentence.
I tried to touch his hand to let him know he can tell me anything, but before our hands made contact he pulled away and placed his hands inside his hoody pockets.
"I can't really be here. I need to sort out my life and decide what I am and what I am feeling..." he trailed off avoiding eye contact with me.
"I'm just not sure I am who I think I am..."
"Oh..." Was all I managed to say.
My heart was beating extremely fast in my chest. Brandon was here to tell me he doesn't want to see me. I felt a sting of pain shot through my chest and my eyes get foggy. Please don't do this I was thinking in my head.
"I'm not even sure what I am, but I do know I like you Brandon..." I said as I tried to avoid his gaze.
Please. I begged in my head again.
"Maybe we should think about everything. Maybe..." but he stopped again.
"Yeah..." I followed.
