"Fantastic game out there Nick, congratulations," said a coy voice from just beside the end of a long row of lockers; halfway down which stood Nick Jackman; a college football running back playing for UCLA. He was stood there in the casual clothes he had put on in place of his kit, and was preparing to leave to go to a house party ten minutes away to get drunk.
He looked left and saw a guy in glasses standing a few inches shorter than him. His name was Mike DiMarco, and he was quite a few things, just not cool. He was a nerd; an A-student all the way who had only just missed out on the Ivy League by a narrow margin because he was sick on two of his exams. He was annoying too; insisting on bugging Nick whilst the majority of people -- guys and coeds -- surrounded the long-haired pretty boy quarterback. "Fuck off Mike."
"Why are you always so nasty to me?" came the immediate question as Mike, dressed in jeans and a 'Fall Out Boy' t-shirt on, walked slowly towards him.
"Because you're a fucking nerd who only cares about his grades, that's why. I bet you're still a virgin."
"You know I'm not," Mike said proudly, only to be shot back down again.
"I don't count queer fucking."
"Why not? You want some."
Too close in body and in conversation, Nick reacted by moving to where Mike was now stood; two feet away from his open locker. "I'm not a fucking homo."
"Yes you are. Mind you, anyone would get excited about Ryan's ass," he said, taking a moment to dreamily think about the quarterback's butt, even though it was Nick's he wanted.
But before he could fall too deeply into the fantasy, Nick reacted by swinging a fist at Mike's face; hitting him square in the nose and making a cracking sound that alerted the NFL wannabe to the fact he might have done some real damage.
Still clutching his Math textbooks, Mike fell to the floor with a deadweight thud, but still managed to move enough to give Nick a sight of his bloodied nose. And Nick hesitated...
"There, pinch and tilt," he said, handing him a small pack of ice for his head and placing Mike's fingers on his nose. He sat next to him on the bench and Mike followed his instructions to the letter. "Sorry about that, man, just... hate people fucking talking shit like that."
"You know," came the muffled reply of Mike, who seemed to ignore the very first meaningful apology he'd ever received from Nick to try and get to the truth here, "the worst homophobes are usually the homosexuals themselves."
"You're not homophobic," Nick pointed out, tilting Mike's head a little more by grabbing his hair and pulling it.
"Ow! Watch it. I'm not a gay-basher because I am gay, and I admit it. You're just a Goddam closet case."
"Fuck you," Nick shot back unimaginatively.
"Fucking wish you would," Mike mumbled.
"What was that?" Nick asked angrily.
"Nothing," Mike replied at normal volume.
"Fuck off it was nothing. Say that again to my face."
"I can't, I've gotta pinch and tilt, remember?"
Nick grabbed his hair again and tilted Mike's head towards him. "Listen, you fu..."
"Hey, either I can pinch and tilt like you asked and I might have a chance of walking out of here with my face intact, or I can tell you what I really think. And seeing as though I'm right, I don't think you want that."
"What do you really think?" Nick asked, letting Mike go.
Mike returned to his previous position and sighed. "I told you, you don't wanna know."
"Who the fuck are you to tell me..."
"Nick, shut the fuck up!" Mike yelled back so loudly, it startled Nick. He'd never heard this usually placid guy shout before. Damn, he must have really pissed him off. "You're a queer just waiting to burst outta the closet."
"What the fuck do you know?"
"I know what it's like to be in denial, Nick, and trust me, when you come out, it's such a great release."
"I'm not coming out because I'm not in the motherfucking closet. I only fuck chicks."
"Oh yeah, so you bang my sister and you're straight for all eternity. I lost my virginity to a chick too, I'm still gay. And so are you."
"Fuck you, Mike, just fuck you," Nick replied, and yanked the ice pack away from him. "You'll be fine, suck it up you pussy."