I don't know when I first realized I was submissive, let alone bisexual. It was a gradual awakening.
Maybe, in part, it was because I had always been self-conscious of my size -- only 5' 7" and barely 140 lbs. Though I had dated lots of women, marriage was never in the cards. As I got older and the dates became fewer and farther between, porn became the main avenue for sexual release.
I went from vanilla to fairly raunchy stuff over the years, gravitating to videos where men were cuckolded and watched their wives get fucked or were made to suck another cock or even forced into anal sex as part of the action. And I wondered what is was like. From there, it was a natural progression to gay porn, and I latched onto videos and stories involving alpha daddies or bears, wondering what it was like to be the bottom or the middle of a spit roast.
To try and feel the sensation of being fucked, I ordered a starter butt plug set and over the course of a few months, gradually and somewhat painfully built up to the largest one before purchasing a realistic silicone dildo. I practised sucking on it and fucking myself, hoping that would sate my curiosity. But, of course, it didn't.
Now 52, I decided to seek the real thing. The only question was how. There were plenty of gay bars and a few steam baths in the area, but wanting to keep my bisexuality under wraps for now, I was concerned about being seen by someone I knew.
So, after a bit of research, I discovered an online gay dating site with local postings. I signed up for the free 10-day trial and posted a profile, identifying myself as bisexual and versatile/bottom, with an interest in oral, role play, fucking, nudism, and three-ways/groups. I posted a few private shots from the neck down.
Once the posting was accepted by the site the following day, I was in business. I started scrolling the hundreds of posts in my area, looking for connections within a 30-mile radius. And that's where I came upon MascMan12. He was 60, 6' 1" and 225 lbs. He identified as a top, with a preference for subs. The only two photos were of his cut cock, one soft and one hard. It was difficult to gauge the size though without context.
Best of all, he was online now, so I reached out to him. "Hey there," I wrote. "New to this scene and looking for someone to show me the ropes. Check out my private pics and get back to me if you're interested."
He replied quickly: "I could be. You say you're new to the scene. How much experience do you have?"
"None," I replied. "But I'm eager to learn and good at following directions," hinting at my submissive inclinations.
His reply was terse: Just an address and the time: "8 p.m. tonight."
As the day wore on, I wavered between excitement and trepidation, but remained firm in my desire to follow through. I showered, threw on some clothes and headed out for the 30-minute drive to MascMan12's home.
I arrived just before 8 p.m., parked outside the modest bungalow and walked up to the front door and rang the bell. Moments later, it opened and I was greeted by a bearded, bear of a man with a shock of white hair, wearing only jeans and a black t-shirt.
"Come in, and remove your shoes and socks," he said. I entered and did as told.
We stood in the foyer, and he looked me up and down.
"My name is David," he said.
"Kevin," I replied.
"So, Kev, you want to learn the ropes, huh?" he asked. "Once we enter the house, there's no turning back, understand? So, if you're having second thoughts, now would be the time to act."
Determined to continue, I just shook my head, indicating I was not turning back.
"Follow me," he said.
We walked down the hallway to a door at the far end, and down into the basement. It was unfinished with a cement floor, poorly lit and a bit dank. I saw a sling hanging from the ceiling in the middle of the big space, a padded sex bench with adjustable legs and levels off to the side, a table with various straps, paddles, dildos and bars on it, and various chains hanging from the ceiling. There were also a couple of couches and easy chairs. The walls were painted black and the windows had blackout curtains on them.
Fuck me, I thought. This is some serious shit here. This guy was clearly a total Dom. Now I was starting to have second thoughts. Pain was not something I was at all interested in. What do I do? David interrupted my thoughts.
"In here," he said, pointing to a relatively small bathroom with a toilet, sink, and a shower stall. We walked in. He seemed to tower over me in the bathroom, making me feel even smaller.
"Strip and wait."
I decided to go with it. Frankly, I was now starting to get excited about where this might lead. In for a penny, in for a pound. He exited and I peeled off my clothes, placing them on a small towel rack. He came back a few minutes later, carrying an enema kit. Naked, I felt even smaller in front of him.
"Get in the shower, and curl up on your side with your back to me," he ordered.